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About Ashley

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    East Sussex

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  • OCD Status
  • Type of OCD

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  1. That would be disappointing if someone has replied to you in that fashion, I would be happy to take a look if that is the case. Could it be you're reading more into this topic than is actually there and projecting your own thoughts? I know I often thought that myself, about myself when in the middle of an OCD compulsion ritual.
  2. Which is sad, because he's been trying to help you ever since you joined out forums. I removed you from the forums before, you begged me to be allowed back promising you would change and I am all for change so I relented, but nothings changed. You may want to keep your mental health conditions, which seems strange, but that is your prerogative, but if it's causing this amount of disruptive behaviour and arguments all the time outside of this forum too you may want to rethink that.
  3. No of course it's not appropriate, but no one situation is the same. If the user is relatively new then we have to try and educate them and help them understand. If a user is using the forum for reassurance month after month, then we will take some action where it's clear all else is failing. But if the person is trying to help themselves a little, then we should try and support them and not just keep saying 'stop asking for reassurance'. We have to give them alternatives at the same time.
  4. I think Wonderer pretty much explains it and why this happens. We have been doing this 12+ years now, and just occasionally we will see those entrenched people suddenly 'get it' and the turn around in their circumstances becomes remarkable to watch. Our job is to keep repeating and delivering the right message, in the hope that one day those people will get their 'got it' moment, be it a month from now or a year from now. What we perhaps have to get better at (I am guilty of this as much as others) is we need to show a little more patience and compassion to those repeating mistake after mistake. For most of them they perhaps cant help it, their OCD is just too strong for them to get it right now.
  5. No, this is not completely right. Do not confuse ERP with what CBT is. You can do all the ERP in the world, if the faulty thinking pattern is not addressed first then the perpetual OCD cycle will continue, ERP will usually not fix the faulty thinking pattern. CBT is the recommended treatment, not ERP. Good CBT will include behavioural exercises, but in my opinion ERP on its own is most likely going to lead to failure.
  6. Hi, I think you may be thinking about this the wrong way. The way OCD works is exactly the same, regardless of 'theme' or 'flavour', it's not the theme or the flavour per se that is the problem, it is how we allow the OCD to handle those thoughts and feelings (obsessions). So really what I am saying is don't treat the theme, treat the cause so I guess what you need to be asking 'are there any good books on OCD?', and the best which is CBT based is 'Break free from OCD' But books are only effective if we understand and apply the learning correctly, and if most of us could do that we would not need help... so you will need to access CBT from a therapist to overcome OCD in most likelihood.
  7. I'm sorry it's not an area I have had much experience in, I would have to make enquiries to find out rights. But, there's no guarantee medication will work so forcing that on any patient (adult or child) seems a little OTT. What may be helpful to try and understand is why she refuses to engage in CBT or medication? If you can understand that it may help with a solution.
  8. Just a reminder for those yet to sign up for this, it offers real opportunity to hear from an OCD specialist, someone with years of experience of researching and treating OCD.
  9. Piers Moron on ITV.. means time to put absolutely any other channel and programme on. Despicable odious man.

    1. taurean


      I never watch anything featuring him. 

    2. Tez


      Hi Ashley.  Big feature by Bonnie Greer criticising Piers in this week's edition of the "New European" paper. 

    3. daja
  10. Hello there, There is no quick answer to this. OCD can be overcome, people can learn to deal with the anxiety caused by OCD, but they can only deal with it through treatment, something that needs to be worked at, sometimes repeatedly with an OCD specialist. If I am honest, the best advice on supporting him is to ensure he is getting the right treatment. Ashley.
  11. Hi Heidi, Happy to try and help if I can. It's not something that will happen immediately, in fact CBT does not really aim to 'stop' or 'lower' the thoughts, the purpose of CBT is to help you change the way you respond to the thoughts. When (may take time) the therapy starts to help you do that, then because the thoughts no longer scare you, the frequency of them automatically drops off and they become non-noticeable. Does that make sense? Yep, I think this is pretty common with OCD. The problem is with our OCD it 'feels' so real, so when we get an unwanted horrible intrusive thought, the fact it feels so real means we convince ourselves we are capable of acting on it. If they're unwanted and unpleasant then they're intrusive thoughts (from an OCD perspective). Technically, a thought of winning the lottery is am intrusive thought too, but we don't worry about that because it's a pleasant intrusive thought. It's not that you choose to invite them in, it's just that the focus of your OCD is so strong you end up thinking of them all the time.... it's what we call the 'pink elephant' effect. If you are told to imaging a pink elephant, then suddenly told to stop thinking about it, most people end up with an image and thought of a pink elephant in their head. So if you have a fear of contamination with OCD, you will guarantee you see every contaminated item on the street. If you have a fear of hurting children you guarantee a 100 children come out of nowhere and brush against you. Our OCD focus is specifically scanning for it, partly to avoid it, but when we scan we bring the focus to the forefront of our mind too. Hope that helps explain a little
  12. Hi, Glad you're feeling better. Did you take on board what I said yesterday? Only nothing appears to have changed.
  13. Huge thank you to everyone whose supported our move into the office, either through your kind donations (I will email to thank those people in the coming week) or through your messages of good luck, it really did help. Our office is not huge, but it's now kitted out for what we need at the moment. Attached is a panoramic image I took today, all I need now is some greenery to brighten the place up. As you can see, I have two working desks, mine and one for any volunteer that wants to come and work with me. I also have a dispatch area, and it's so nice not being cramped and being able to lay out all the different envelopes and leaflets on a rack next to my dispatch area which will speed up my dispatching of orders and charity merchandise. We have a magnetic whiteboard for training and I have a literature display near the door for any visitors to see our publications and finally even a coat rack. We have a small fridge, two sofa chairs and racking with all the charity stock (about five more crates left to shift then my home is my home again). If in time I need to expand with more volunteers or staff we should be able to get at least 3 or 4 more desks in if needed.
  14. Where is this legalseagull, which IAPT service? I certainly need to be addressing this. Neither 5 sessions is likely to be helpful and 15-20 minute therapy sessions are absolutely pointless. By time you get in, take coat off and discuss the previous week and homework time would be up.
  15. Hi Dave, I see you posted another topic overnight, which my mod team removed because of adult content. But I also noticed on the two threads I have asked if you have used the forum before you have not responded. My concern is that you have posted the same question about your sexuality on the forum hundreds of times over the last few years, and simply either are unable to or refuse to take on board the excellent advice you have been offered. I am unable to allow these threads 'I don't think it is OCD' to continue, for your sake as much as the forum.