tia123

A lot of thinking today really bad unfortunately. Cant let the event go but Ive lived with it for so long. How did I get through all those years. Guess i put it to the back of my mind. When a traumatic event happens in my life ie Loss, bang their it goes again. Apart from the last month i havent had a bad episode for 4 and half years where I havent been able to not cope. I then split with my partner of 11 years. Im meant to be goin overseas at the end of the year not sure if I will make it there. I just want to be normal if thats possible. How the hell Im I goin to get through the next god knows how many years.

Just wanted to say Ive had the best day today in a long time. The episode that was bothering me, which happened 35 years ago, is still there in my head but not anywhere near as bad as it was. Think the meds are kicking in.

Thank u

Ok I have talked about it on here before a few years ago and was told I did nothing wrong. Its just got well and truly. Thank u for replying. Im sorry for over use. Ive read its not good to be on these forums just feeds the ocd. I will en deavour to stop. Its just that I have no one to talk to. My partner and I split 5 years ago he knew me and my ocd. Thanks again

Sorry. Just something that happened 35 years ago. Not doin very well at the moment. Dont know if Im a bad person. I guess I have to tell u what it is im having a problem. Just want to be happy.

Hello Polarbear

Is there any point in me telling abt my incident that happened 35 years ago.

Feel like im losing it. Do i have to live like this for the rest of my life.

Someone please help me im so scared

Hi felt really good yesterday felt more positive more like me that dosent happen very much anymore. Im thinking of things way back when I was 13. Can I not be happy my head im a prisoner and have been for a very long time. Im sorry to have posted again. The meds im on Mirtazapine are kicking in a little

Ok thank u again. I suffered with ocd for 40 years since the age of 8 did put 10 on one of my posts but it was 8. Im goin to get some help think I need to. Thank u again its much appreciated

Polarbear thank u for your reply. I have to get a hold of this its ruining my life it really is. I feel a bit better its out there i told u my worst nightmare. Just have to get a hold of things

The fact i pushed it in. My ocd is trying to twist it all

both

because of my intrusive thought.'that I wonder if he woukd react cause I was wiping him' When I finished i pushed the pad in