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  1. Fear of schiz or going crazy

    Ironically I just suffered another theme . There's plenty of help and knowledgeable people on here who can help you. Just ignore it as much you can. Try not to ruminate .
  2. Fear of schiz or going crazy

    This was my first ever theme nearly 20 years ago. You will overcome this. Everyone has an inner voice . Try your best to ignore it . I thought I'd never get over it but I did by developing a new theme and now I know this is nonsense. I know how hard this can be it scared the s@#t out of me. Hope this helps knowing its quite common.
  3. Does this mean I'm my thoughts?

    This really feels so real right now. Please any help or advice i can't seem to let this go.
  4. Here is am back in the throws of ocd. My partner and I went for a meal on Sunday. She noticed a girl she knew who worked as a waitress. I thought she looked attractive and seemed like a lovely person. Then to my horror my partner said she is a friend of her sons. She is only 16. I was ok but knew when I got to work yesterday I would start ruminating. And so it went on. I made the mistake of testing and got the groinal response. Now I think it's true because of this and feel disgusted with myself. And all the other dreadfull emotions. I thought she was older as she was working in a restaurant. Thanks for any advice or help.
  5. Yes iv started a new topic on this as this is mans post.
  6. I have started this topic so I can understand the falsehood of the disorder. Although I find it extremely hard at times I understand the erp but struggle as to why my brain can think the most horrendous thoughts . As I said on another post I stumbling on the moment when I have an intrusive thought and for a second it seems I want to think it as for example my mind wanders or is curious. Then to my disgust I realise what' happening and end up with extreme panic thinking iv thought these horrific thoughts on purpose. I really seem to struggle at this point and start to believe I'm what I fear. I hope this makes some kind of sense..
  7. Thank you as always taureen. But how do I understand it being false. How would I go about this. (Ps I don' mean to hijack this post)
  8. I'm learning to except when in a bad period it will eventually pass. Although it' a struggle. A stumbling block for me is it is as if my brain is a split second quicker then my mind , as in the way I get an intrusive thought or spike. For a second it' as if I wanted to think it like I let my guard down. Not realising my mind wandered. This is what I'm really struggling with. I then beat myself up telling myself I must of wanted to think it and it' not OCD. Whilst telling myself I must be what I fear I am. Please if anyone can relate to this I'd appreciate it. And we very much owe it to ourselves to have a better life. I wish you all the best the man who can stop.
  9. Christmas day

    May I wish everyone all the best and do there very upmost to not let ocd ruin there day . I know how hard it will be for some.
  10. Does anyone get an intrusive thought or even think they thought it on purpose. For example I was itching my backside and a thought popped in say that's how it would feel if you was touching a young persons backside to my disgust. Now I'm thinking if I wanted to think it or did I imagine it for a split second how it would feel. Like for a second I wanted to think it. I don' know. I just need some help on this. Please if anyone can reply then do.
  11. I' really struggling. I had a so called groinal response this morning. I was mentally checking arousal. I feel horrible. I feel drained by this. I hate this feeling. It really affects my quality of life. I feel I won' ever forgive myself or get over this.. please anyone I need a lift. Can somebody explain in detail an actual groinal response as I have felt different sensations during my time suffering from this crippling theme. Many thanks and best wishes
  12. Christmas Anxiety

    Hi I always struggle at xmas. Due to the nature of my intrusive thoughts. I feel I don' deserve to enjoy it or be happy . I try and just take it day by day.
  13. I feel repulsed I'm having such a bad time at the moment. My intrusive thoughts and groinal response have taken it to another level . I am now getting or having what I can only describe as imagined sensation or thoughts or smells. It' as if this monster in my mind really knows how to cripple me. Basically my mind is comparing stuff like my tongue moving in my mouth to a sex act and sayin that' what it would feel like with a child. Oh my God I can't believe I am writing this it' so bad. Then another example is smells. This is what really disgust me I'm horrified to even write it. Again it' comparing the bodily odors such as anything sexual to that of a child again. I really can't go on like this I'm so scared. I don' know how my mind can come up with stuff so disgusting . I think you will know what I mean without being so graphic. Im really frightened I wont get any feedback on this. I must truly be a sick person. Please someone hopefully can explain how to deal with this horror.
  14. Relapse but new doubt

    Thank you pb. But if I'm honest I'm now checking if I am and for a split second I feel something. I' horrified.