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About lostinme

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    Painting,jewellery making,writing poetry,sewing and anything artistic.

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  1. It is hard at first, but it does become easier the more you do it. In time you will wish you had done it sooner. It's very rare I ruminate now it's usually when I don't even realise I'm doing it, but as soon as I realise I am I stop it straight in it's tracks and say I'm not going there. You will feel so much better believe me
  2. You can do this kaheath just focus on something else every time the thought pops up, just think I'm not doing this right now and just keep doing it over and over again
  3. Well done David you've done really well, be proud of what you've achieved so far
  4. My therapist always says there is no such word as can't! Im starting to realise when tackling compulsions it's not that I can't, it's more like I won't because I'm afraid to face it. So yes tackling and removing our core beliefs through cbt and erp we can definitely change the can't to a can
  5. It will still be important to you and that won't change, what will change is your thoughts and behaviour towards it. At the moment you are giving it importance by feeling A. compelled to do it the right amount of times and B. because if you don't you fear your relationship might end. A. you are ruminating about it and when you last did it, because B you fear that if you havnt had it this week your fear of breaking up might come true? Is this correct ? A is a compulsion and B is an obsession the things you need to work on stopping. So it will still be important to you but you will be changing the importance you associate with it. You need to work hard on the cognitive side as well as the behavioural side. Hope this helps you kaheath
  6. Yes this sounds like your ruminating over it kaheath and giving it importance. This is the thing you have to let go of and not give importance to. Every time you think of it, think I'm not going to do this right now and focus your attention to something else and just keep repeating this process over and over again. Believe me it does get easier but it takes time and practice. At times you will ruminate and not even realise you are doing it, as soon as you realise you are apply the same teqnique. Remember that no matter how much ruminating you do you never get the answer you are looking for.
  7. Some great advice from PolarBear, it takes lots of practice but keep doing it over and over again and eventually you will get there
  8. Well done dreaming you should feel really proud of yourself
  9. As any one else had any problems regarding security alerts?
  10. Hey Jess if and when you fancy a chat inbetween Ashley setting up the new chatroom biscuitcat opened a thread in the central perk where we tend to chat at the mo, if you fancy joining in there
  11. That's so sweet Roy. Looks like you and Phil have found that one special person that makes your life complete it's so nice to hear
  12. It sounds like you've got a truly happy relationship PhilM and you think really highly of her it's lovely to see this, they always that there is that one special someone out there just made for you and it's looks like you've found your perfect match
  13. That's really sweet to hear you guys talk about your wives so highly with so much love and admiration