Pandaman187

Ok, that's reassuring:)

So I've been having these intrusive thoughts about grabbing a knife and just killing everyone in my family. These have become urges and my mind just keeps saying "do it, do it, it's so easy." I feel like I have to resist to not do it. Sometimes I grab a knife and thinking "I'm gonna kill them tonight", and then put it back immediately. It's oddly reassuring. Are urges part of Ocd or is this something else?

Ok, how do you delete this post(I edited my comment to ask)?

Alright, I will try my best.

Ok, so my OCD kind of like peaks when I am overwhelmed by these thoughts and then I kind of suffer some sort of panic attack. Then I rationalize and continue to compulsions because it stops my panic attacks. Is there any other way to stop being overwhelmed(I don't want to take drugs or anything of the sort).

It is very challenging to dismiss it is because the more I try to dismiss the thought, the harder it is to make it go away. And also I try to find evidence that I will not do it like repeatedly picking the baby up and putting him down to reassure myself.

So today I was holding my baby brother and I had this image of me throwing him at a wall. I dismissed it as irrelevant. But then it came back, with more detail, bones cracking and the sobs. Just the sheer brutality of the image shocked me because how could I have imagined such images(I don't play violent video games or anything), unless I was gonna do it. So those thoughts turned into urges and I was scared that if one day I lost control of myself, I would do this act. Those thoughts keep coming and I avoid touching him with the fear. I really don't know what to do! Please help!

Alright, so those thoughts aren't as distressing as before now. I think I have them mostly under control. Thanks for the replies!

I am really scared that I will lose control and kill myself. It's like irrational. Also, this huge part of me just berates myself for being such an idiot. Which leads me to think I'm somehow mentally disabled and suicidal. Supposedly I'm considered a "Genius" by IQ standards but a normal person does not have thoughts and urges to stick their hand into an outlet. I'm really frustrated I can't think my way out of this like I normally do. I've heard using logic to break through might help but it just doesn't work.*sighs* Goodnight.?

Hey everyone. So these past few days a thought turned up which was "what if I stuck my hand into an electrical outlet. So, I thought that I was going to commit suicide which was Not What I Wanted. Basically, I thought I was bat-**** crazy. So, I would move my hand close to an outlet and pull back my hand just to reassure myself that I did not want to commit suicide. But part of me just thinks that if I relax a little bit, the first thing I would do is stick my hand in an outlet. I am very confused and frustrated. Please help!

Alright, thanks!

Yes PolarBear I do ruminate and pick apart my thoughts. I also avoid touching knifes and such. So it probably is OCD behavior. Another question. I've hear stories of people with Harm OCD getting their child taken away or being put in a psychiatric ward after telling a psychologist about their thoughts, is it likely to happen? Thanks for the replies everyone.?

Hi everyone. I'm pretty new here and I'm pretty sure I have Harm OCD. First, I'll tell a little bit about my situation. About a month ago, I was watching television and I had this random thought about grabbing a knife and stabbing my family. I first ignored it but as I was trying to fall asleep, the thought kept coming back and crashing on top of me. I couldn't sleep so I took to the web and started searching up these unwanted thoughts and what they meant. When I searched my thoughts up, the thing that came up was psychopath. And I was worried that I was a psychopath because the "Violent Thoughts" that I didn't want to have were part of the symptom checklist. My heart rate spread up and I started sweating and I felt dizzy. I crawled out of bed in the middle of the night and told my parents. They sent me to ER the next day and all the checks because they thought it was a heart problem and I couldn't bring myself to tell them it was the thoughts. Gradually, I found out my thoughts matched more of Harm OCD. These thoughts do not go away and are always there. Over time, these thoughts turn into fear that I will act on these thoughts and I thoughts I will snap and turn into a bloodthirsty psychopath. This has not happened yet but I am worried it might. I don't know if I actually enjoy these thoughts or if it is just tricking me. I really hate these thoughts. I have been feeling really down lately and sleepy all the time. Can someone please tell me if I am a psychopath or if this is just OCD getting me to think that way. I have not been diagnosed with anything. I'm scared to **** sometimes and sometimes totally rational and believing these are just thoughts. Please help!