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bluegas

OCD-UK Member
  • Posts

    509
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About bluegas

  • Birthday 21/06/1979

Previous Fields

  • OCD Status
    Sufferer
  • Type of OCD
    Pocd

Profile Information

  • Gender
    Male
  • Location
    Bristol
  • Interests
    Sport having a laugh when I can

Recent Profile Visitors

4,319 profile views
  1. Thank you I don’t have any practical solutions but what the op writes really resonates with me so my support is all I can give ! But thanks again
  2. Sorry to be as unhelpful as I always am but I’ve struggled with pocd on and off for the last 25 years to ! And going through a tough time at the moment brave people like you posting let’s the not so brave people like me know I’m not alone so thank you for that and I hope you get some peace soon !
  3. Hi phill you really have triggered me by changing that slab! I’ve been working so hard to leave all my imperfections alone and now ocd is telling mel I need to go and change things just because you did! But I really am going to do my best to stay strong! I’m by no means saying this to make you feel bad or have a go ! But I really want you to see what a slippery slope your on ! You completely ignored everybody’s advice on this ! Which I completely understand I know that feeling when the compulsion is so strong you’re gonna do what ever it takes ! I was out rebuilding a wall Xmas eve because the anxiety was killing me and then still wasn’t happy so Xmas was ruined anyway but how you ever gonna take control of your life back by giving in every time! I get it I really do ! I don’t know maybe I’m writing to myself ! Just hope you and me can find some peace
  4. You definitely never up set me I thought I upset you ha ! ButI think your bang on here!! at the moment I’m really struggling with really dark intrusive thoughts when I’m being intimate and the guilt shame and disgust they leave me with is unbearable leaving me feeling like a monster so I suppose yeah your theme to me seems easy and probably vice versa but they are both hell on earth for us respectively!but trying to spot the common denominator in all this which is of course OCD and that is where any theme stems from so it’s just worth sometimes looking at it from another angle! I suppose !
  5. Ha ha thank you for that my friend it’s nice to know I make sense to someone
  6. Yeah I am a builder and if my fears/themes were health/contamination I would 100% be the same as you but because there not I probably view it at the same risk as driving on busy roads as in a accident could happen but my brain sees it as a small risk! In my not very well educated way of explaining things I was just trying to say you should try focusing more on the fact that the ocd is causing you more of a problem than the lead or which ever material ever will ! It’s so hard I know but I’m trying myself to deal with the ocd rather than than trying to fire fight every problem it presents me with. I hope this has made some kind of sense
  7. Sorry if I triggered you . Wasn’t my intention I know what I’m trying to say in my head I just can’t ever seem to put it to the right words
  8. Please please leave it you change that slab and something else will take its place and feel 10x worse! I know I’m a builder and have the exact same issues as you do expect it was happening every day! At one point I was charging work redoing work! I lost Christmas because of one brick being slightly darker than the rest! But with some help from my wife I’m learning to leave things alone it’s hell at first and I know it drives you crazy but each time you leave it ! It becomes easier at one point my wife made me swear I would not change a wonky brick and I felt like I was gonna explode but that brick is still wonky now and I hardly even think about it ! It’s not easy and I’ve got a long way to go but changing that slab is a compulsion! And we all know compulsions are about as helpful as sunglasses on a bloke with one ear !
  9. I know you mean well you just seem to miss the point and can unintentionally be quite triggering! At the end of the day we are all learning and trying our best to help each other I myself have been pulled up in the past in how I come across and I’m trying to do better! Just maybe take on board your views might not always be helpful especially when we are in a sensitive group
  10. I’m doomed then ! Cheers Howard as helpful as ever
  11. I’m reading this and thinking the exact same as you! I guess ocd is the key phrase here! I’m a builder and handle lead copper and other metals regularly without gloves eat my lunch and in the past when the kids were small probably went home and picked them up! Now admittedly I probably could do with upping my health and safety game but my brain sees it as a very small threat! Where as something that happened 10 years ago like flirting with another woman or whatever I’ve obsessing about seems like the worst thing in the world !! What I’m trying to say is we need to see ocd for the illusion that it really is ! Because it really does tell us lies! My theme’s seems to change like the wind these days and maybe one day I will become obsessed with contamination fears but I’m just trying to point out that it’s not the theme that’s the problem it’s the ocd !
  12. I promise you are not alone I struggle with exlactly the same thing! I’ve said before the thoughts are bad enough but the shame and disgust it leaves you with is next level! I often think it’s a side of ocd that’s not really discussed much even in the ocd community’s
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