Logic has left the building!

[cam]

Can someone please kick some sense into me!!

My parents are visiting at the moment, and causing me and my partner no end of stress. They dont mean to but they can get really annoying.

Totally diffrent generation, im finding it impossible to relax, sleep and have to be ON all the time

We went to the zoo today, had a lovely long day, fed the animals and i thought it all went perfectly until the end.

This is where i am being stupid and just cant let go, i fed a giraffe and went to use the wall hand pump to get some anti back lotion out to clean my hand.

As i pushed it i saw red or brown dots all over the machine and i have convinced myself its blood. I know the rules but im freaking out and cant have a min to myself to get myself in control.

I have no cuts, nothing so i dont know why im worrying and it was probally not even blood or HIV infected blood

im sorry for ranting, but my head is close to exploding after today and its a big lift getting it off my chest.

[Guest mind_over_matter]

Hi there...sounds like you're under a lot of stress at the moment and you're OCD is trying to sneak up on you when you least need it...which is normally the case from my experiences too. Your fears sound very similar to many OCD sufferers so..in some ways, you can feel reassured that you are "normal" Please don't worry about it, it couldn't have done you any harm what so ever, even if it was your worst fear, blood. You should however discuss this fear with your partner, and let her know that you are concerned and stressed about this incident. She'll be able to put your mind at ease..which is exactly what is playing tricks on you...as I can tell you are a rational thinker that knows there is absolutely nothing to be worried about. Take a deep breath and speak to her about what you're concerned about. It really helps put things in perspective after talking.

[Guest nic]

Cam, I am buessing you used the anti bac lotion on your hands? Yes? Well that would have killed ANYTHING on your hands straight away and for a good while later too. Damn those brown and red spots!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[cam]

Hi guys

no the machine was empty, the more i was pushing the button to get some out the more time i spent with the damn machine

[Guest Duckfoot]

Hi Cam,

I know you will already know this, as HIV has been a massive problem for you, so you've been through all of the possible contamination risks etc, but i'm going to point it out again, coz it's kinda important.

Prolonged exposure to mysterious red/brown dots can, in fact, put you at risk of TOTAL OCD OVERLOAD!!!!!

Just forget about it hin, they could have been anything, i know you're stressed but your parents will be going home soon and you can relax again, do a little something to take your mind off it, a walk, a nice hot bath, an afternoon of ps3, whatever you like, just relax and distract and you will be fine xx

[cam]

Hey Duckfoot

hows it going mate?

thanks for your words, i took up your advice and demanded an hour of me time today and powerd up the PS3

the distraction did help, i cant wait to have some alone time. But i know when i get it i will want company. Cant win huh!

[cam]

On the same theme something else has happend

do you ever get it when you know if you put yourself in a certain situation that you will get triggerd?

What i mean is that when i walked out of my flat to a takeaway car i walked barefoot. Straight away my mind was like "your gonna convince yourself that you walked onto a infected needle"

when i walked back in i got a piece of stone or something in my foot that caused abit of pain. And guess what i thought!!

[Guest SSRI]

Hi Cam. I fully sympathise with you. On a note of caution though, part of the process to beat this problem, is to stop seeking reassurance. I know this from personal experience. It is extremely difficult not to, but that is what has to be done

[Guest Duckfoot]

Hi Cam things are going good for me thanks good for you deciding to play the ps3, we all need to take some time out to do things we enjoy!

i knowc what you mean about wanting me time, and then feeling lonely, my boyfriend works shifts and i sometimes think it'll be great to have the house to myself for a few hours, so i can just totally slob out and do whatever i want, and then when the time comes, i miss having him around and get really bored and lonely very quickly! lol

i find that when i know things are going to trigger my ocd, it is easier to lable them as that and forget about it, its when things hit me out of the blue that i don't have so much luck with!

How are you doing today? i hope you're feeling better

[cam]

Heeey

Its like the P!nk song isnt it "leave me alone im lonely" always reminds me of how i get

Im not so bad today, drained totally of all the constant entertaining and my parents are quite demanding. They makeout they dont mind watching a movie or something but always want to do something, when i do suggest something they moan that they are walking to much!! Grrrr

My fella is back for abit later, so atleast i can get a hug