Crying right now

[Guest TangoGirl]

Hi Gemzi,

I'm sorry to hear you're feeling so upset. I know how you feel. I live in Scotland too. Can I ask which city you live in? You don't need to tell me.

I know what it feels like to have no friends. I was almost in exactly your position a few months ago, (with no friends here but a boyfriend in London).

If you ever need anyone to talk to or are just very bored, you can contact me.

Hope you feel better soon.

TG x

[Gemzi3]

Hey TG

It's a town near Glasgow x

I suppose it's just a bad day I'm having, but the what ifs are there, and I try to say to myself, it's just a thought, just OCD, but it's hard to believe sometimes.

I always wished I had a group of close friends, but social situations now sometimes make me feel uncomfortable. It's hard when your older and out of school to make friends

Just wanna have my zest for life back and not this guilt and punishing myself but because I can't get an answer, this feels like the only option.

[Guest TangoGirl]

Hi Gemzi,

I live near Glasgow too, (in Ayrshire). I know exactly how you feel, and wish I had a group of close friends too.

I'm sorry to say that I don't really know what to suggest, except that if you ever need someone to talk to, I'm here for you.

TG x

[Gemzi3]

Thanks for that, feel free to pm me

Not sure if anyone can give me advice as its a true thought

[Ashley]

I try to say to myself, it's just a thought, just OCD, but it's hard to believe sometimes.

I think at first this is a really good approach, it helps identify what the OCD thoughts are, but eventually it may in itself become an unhelpful compulsion which offers reassurance. In the end I think the approach to take is slightly different one where you almost call the bluff of the thoughts.

[Gemzi3]

Hmmm I do see what you mean, like a distraction.

Its hard but I first was going down the route of forgiving myself, but, the probem is, if i dont know if I did it or not, is forgiving myself the best treatment plan?

x

[Guest TangoGirl]

Thanks for that, feel free to pm me

Not sure if anyone can give me advice as its a true thought

People can still give you advice when it's a true thought.

TG x

[Gemzi3]

Bad today, how do you go on in life without feeling guilty

Thats like saying oh if you kill someone, then u need to move on cause you cant spend your life feeling guilty?

You should be punished!

[Guest TangoGirl]

Thats like saying oh if you kill someone, then u need to move on cause you cant spend your life feeling guilty?

You should be punished!

Are you talking about what I said?

[Gemzi3]

Yea because the thought is true

[Guest TangoGirl]

Oh I'm sorry. I wasn't trying to offend you. I just meant that people can still help you when you feel hopeless, I.e. have these thoughts.

[Guest TangoGirl]

Maybe I shouldn't come on here anymore. All I do is upset people.

[Gemzi3]

Its not you at all, my thought is a true thought,so I find the 4 steps etc very hard

[Guest TangoGirl]

Ok, good. I thought the "you should be punished" and the comments before it were aimed at me.

[Gemzi3]

no....just myself x

[Guest TangoGirl]

no....just myself x

Ahh ok. I'm so glad, as I was worried I had upset you!

How are you feeling today?

TG x

[taurean]

Lynn you are so right and what you say is exactly what my therapist tells me, and she is absolutely right.OCD thoughts are NOT our thoughts,athey do not reflect the inner psyche we have, and it is important to remember this.

I take the view that I am most vulnerable to an OCD lapse when I actually feel stronger, because the OCD is a viciuos enemy and it will seek out an opportunity; I am, sadly , very vulnerable when I take a break from my work (which forms a distraction). so unfortunately instead of being able to relax adn unwind, I state ruminating and get constantly whirring very unpleasant repetitive thoughts - I call this a thought loop - and it does bring me down untll I can distract myself and take my focus away from them, then they ease,

[Gemzi3]

Yea, when im feeling happier the thoughts tend to come back worse, like they dont want me to be happy, or that feeling sad and depressed is the "norm".

Im trying out the 4 steps, got the book but yet to finish it, but i dont know, i find it hard because alot of the time they refer to not doing the compulsion, is my compulsion is ruminating, its very hard to realise im doing it before its too late

[Guest Sanji]

This is exactly what I get. It almost tries to trick me into thinking I don't like the things that I enjoy the most.

[Guest Jem86]

Hiya,

Just been reading the posts and I completely relate to what you're going through. I know exactly what you mean when you were saying that when you have a good day you feel guilty for it, and the thoughts come back.

After suffering for ages I went to a psychologist and it was such a releif of pain and provided the reassurance that I wasnt an awful person. Since then Ive found its important to try and remember each day that they are just thoughts, and when you do get that positive thought and realisation hold on to it for as long as you can and keep pusing through.

Ive heard that CBT is really brilliant and there are some good books out there too.

Hope you're feeling better :original:

[Gemzi3]

Really insightful comments and hope that this thread can help others.

What to do about the 4 steps, very hard when a thought has some truth feel abit stuck

[Guest cal92]

I hope you feel better. In many books, it often explains how OCD can make you feel like a bad person. But the truth is you're not a bad person at all, you're a good person suffering from a bad illness. You should forgive yourself, as like many OCD sufferers, you haven't done anything wrong, it's just your mind trying to make you think you have. I have friends, but pretty much none of them know about my illness, neither do my parents, so I know how it feels to feel lonely and alone in this, but there'll always be people on this forum that know how you're feeling and are willing to help x