Guest sid3rocks22 Posted March 30, 2016 Share Posted March 30, 2016 Redditers I have been on my gap year and it has been 9months alone now. During these months I picked uo depression. This lead to some things that have made me suffer miserabely. I remember watching criminal minds. It was an episode about paedophiles and suddenly a thought popped into my head if I am one too? I brushed it off but it stayed with me for almost a month. During this time I questioned everything. If I was a serial killer? A rapist and much more. But these thoughts subsided in a while but an evem worse thing took its place. I started worrying if I was into incest. Whenever I looked at my mom I started breathing heavy my chest closed uo and I felt like crying. I would go to the bathroom drop my pants and look if my dick was responding. Whenever I watched porn this thoughtalways nagged me I I would like to to this to a familybmember or not. This went on for months. I got more anxious. And felt utterly crushed. Ome day I was alone and was thinking abiut this and kind of convinced myself it was all in my mind. But then I saw my mothers jeans. I thought oh my god do I want to smell it. I pondered in this thought for 15 minutes and I started crying. I btought the jeans to the drawing room and got angry I felt like a oerverted *******.half an hour passed and I thought I will smell it to prove myself this is nothing. I did and I almost puked. I kept crying fir another hour till my parents got home.I went on the internet and came across accounts of people with similar stories of wierd urges anxiety depression because of pure ocd which has all the symptoms I experience But I still think I am a psycopath. I mean did I enjoy the thought of smelling my moms jeans. Did I really want to have sex with my own mother? I really need someone to help me as I have been crying for 3 days now. Today my mom told me she is feeling lonely nowadays which made dme feel so bad. I have not been talking to her for the last few months properly. She is getting lonely as my dad is usually out. I dont want this ti ruin my life. I want some answers. Am I really a perverted guy? Please help me guys I cant cope with this anymore. I wat these ******* thoughts gone. Please Link to comment
Symps07 Posted April 1, 2016 Share Posted April 1, 2016 You need to go about your life as normal. Don't engage with these thoughts, just let them be. Take a look at the main OCD UK in this link - website http://www.ocduk.org/ocd Educate yourself on OCD & see which parts relate to you & your thoughts/fears. Don't seek assurance, it's another compulsion. Stay strong :original: Link to comment
Guest vijay Posted May 11, 2016 Share Posted May 11, 2016 hello, my name is vijay, im new to this forum. i have OCD, i suffer from it. several months ago i started to wash my hands a lot, i just washed my hands again if i touched the bathroom sink basin, and if water splashed on my arm i would need to wash my arm then i would have to wash the other arm, and it was extremely bad, sometimes it would make me want to cry but i couldnt cry, because of another problem i have had of suppressing things from a young age. my ocd is up and down, one day its better, the next day its bad again. my other ocd problem was walking over things then walking back over them then walking around them instead of over them. i have wanted to just cry, i was standing praying for 5 hours because of an ocd problem, it just caused anxiety and i just wanted to cry so desperately. being unwell, has made my ears very sensitive to loud noises as another problem, when i hear a loud noise unexpectedly, or just loud noise it makes my anxiety jump and it takes some time for it to go down. im a little nervous and scared to talk to someone, but if if you would like to say hello to me, i can say hi back. i havent had friends i was a loner, but i try be around family to help me interact. Link to comment
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