OCD or something else? Need help

[Guest Adam78]

Hello all,

I feel really stupid for posting on these forums but I'm trying to find some support and guidance from others who may have experienced similar problems.

I've had OCD for a while, at least I think it's OCD. I have the ritual things where I wash my hands a lot, move things in my bedroom into certain places so they look right, do certain things a number of times because if I don't then I feel like something bad will happen.

I've been able to cope with it, I've actually been trying to break out of my OCD habits and just accept things as they are without having to worry about them.

However, I've got myself stuck in a really annoying pattern with something. The other day I got a new wallet for my birthday because my old one was broken. The wallet which someone bought me was the same brand and style of the old one, almost identical apart from a slight colour difference.

For some reason and I know it sounds crazy, but I don't like it and I have this fear of it in a way just because it's new and slightly different, but part of me wants to use it because it's a birthday present but I just feel like it's evil in a way and I can't stop worrying about it.

I don't know whether to just keep using it and hope I get used to it or to use another one? Since I've had OCD I've always been a bit weird about the things I buy, like they can't be a certain colour or have certain characteristics, even if I like something which I want to buy, I will purposely avoid buying it for stupid reasons which isn't a normal way to think.

I feel like if I get a different wallet then I'll feel okay after a few days even know the person who bought me the wallet for my birthday will be really disappointed that I'm not using the one they got me.

Can anyone relate to this and maybe help me out? Again I know it sounds stupid but I really need some help with this.

Thanks,

Adam

[Guest BadgerFox]

Greetings, Adam! Going to hop in and reply here, although I'm not a (very) young person, since there's been no other reply. Don't feel stupid, first off .

We are not medical professionals here, so it may be best you ask a doctor to diagnose you properly? But the actions you describe certainly sound very OCD-like, and are similar to the compulsions that many people on these forums do.

It sounds like your symptoms are fairly mild so far, but now is a good time to learn how to manage them, because they could get worse. The average age that OCD comes on at is late teens.

A key thing about OCD is 'if you give it an inch, it will take a mile'! Every time you give in the uneasy feeling that something bad will happen if you don't tidy/arrange/count etc, you're literally training your brain to believe that this vague unproven fear is real. If you carry on doing these compulsive actions it's possible to end up at a very unwell stage where you're non-functional and panicking all day and almost 100% believe that terrible disasters are going to happen because you didn't spend all day lining up your magazine collection in alphabetical order or whatever.

Remember: nothing bad ever actually happens if you resist doing a checking/tidying/counting/any other compulsion. It's always safe to quit doing them.

Specifically with the wallet issue, you MUST keep using the wallet you don't like. You might feel uncomfy at first, but this is a normal part of re-training your brain out of OCD thinking-habits. You know logically that the colour of your wallet has ZERO effect on bad things happening, right? The world just doesn't work that way. So you need to act on what you logically know, not on what you feel - and eventually, you'll become happier and the wallet won't bother you. Same goes for the other compulsive OCD-like actions you list. Try to phase out doing these.

Are you able to grab some more information about how OCD works? There are some brilliant Youtube videos atm (the entire 'OCD Stories' series is very detailed, but some of the shorter ones about common OCD symptoms might be useful?)

Edited May 18, 2016 by BadgerFox