'Just right' OCD

[kaheath80]

I have many different types of OCD. One of them is what is called, from what I've read, 'just right' OCD, where there is no obsessive thought but rather an urge leading to a compulsion. Some examples:

1. If I touch something with one hand or foot I often have to touch the same thing with the other. Not all the time, but often. This is usually not too bad as I just do it and no one really notices, but it can cause problems. The other day I accidentally burned my left thumb with the iron and had to then burn my right one. A few months ago on the tube I accidentally touched a guy's leg with one hand and had to fight the urge not to touch it again with the other.

2. In a meeting a few months ago a colleague had drawn some arrows and coloured in all but one of them. I felt so anxious that eventually I had to snatch the paper off her in the middle of the meeting and colour in the arrow.

3. Today in another meeting there was a Word document on the screen and the cursor was blinking in a certain place, my OCD decided it didn't like the position of it and it made me so anxious that I had to stop my manager in the middle of the meeting and ask him to move it.

4. When I take things from an identical selection I.e. a yogurt from the fridge, i often take one, put one back and do it again and again until it feels right.

Does anyone else have experience with this type of OCD? When I got diagnosed the psychiatrist seemed a bit confused by it, telling me I should resist it and see that nothing bad happens. But I don't think anything bad will happen, it's not like I think someone will die or anything, it just feels unbearable. Like if you can't scratch an itch. Is it important to try and resist the compulsions? If so how, given I can't use the 'let's try it and see that nothing bad happens' method? Or does it not really matter that I have these types of compulsions as they are less 'harmful' than other OCD symptoms? Is this just something some people with OCD have to accept living with?

[Em24]

I would say it's more 'lets leave it and see the urge get less and less noticeable.' I've had similar myself in the past. Just resist the urge and it does become less noticeable x

[PolarBear]

First off, there's always an obsession present with OCD. It may be fleeting but it's there.

You have to decide if it's causing you enough problems, interfering with your daily life, to warrant a change.

Burning your other finger was over the top. Interrupting meetings to do a compulsion is also not great.

[kaheath80]

Thanks both. I guess it's fairly minor compared to many of my other OCD symptoms but you're right about the impact it's having lately.

I've resisted it in the past and it's been ok but next time the urge is there just as strong. Does it really get less the more I resist doing these things?

[PolarBear]

Yeah but you have to do it continually over a length of time. I'm talking weeks, if not months. You won't change overnight. After you start resisting your compulsions it is normal for it to get even harder to resist for a time before it gets better.

[kaheath80]

Thank you. Feeling a bit overwhelmed at the moment with the large number of things I'm supposed to be resisting.

[PolarBear]

You can do them one at a time. You don't have to tackle the whole lot all at once. That's too much for anyone.

[kaheath80]

Thanks. My friend said the same thing when I got upset about all this last night.

[onepunch]

You can look at it like this: Always go towards the anxiety, not away from it. Example - Feeling anxious because one of the arrows are not colored. Normal OCD response would be to color it, which you did. That's moving away from the anxiety. The proper response would be to leave it uncolored and stay with the anxiety until it fades. This can be applied to any "Just right" OCD situation or any OCD situation for that matter. So try not to look at it as "tackling everything at once", because that can be overwhelming.Instead, look at each of these situations as it comes up as an opportunity to move towards the anxiety. Every chance you get, always go towards the anxiety, never away from it. 

 

 

Edited July 22, 2016 by onepunch
typo

[kaheath80]

Thank you- that's really useful.

I decided to try and start fighting the 'just right' OCD today because it's minor compared to a lot of my OCD symptoms. However, it may be minor but it's also affecting me all day. Like first thing this morning I read the news headlines as usual and usually I take it in terms with my hands pressing the arrow on the remote control to move to the next story and I resisted that and used one hand. Then I opened a door with one hand and avoided touching it with the other hand. There are things like this that I do without thinking. Throughout the day I'm constantly adjusting the position of my screen at work, it never feels right. At one point I made myself not move it but I think I did it other times subconsciously. Just now I did an online shopping list and added 5 bananas to the list by pressing the + arrow with each thumb alternately. Again I did it without thinking.

When I consciously resist these things, it feels pretty bad. My friend at work said today that touching things with both hands isn't really causing anyone problems so maybe I don't need to worry. But like we said earlier, there are times that this type of OCD does cause me problems. And I'm assuming that I can't just resist the times it's a big problem. Because if I'm still doing minor 'just right' compulsions, it will be harder to resist the times it's a major problem, presumably? I need to resist them all or not at all?

[PolarBear]

There is the concern that things will get worse. It's always easier to deal with compulsions when they are not a big deal and before they become entrenched.

Don't worry about not catching yourself every time. That's okay. As long as you are moving forward and trying.

[kaheath80]

Thank you.

[paradoxer]

Remember kakheath that paradoxically 'just right' is just wrong.