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Breaking, Damaging or Scratching objects


Guest Bluheela

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Guest Bluheela

Hi Ya'll I'm new here (first post).

For years I have had an obsession with Perfectionism - so all my items have to line up without breakages, scratches, dents or damage - House, Car, Laptops, TVs - you name it - anything new.  If I do find imperfections I tend to escalate to a high level of anxiety quickly.  And I will ruminate about the loss for long periods of time.

But in life nothing is perfect I know.  I have done CBT for years in relation to this type of OCD obsession but every now and again it rears it's ugly head as if I have forgotten how to deal with it.  It seems that the obsession for perfection does die down if you can forget about it.  But how do you forget about an obsession that constantly besieges you and doesn't leave your free thinking alone?

 

Question: How do you guys handle this type of obsession for your things, objects and gadgets?  Is it something us OCDers will always have to put up with?

 

 

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4 hours ago, Bluheela said:

But how do you forget about an obsession that constantly besieges you and doesn't leave your free thinking alone?

Simples... (well not simple to do)... face the OCD head on and expose yourself to the thing your obsessions fear.    So in your case purposely have imperfections in things you normally like to be perfect.

 

4 hours ago, Bluheela said:

us OCDers

I am going to add that word to the swear filter, I hate it...   I for one am not an OCDer, it suggests that OCD is some kind of club we are proud to wear the badge for :a1_cheesygrin:

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Guest Bluheela

Thanks Ashley for the prompt reply.

You'll have to forgive me for the abbreviation/slang - I'm a writer and proudly Australian and I like to have a bit of fun with words and to be a bit irreverent at times.  Regardless I respect your decision to add the word to the swear bin. Thks and this is my first post (LOL).

Back to topic - I can even get obsessions where I think I have broken or imperfected something and I haven't.  So I can't expose myself to that fear - instead I get a lot of round and round my head obsessional (anxiety) stuff - which is quite uncomfortable.  To me it seems that the need for perfection in all areas is tantamount and the mind struggles to cope with this.  I think this is the condition - I have the tools (most of) and take good meds.  Maybe I just have to live with the disorder.

Anybody, any ideas?

 

:)

 

 

 

 

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Guest Bluheela

There is a very funny side to this though & I am not always afflicted by it (occasionally) - And I always find the humor in a situation once the wretched thing has de-escalated.  For those of us who try to maintain perfection with objects we need to be mindful that we have one heck of a blind spot operating.

What is it you say?  How many people have a perfect body? - None of us and yet we demand perfection in objects and chase the holy grail and you would be amazed at how much grief some people have when the slightest of scratch appears on the casing of their IPHONE 6 (LOL) - and a lot of them don't have OCD???????.

 

I rest my case

 

 

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On 25/08/2016 at 12:00, Bluheela said:

Back to topic - I can even get obsessions where I think I have broken or imperfected something and I haven't.  So I can't expose myself to that fear - instead I get a lot of round and round my head obsessional (anxiety) stuff - which is quite uncomfortable.  To me it seems that the need for perfection in all areas is tantamount and the mind struggles to cope with this.  I think this is the condition - I have the tools (most of) and take good meds.  Maybe I just have to live with the disorder.

Anybody, any ideas?

The important first thing, for me, is to understand that this theme is, as usual with OCD, UNWANTED by you the sufferer. And it takes away enjoyment from your life and wastes time.

The disorder has a core foundation, forming an unwanted obsession around a flawed or false core belief and tossing in fear or revulsion to sustain it. 

Recognising this as the devious work of OCD, expressed through our normal mental channels, allows us to see it for what it is, how it operates and triggers disorder - maintaining it through deploying compulsions. 

My therapist explained why the OCD distortions stick around. 

Consider our thinking in the same way as the field of view that we see in focus. 

The obsession slips into our field of view, but instead of being noticed, processed, then resolved and slipping into our peripheral vision, then resolving away, our brain LOCKS and the obsession stays in focus and won't resolve. 

We need to use CBT to unpick the lock that stops the intrusions resolving away. 

For me, there are three main ways. 

Tackling the compulsions that keep the obsession alive. Gradually weaning ourselves off them. 

Using sessions of exposure and response prevention in a graded hierarchical way, to take the anxiety out of the intrusions and render them benign. 

Otherwise, leaving the intrusions be, not trying to "get rid of"  them or " neutralise " them (only makes them stronger) and refocusing away to something involved and beneficial - preferably what you actually want to be doing. 

Based on my own journey through treatment, I don't think CBT may be successful unless all these things are understood and practised.

After all, obsessions + compulsions = disorder. 

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Guest Bluheela

TYVM - Well put.

Are you able to give an example of ERP being applied to any OCD Obsession/Compulsion and working, any type is fine?

I ask because a Psychiatrist once got me to do this ERP for OCD and it failed - i.e.  I told him I had this same thematic phobic fear of Damaging things (anything) across the board in all areas of my life - so he said do an action multiple times e.g. 20 times for each obsessional fear to prove that I was not damaging something e.g. putting the bonnet down on an expensive car to prove that I was not damaging the bonnet.  So here I was opening and shutting the bonnet 20 times - found that just filled me with Fear (at the time).  I soon found another psychiatrist/psychologist who told me that that method (ERP) would not work for me and would only make me worse.  So I am interested to hear if the method is flawless or does ERP have it's own limitations.  I am not afraid to stand in the way of fear - I think having OCD teaches you to be pretty resilient.

I also understand the hierarchical basis (theoretical) to building up on fears for the ERP application, method wise.  I have taken on this disorder since 1993. Thanks Again for giving the time.................

 

Edited by Bluheela
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What would be better is exposing yoursrlf to the possibility that you fo damage things. But you can't do any compulsions after. That's the other part of ERP you must do.

So for instance, open and close the bonnet twenty times but you're not allowed to look for damage. You then walk away, unsure if you've damaged it or not. Your anxiety will go sky high but it will come back down without having to do compulsions.

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