Self care during harder times

[biscuitcat]

Hello All,

I wanted to make a post with some suggestions with how we can care for ourselves when we are having a hard week with anxiety, stress, depression, ocd, etc etc.

Sometimes we just need to switch off from OCD. Yes you might be having a hard time mentally, but it certainly doesn't mean that's all you should think about.

 

Sometimes the best way to deal with OCD is to address external factors.

Are there any external stresses in my life at the moment?

Am I getting enough sleep?

Could I be eating a healthier diet, and more water?

 

Sometimes we need to address these things in order to make us feel better physically and mentally. 

I've had a stressful week, so what am I going to do about it?

Make myself a hot cup of tea, put on my favourite tracksuit bottoms, put on one of my favourite films, get some life admin done so I don't have any 'excess' and try to relax.

How else can we make ourselves feel better that doesn't focus on our mental health, but aids it in another way.

[PolarBear]

Taurean taught me the acronym R.E.D.S. Relaxation, exercise, diet, sleep. Take care of those four things and you're putting yourself in a good position to tackle OCD.

[ohwhyhello]

I have found, when in the throes of OCD, "grooming" can really help. I'm naturally a brush-your-teeth-for-20-seconds kind of girl; I usually slap on moisturiser once a century, and eat whatever crappy food is placed in front me; OCD always made me think there were more important things to do (i.e. "figuring out" if my worries were "true", analysing, researching); like until I knew what was wrong with me, I couldn't waste my time on menial cosmetic niceties. Once I started to consistently resist compulsions, I found investing a bit in my own appearance made me feel more worthwhile, especially if consistently applied. I now brush my teeth with a three-minute timer, put on three different face creams each morning and night, and only indulge in something greasy once a week. It makes me feel more in control and more "worth it". Plus, the resulting compliments don't exactly hurt either.

Edited February 16, 2017 by ohwhyhello

[biscuitcat]

6 minutes ago, ohwhyhello said:

I have found, when in the throes of OCD, "grooming" can really help. I'm naturally a brush-your-teeth-for-20-seconds kind of girl; I usually slap on moisturiser once a century, and eat whatever crappy food is placed in front me; OCD always made me think there were more important things to do (i.e. "figuring out" if my worries were "true", analysing, researching); like until I knew what was wrong with me, I couldn't waste my time on menial cosmetic niceties.  Once I started to consistently resist compulsions, I found investing a bit in my own appearance made me feel more worthwhile, especially if consistently applied. I now brush my teeth with a three-minute timer, put on three different face creams each morning and night, and only indulge in something greasy once a week. It makes me feel more in control and more "worth it". Plus, the resulting compliments don't exactly hurt either.

Great advice there! I also find this makes me feel better. I'll normally force myself to get a manicure, or put on a face mask.

I don't trust hairdressers to cut my fringe, so just now I did it myself. Makes me feel so much better

[taurean]

We can help ourselves to feel better just by dressing nicely, putting on the moisturiser (Nivea for men version)  smelling nice and maybe a little touch of jewellery - I have a beautiful tiny silver horn on a pendant chain I put on today teamed up with my beautiful Accurist retirement present watch, and some expensive male perfume. 

I felt a million dollars. And that was to visit my chiropodist and local pub.

 

Also some quality me time and a few minutes just to relax and unwind help. 

Edited February 16, 2017 by taurean
corrections

[Wonderer]

I love old trackies and a film ??

I think calling a friend for a chat when you don't feel like chatting is usually the best time to do it! I find it doesn't be long before I'm laughing or so lost in conversation I forget I didn't want to talk in the first place! 

I've had a rubbish couple of days, time of the month grrrrr. So today I baked with my son, something fun to do and fed my cravings at the same time lol!xx

[taurean]

Yep a film is good. Get the popcorn and the wine out. 

But try the wonderful smooth classics at 7 on Classic fm - it's on now till 8 pm. So relaxing. 

 

[biscuitcat]

3 minutes ago, Wonderer said:

I love old trackies and a film ??

I've had a rubbish couple of days, time of the month grrrrr. So today I baked with my son, something fun to do and fed my cravings at the same time lol!xx

You need yourself some snacks and a big sweatshirt to go with that!

 

[Wonderer]

Haha absolutely! And lots and lots of sympathy is nice too ??

[kaheath80]

One of the things suggested for depression is to make a crisis box filled with photos of things you like, messages from friends, maybe films or music you like, cuddly toys etc. So when you feel really bad you can use the box and do something nice. I have been wondering if something like that could help in times of extreme OCD panic?

[kittypurry]

36 minutes ago, kaheath80 said:

One of the things suggested for depression is to make a crisis box filled with photos of things you like, messages from friends, maybe films or music you like, cuddly toys etc. So when you feel really bad you can use the box and do something nice. I have been wondering if something like that could help in times of extreme OCD panic?

This is a fantactic idea. 

[taurean]

Learn the basics of mindfulness. 

In a true state of mindfulness our focus is purely in the present, in the moment. 

Mindfulness operates within the benign "being"  part of the brain, as opposed to OCD which functions within the active "doing"  part of the brain, which is constantly seeking solutions to problems, in the now, the past or perceived for the future. 

Mindfulness is not the complex science made out sometimes - and finding a portal into the state is actually as simple as taking a walk and focusing on what you see hear and smell. 

Edited February 16, 2017 by taurean
typo

[kaheath80]

18 minutes ago, kittypurry said:

This is a fantactic idea. 

?

[taurean]

I have my box all ready to fill

 

[biscuitcat]

We could make our own care packages:

 A box of a slightly luxury tea, a face mask or something calming, lavender oil to put on our pillow, a nice scented candle, nail polish, and of course chocolate.

[Storm]

And maybe a jar of peanut butter too  

[Storm]

Great idea on the self care box. Also a lush bath bomb would be a good one for the box.

[taurean]

I think in my box - which by the way could be "virtual" will be my wonderful pocket digital radio, this brilliant Sony Xperia E4 mobile, a copy of "Nature's Home"  magazine, some guided meditation CDs,  the January edition of Bon Sante magazine I am reading, full of brilliant relaxation and diet ideas,  some of my rings and watches,  and a pair of binoculars for birdwatching. 

 

 

[kaheath80]

All sounds good!

[taurean]

Here is another idea courtesy of snowbear. 

We imagine another box, but this is a strongbox and we are going to imagine dropping all our cares worries and angst and bad memories into this box. 

The box has a one way valve on its opening. We can drop things into it, but they can't come out. 

We can of course work this virtual sin bin however we wish. We can open the box with a key to let selected obsessions out for ERP. 

Or we can allow for certain things only to have access out and only at certain times. 

Or we can gradually assert control over what goes in and what stays in. 

 

Edited February 16, 2017 by taurean
amendment

[Wonderer]

19 minutes ago, biscuitcat said:

We could make our own care packages:

 A box of a slightly luxury tea, a face mask or something calming, lavender oil to put on our pillow, a nice scented candle, nail polish, and of course chocolate.

What a good idea! Think I'll do this at the weekend! Xx

[bruces]

I've always been told by therapists how important sleep is but I'm really struggling with this one as I can't switch my mind off at night and it takes forever to get off,and then I wake several times in the night with anxiety attacks. 

[biscuitcat]

Oh bruces, that's not good! I like to put a few drops of lavender oil on my pillow. It's also good to get a bedtime routine, spending time getting ready for bed, putting clothes away, brushing your teeth etc. Preparing yourself mentally for sleep. 

I bought a new pillow recently, I spent time trying all the pillows in the store and love my new pillow, it's made a huge difference.

[constantworrier1989]

I've recently taken up embroidery, and it's super therapeutic! Like biscuitcat, I've also used lavender oil on my pillow and even a few drops in my shampoo.  

[taurean]

I use special relaxation music that induces sleep, together with a few pages from a happy enjoyable novel. 

Works a treat.