Feeling as though I can't cope at the moment

[BelAnna]

Hello,

I really need some support- I feel as though I can't cope at the moment.

My Gran used to live with us until Friday when she passed away. The lead up to her death and the last few years of her dementia, physically illness and disability have been awful, so was holding her hand as she passed away. My Mum now has a very nasty infection (the GP thinks shingles with cellulitis), which is not responding to tablets- probably caused by being so low from exhaustion with working and looking after my poorly Gran. She may well end up in hospital. On top of this my puppy is unwell and I just feel like I can't cope.

I don't have friends, a job or anything to keep me grounded.

My OCD is going into overdrive and I am panicking all the time. x

[BelAnna]

Thanks Jessie_Loz for the supportive message! Hope your OCD is ok just now xx

[taurean]

Annabel I really feel for you. 

Stress always pushes the OCD button and it can go haywire. 

So maybe your best plan is to try to come to terms with what has happened. 

Our usual first encounter with the loss of a loved one involves a grandparent - and sadly  as people live longer the issues that you have experienced are becoming commonplace. 

Bur how sad that your Mum has become ill as a result. 

Try and see this rationally - perhaps a consequence as you surmise of the stress for caring for your gran. 

Try and take a detached view and practice some simple calming exercises - you can find them freely or if need be I will provide access details. 

We can take a detached view by imagining we are someone else looking from outside at what is happening to us. 

Try that and see how the stress reaction is causing distress and feeding your OCD. 

What's happened is dreadful, but feeling better and facing up to the situation in a practical way is a sensible aim. 

Working on acceptance of what has happened, some relaxation exercises and a determination to get over this and help your Mum will help you too.

It's challenging - we get better at these things as we get older and have more practical experience - but you are not alone, you have new friends here - already including Jess and I - and the community here will provide some succour. 

Meanwhile remember, work on detachment,acceptance of what has happened and easing down the stress by coming to terms with things - then the OCD will hopefully improve