Hello, new to the fourm. Need advice with this new theme. Fear of being drugged or impaired.

[runescape23]

       Hello everyone! I'm currently dealing with a new theme of OCD that I just really cant seem to get ahold of. I've suffered from OCD since I was a child. Some of my themes have been Contamination fears of HIV, compulsive checking and washing, and intrusive thoughts about harming others. These have been tackled, and dealt with for the most part. However this new theme as been extremely exhausting and I feel like I'm alone in handling this.

       I keep having these irrational fears that the things I eat or touch will have drugs like LSD or Prescription medication in them or on them. For example; I cant drink my Gatorade in my cooler because its near my moms beers and maybe the alcohol got inside some of my safe drinks. I cant drink caffeine,food left unattended, or anything that doesn't seem like its apart of the food. I cant even go through some drive through anymore because the person inside could have spiked it. I even had a panic attack because a stranger shook my hand, and maybe he was trying to drug me with LSD on his hand. (Which I know is irrational and unrealistic)

       I'm seeing a Specialist on OCD on the 4th of April, but I was wondering if there was advice anyone could give me. Maybe some ERP or CBT tips I can do myself in till I go and see her. Also if you've dealt with this theme before, id love to hear your story and how you conquered this. Just knowing I'm not alone in this would bring me Great relief. I'm truly interested in hearing my fellow OCD sufferers and ex sufferers stories.

Can't wait to give my own support to you guys. I truly appreciate you taking your time to read this.  -Runescape pleb

 

Edited March 27, 2017 by runescape23
Spelling errors

[PolarBear]

Hi and welcome to the forum.

You are most certainly not alone. I've come across several people over the years here on the forum with the exact same intrusive thoughts as you.

As far as what you can do, because I guarantee its going to come up in therapy, is you need to identify the compulsions you are doing and start working on cutting them back and stopping them. No great surprise there. All the compulsions you do, like avoiding certain drinks and foods, avoiding going to a drive through, are making your situation worse. Compulsions don't solve anything. They reinforce in your mind that there was a problem in the first place when there wasn't. Cutting back and eliminating compulsions is the way forward.

OCD can be very convincing but it lies, all the time. The only way to prove to yourself that drinks and food is okay is by eating and drinking, going against the intrusive thoughts.

[runescape23]

Hey Polarbear, thanks for the reply. I really appreciate it a lot. I feel like a giant coward because I've been doing what OCD wants. I've been doing so much avoidance and really nothing to do to fight this. You gave me an idea though. I'm going to write down my fears and the compulsions I do and try to start with the smaller ones, and work my way up to the harder ones.. Also it might help me of labeling the not so obvious compulsions I do both mentally and physically. I just feel like I let my self down by playing OCD's game. and I just feel like giving up and just dying. This isn't healthy thinking, but I'm going to really try starting now to just face this. Im just really scared, and facing them seems near impossible. Thank you for taking your time to reply, and I'm going to do what you've told me. I just need to be brave.                        

[runescape23]

I just wish this thing was gone, and everyone who sufferers and has this would just not have this horrible thing anymore.