hospital admissions..

[PhilM]

I want to post about my experiences as I don't want to hijack someone else's thread but I'm not sure if it's a good idea or not.

[OceanDweller]

10 minutes ago, PhilM said:

I want to post about my experiences as I don't want to hijack someone else's thread but I'm not sure if it's a good idea or not.

I would advocate you doing just that Phil. I feel (and I would, in the past, have included myself in this) that a lot of folk perceive admission to a psychiatric unit as entering some kind of oasis where all ills can be cured. Psyche wards are often scary and terribly tedious.

[PhilM]

Thank you OD. I was a bit concerned about freaking anyone out...

My first voluntary admission was in 1997 when I lived in North Wales. The unit was fairly new but mixed - i.e. people with lots of different conditions ranging obviously in my case OCD to anorexia and psychotic conditions. I was in a ward with three other men and my only privacy was a screen round my bed. I spent three weeks in the unit and in that time I received NO treatment whatsoever - apart from pills. The non-medical staff were patronising and intrusive and while I was there I actually self-harmed which I had never done before. There was absolutely nothing available to distract oneself - apart from jigsaw puzzles which are not really my thing.

Fast forward to 2005. I was admitted - again voluntarily - in Brighton. A private room but with a door with a window anyone could look through and the same scenario - a mixed ward with lots of different conditions which can be extremely scary for anxiety sufferers. I am not being at all disrespectful to people with conditions like schizophrenia but some of the behaviour I witnessed was extremely distressing - especially violent behaviour or patients being restrained (horrible to experience) by several members of staff.

The ward was locked most of the time as some of the patients were sectioned and couldn't leave the ward so even though I was a voluntary patient I had to ask permission for them to open the door regularly. I felt most of the nursing staff were uncaring and uninterested apart from the day the psychiatrist was doing "his rounds". My ruminations and distress were as bad - if not worse - in hospital as they were at home and again I received no treatment. Most people seemed to spend all day in the smelly smoking room which didn't change even when they removed the TV to discourage the heavy smoking.

I know there have been changes in in-patient psychiatric care in the last 50 years - and maybe in the last 12 years since my last admission - BUT for me the admissions were no respite from my condition and in some respects made it worse because I had MORE time on my hands to ruminate. Excuse the capital letters but I wanted to emphasise those two points.

These were just some of my experiences and others may have had - and I'd be pleased if they did - more positive admissions. I feel it is a decision that is in your hands - i.e. without being sectioned - with the guidance of a competent mental health professional but it is something that has to have a lot of thought put into it. Even in "crisis" I sometimes feel like I was better off at home.

Best wishes, Phil.

Edited April 24, 2017 by PhilM
adding a bit

[OceanDweller]

9 hours ago, PhilM said:

Thank you OD. I was a bit concerned about freaking anyone out...

My first voluntary admission was in 1997 when I lived in North Wales. The unit was fairly new but mixed - i.e. people with lots of different conditions ranging obviously in my case OCD to anorexia and psychotic conditions. I was in a ward with three other men and my only privacy was a screen round my bed. I spent three weeks in the unit and in that time I received NO treatment whatsoever - apart from pills. The non-medical staff were patronising and intrusive and while I was there I actually self-harmed which I had never done before. There was absolutely nothing available to distract oneself - apart from jigsaw puzzles which are not really my thing.

Fast forward to 2005. I was admitted - again voluntarily - in Brighton. A private room but with a door with a window anyone could look through and the same scenario - a mixed ward with lots of different conditions which can be extremely scary for anxiety sufferers. I am not being at all disrespectful to people with conditions like schizophrenia but some of the behaviour I witnessed was extremely distressing - especially violent behaviour or patients being restrained (horrible to experience) by several members of staff.

The ward was locked most of the time as some of the patients were sectioned and couldn't leave the ward so even though I was a voluntary patient I had to ask permission for them to open the door regularly. I felt most of the nursing staff were uncaring and uninterested apart from the day the psychiatrist was doing "his rounds". My ruminations and distress were as bad - if not worse - in hospital as they were at home and again I received no treatment. Most people seemed to spend all day in the smelly smoking room which didn't change even when they removed the TV to discourage the heavy smoking.

I know there have been changes in in-patient psychiatric care in the last 50 years - and maybe in the last 12 years since my last admission - BUT for me the admissions were no respite from my condition and in some respects made it worse because I had MORE time on my hands to ruminate. Excuse the capital letters but I wanted to emphasise those two points.

These were just some of my experiences and others may have had - and I'd be pleased if they did - more positive admissions. I feel it is a decision that is in your hands - i.e. without being sectioned - with the guidance of a competent mental health professional but it is something that has to have a lot of thought put into it. Even in "crisis" I sometimes feel like I was better off at home.

Best wishes, Phil.

This is brave and informative posting Phil. ?

[PhilM]

Thank you OD. How you doing?

[OceanDweller]

19 minutes ago, PhilM said:

Thank you OD. How you doing?

I'm in a really good place thanks Phil. Couple of physical health issues that are in the process of being treated (well I am 40 now!). And your good self?

[PhilM]

I'm OK generally - still have some withdrawal issues going on like this horrible taste in my mouth etc. but this is better than being on a gigantic dose of tranquillisers. I think the last 12 months I've had more realisations about my condition than in the previous 20 years. This is nothing to do with being in or out of therapy - something has simply clicked in my brain. 80/90 per cent of the time I'm not afraid of my thoughts and the irony was that even when I was heavily "sedated" it was the other way round!!?? Bizarre.

Edited April 25, 2017 by PhilM
another spelling mistake!

[PhilM]

Having said about not being afraid of my thoughts most of the time I have to be aware that OCD can wax and wane. Something I've very conscious of.

[PhilM]

I just want to re-iterate after reading another forum user's post that a voluntary psychiatric hospital admission for someone with an anxiety-based condition is something that even in a highly emotional state should be considered very carefully in my opinion.

I found - particularly when I lived in Brighton - that Community Mental Health Teams do not actually want you to go to hospital unless the circumstances really make it necessary. For example, if you are considered a danger to yourself or others. They - again in my experience - prefer to "treat" you at home when you are in "crisis" or at specific locations. Part of the extremely flawed Care in the Community program which began in the 1980s I assume.

There simply aren't that many beds compared to 30 or so years ago and the whole idea of the program was to discharge patients - sometimes after decades of hospitalisation - and reintegrate them into the community with as, a lot of people know, sometimes terrible consequences for former patients and, more rarely, members of the community which the tabloid press usually sensationalise.

Sorry for the tangent - back to my main point. Hospitals wards can be boring, hectic, scary, other patients can be intimidating, cause quite a quick type of "institutionalisation" as you know what time meals are or pills to be taken etc. and I received very little "treatment" but was encouraged to go to the painting class.

Sometimes you lack privacy and wards - showers areas for example - can be pretty dirty. Staff are often dismissive and uninterested and stay in their little cubicle unless something dramatic happens. Do they provide a haven when someone is at their lowest point? I am not sure.

These views are just my own and I'd love for someone to respond with a positive experience to share about a hospital admission - particularly on the NHS.

Best wishes, Phil

Edited April 26, 2017 by PhilM