Weeks of feeling good then a relapse

[Elle101]

Hey guys,

I started writing a post last night but didn't want it to sound like the ramblings of a madwoman. 

I went to my GP and she prescribed a small dose of diazepam which is helping but I've had another relapse.

On the train last night myself and my partner were drinking prosecco and I went to get off the train - I had to squeeze past a man and his child and I can't stop thinking about whether I accidentally touched one of them inappropriately - my boyfriend couldn't see anything as they were in front of him. When I got off the train the man gave me a horrible look and muttered something to me and I just walked on.

Has anyone else had experience of this - I'm always so worried about touching people inappropriately and in my mind I'm always like 'avoid avoid avoid' but I worry that because I was thinking that my brain would send a signal to my hands and do something awful because I'm so against something happening? 

I'm a good person and I don't want to think that I've done something bad and I'm sure I didn't but it's just taking over my life. I worry that the small child will tell his dad I touched him and now there will be a police investigation and I'll have to go through court. 

I've never had any thoughts or feelings about doing this but I always think of the worst case scenario. I just worry I did something without realising. I remember as soon as I walked past them thinking **** what if I've done something, have I done something? 

Can anyone help me please? I'm so sorry I'm going out of my mind. I don't want to lose my friends and family and my partner because of this. 

[OceanDweller]

Hi Elle. Members of the Great British public are an enigma. If I worried each time some random glared or muttered in my direction, I'd never get out of bed. His problem, not yours. Forget it.

[Avo]

I agree with OceanDweller on this, someone was funny at work with me for something I thought was no big deal and neither of us were more 'to blame' if indeed the situation was worthy of 'blame'. I decided she had the problem not me.  People are a law unto themselves, it's his problem not yours.

[PAVLIS97]

The more you get exposed to your fear, the better it's going to be for you in the long run.

Move on from this, remember that your OCD is tricking you into thinking like that.