The responses

[GG150]

Hi as you know am crippled with groinal responses and its all day everyday am fighting it, 

you know its getting that bad, the minute i start to doze and shut my eyes i automatically get a thought and a groinal response and its everytime i get sleepy and doze.

maybe in a way this is good thing as am starting to discover why this is happening.

so may i ask two questions,

the more i do rituals the worse it will get. That true?

also are groinal responses Uncontrollable? 

[PolarBear]

We've been over much of this before. Your problem is you are paying attention to the sensations. Pure and simple. You should be dismissing them as irrelevant. When you do, after a while, they'll start to calm down.

[GG150]

Yes now something new happened and am asking if its totally uncontrollable?

Edited May 28, 2017 by GG150

[PolarBear]

You can't directly stop it, no. They're going to happen. But, pay less and less attention to them and they should start slowing down.

By the way, nothing new has happened. You're getting intrusive thoughts followed by groinal responses. Really, it's the same old, same old.

[GG150]

What i do is when i feel something going to happen i say (nothing to do with me) a a response will happen, i keep doing this then stupidy rather than ignore it, i purposely think of something good for my response and i end up automatically with a bad thought which then i have groinal response by purpose if that makes sense, then it takes ages to fix

Edited May 30, 2017 by GG150

[PolarBear]

Stop trying to fix it. Stop doing anything about it. Get a 'so what' attitude about them. We've talked about this before.

[GG150]

But i did, and i had a one in purpose to fix it but failed. So it was me! And now i cant fix it anymore because i cant. I honestly cant go on like this much longer, i just cant morally accept them and a failed attempt to fix makes it worse 

[PolarBear]

There's nothing moral about them. You might as well be upset that you blink. The groinal responses are a learned behavior because you have OCD. You can unlearn them but that means stop paying attention to them. You can't have a mini freak out session and go in and on about how it's morally wrong in your head and get control over them. You just can't.

[GG150]

So the responses and bad thoughts are automatic and i have no control over them? The anxiety causes the response which slso creates the unwanted thought?

is this correct? 

Edited June 1, 2017 by GG150

[PolarBear]

You do have control over them. You can make them meaningless and appear less often when you stop giving them meaning, stop believing they are immoral and stop paying attention to them.

Everyone gets intrusive thoughts. Because you have OCD, you attach meaning to them and do compulsions, which causes the thoughts to come more often, which bothers you more and leads to more compulsions and so on. Same with the groinal responses. At some point you had an intrusive thought followed by a sensation in the front and you made a connection between the two. You thought one caused the other. The next time you had an intrusive thought, you were so focused on having the sensation that you had one. It snowballed from there. Now your groinal responses are linked to your intrusive thoughts. The ONLY way out is to stop paying attention to them.

[GG150]

Ok i have control over if i make it meanless or not, but do i have control over my thoughts and my response my body makes?

[PolarBear]

You're making this way too complicated. Your thoughts and the associated sensations are only a big deal because you make them a big deal by attaching meaning to them and by doing compulsions. When you stop attaching meaning to them and stop the compulsions they will no longer have the same negative effect on you and they will calm down in frequency. 

You don't seem to get, and you're not alone in this, that YOU are causing the groinal responses. You, through your thinking and behaviors, have caused the sensations to take place when you have intrusive thoughts and for the sensations to be viewed negatively by you. 

People, male and female, get sensations in their groins on a daily basis. But other people don't attach any meaning to them. They treat them like any other sensation anywhere else on their bodies. They quickly forget about them and move on. That's where you want to be headed... Where you attach no meaning to the thoughts or sensations and where you do not respond to the thoughts or sensations with compulsions.

Edited June 1, 2017 by PolarBear

[Dave321]

Hi,

I get groinal responses or unwanted intrusive arousal.  I can tell you they never go away.  I have had them 10 years.  You just kind of get used to them but they are still disturbing. They used to cause me severe anxiety now its like I feel bad when they happen but I get over them usually shortly after.  But they never go away.  I get them in my sleep too or when I am half asleep.   I get them EVERY SINGLE TIME I see a topless guy with six pack.  Maybe I'm gay? IDK.

[PolarBear]

I can tell you that I had them when I had OCD. They're gone now. They do go away. Oh, things happen down there, but I pay no attention, I know they don't mean anything and they don't bother me at all... Just like the rest of the population.

[GG150]

Right am here am from 10ish last night ive just let happen, my anxiety and arousal/responses are sky high the now and hasnt lessen at all, is this all normal? Does it get better overtime?

I am ruminating the now but one step at a time, am just practising. 

Polar, how did you start tackling it? What plans did you have in place? If you would like to say let me know here or even pm, thanks! Just s rough idea where to start.

[PolarBear]

You start by starting. I've told you all the basics several times over. You are freaking out over the sensations and doing compulsions. That has to stop.

I guess you start with the cognitive side of the equation. Get it in your head that the sensations are not immoral. They're a learned response that can be unlearned. They don't mean anything and they say nothing about you as a person.

[GG150]

But like u said AM the one creating the thoughts and reactions when before you said  i wasnt and it was anxiety.so maybe i do want these feelings and thoughts? Its so stressful, i cant even sleep without a response, its so morally wrong

[PolarBear]

Sigh. Back to square one again. You have to get past this moral dilemma of yours. 

[GG150]

Moral? Am having bad thoughts when then i get aroused to, am not perfect but to me thats so wrong, so am sorry am struggling with this but this is everything am against and its questioning me as a person. I just want my life back without these thoughts and feelings which i saw above from someone else, never leaves u!

Then u confirming am creating the thoughts and feelings is questioning me if its real arousal or ocd groinal response

[PolarBear]

The sensations are no more immoral than an itch on your arm is. 

Anyone who says they never go away has not figured out what causes them and is not dealing with them properly.

You are causing them to keep coming by responding to them when they happen. 

[Zazoo]

I thought they'd never go away myself when I first started getting them a few months ago but as PB says they will if you just stop responding to them.  It takes time, it takes some practice but it also takes some self-belief.  Trust me my current horrible OCD issue was started by one and its been a struggle but it is something you can unlearn and deal with successfully.   

[GG150]

Ok i have just ignored for past two days, they are in full force the now. Also found myself accidently making myself have the responses is that normal to experience?

as i would have a thought then its just asif am waiting then my body would automatically begin to try and have one if that makes sense?

Also i would be like i watching netflix and a attractive woman would appear i would be like "oaft shes hot" then close my eyes then automatically have bad thought then a response. 

Just trying to learn the situations!

 

Edited June 9, 2017 by GG150

[PolarBear]

Leave the situations alone. There's nothing to figure out.

[Guest Nikki79]

In relation to these sensations could they also just be normal body sensations that at some point we tuned into and they aren't I'm fact sexual but just a response people get there but anxiously attached false meaning when they they first noticed?

[PolarBear]

That's exactly what they are. But it goes further than that. So much emphasis is put on the sensations that they start to become more frequent, sometimes happening with every intrusive thought. Then they happen on their own but they are perceived negatively.