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Anxious, fed up, scared


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I am really struggling tonight with my OCD i suffer from Superstitious/Magical thinking

My OCD targets mainly what/when i eat and when i am able to do things i enjoy in my case going to the gym, video games and other things

Food is my main concern regarding my OCD as it is forcing me to lose weight, i now weigh 55 kg which i know for a 31 year old man at 5ft8 is not good but i just can't fight this OCD enough right now to eat properly and the worse i get the more real this OCD and it's thoughts feel

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13 minutes ago, CHILLEDICE said:

So you weigh around 8 stone? Maybe you can have some protein shakes if your comfortable with that?

 

Yes just over 8 stone, protein shakes is what i am trying to do if i feel comfortable with it and food is a issue

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11 hours ago, CHILLEDICE said:

So you weigh around 8 stone? Maybe you can have some protein shakes if your comfortable with that?

I am not sure that's the point though, the issue is Mark's OCD controlling the intake. 

 

12 hours ago, MarkOVDVersion said:

just can't fight this OCD enough right now to eat properly and the worse i get the more real this OCD and it's thoughts feel

Sorry if you have answered this elsewhere Mark, but are you getting any therapy or support at the moment?

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22 hours ago, CHILLEDICE said:

May I ask, what's the issue with food?

Basically if i eat something my OCD is telling me not to eat something really bad will happen to me, not because of the food itself it's a superstitious thing, for some reason my OCD targets things i enjoy

11 hours ago, Ashley said:

I am not sure that's the point though, the issue is Mark's OCD controlling the intake. 

 

Sorry if you have answered this elsewhere Mark, but are you getting any therapy or support at the moment?

I am currently having CBT have been on and off for 2 or 3 years but more regular right now, sadly it's private CBT due to NHS waiting lists

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Youve been having this therapy for far too long for their not to be results. You should be way farther shead by now.

I suspect that part of the problem is that either your therapist is not encouraging you to challenge the thoughts or you are not doing it despite the proper encouragement.

You should be eating whatever you want by now, despite having those thoughts.

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1 hour ago, PolarBear said:

Youve been having this therapy for far too long for their not to be results. You should be way farther shead by now.

I suspect that part of the problem is that either your therapist is not encouraging you to challenge the thoughts or you are not doing it despite the proper encouragement.

You should be eating whatever you want by now, despite having those thoughts.

I relapsed about 6 months ago mainly due to money problems and my Dads ill health, along with the possibility my original medication didn't seem to be as effective anymore so changed around 3 weeks ago but i do admit there is a element of not having the balls to challenge my thoughts quite often especially when i relapse

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12 hours ago, Ashley said:

I am not sure that's the point though, the issue is Mark's OCD controlling the intake. 

 

Sorry if you have answered this elsewhere Mark, but are you getting any therapy or support at the moment?

Oh I'm sorry I wasn't trying to make a point of it or anything like that.

Mark my sincere apologies to you!

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My issue with food is thinking that I'm eating another conscious being (animal) because I like meat.  I experience immense guilt over it which antagonizes me greatly.  I could never be a vegetatian or vegan so it's like I'm trapped in a box with these thoughts.  

 

 

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Mikos could you eat ethically-raised meat or organic if it's available and not super-expensive? First Nations people often thank the animal, I don't know if that would be considered a compulsion in this case but if not it might help.  Or you could add a little plant protein to your diet if you can find something you like. I eat less and less meat but still eat some.

 

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