Jump to content

Alcohol - a personal perspective


Recommended Posts

I didn't want to go into details on another forum user's thread as it was that person's thread.

I remember the 2005 General Election and I took the next day off to watch the results with our lodger (not a big drinker) and we were both into politics (I'm not so much now - jaded) and we stayed up all night watching the results come in and I drank three bottles of red wine. At some point X said "bloody hell Phil, you've drunk a lot tonight". At the time to me it seemed normal.

Because I was getting ridiculous amounts of free alcohol through work I had no RESPECT for alcohol as I hadn't paid for it. Fundamentally it was a crutch. I got to a point were I could drink massively and still go to work in the morning clean-shaven, showered, ironed shirt but felt terrible for obvious reasons beyond hangovers.

I never craved alcohol but I did go to a few AA meetings after I split up with my partner which was a traumatic experience for both of us with all the emotional and financial issues. I learnt a lot from the fellowship and didn't drink for quite some time but ultimately I realised I wasn't an alcoholic as defined by AA - BUT I had to address my inappropriate use of alcohol and illicit substances.

I like a drink - watching football or doing crosswords in good company. A couple of glasses of wine with my lovely wife at home. It is very rare now to get drunk. Hopefully this coherent post emphasises that.

Best wishes, Phil.

Link to comment

Very interesting story Phil. Thanks for sharing.

I am what some would classify as an alcoholic (though I never use such labels as I consider them disempowering). I don’t drink anymore. Some days it’s a battle (especially when my mental health causes me to crave an instant escape). But I’m blessed because I achieved sobriety before alcohol killed me. Which it would’ve done had I continued to drink.

Alcohol recovery is my Everest. And if I accomplish little else in my life, I’ll always be immensely PROUD (not a filthy a word as some in addiction treatment would have you believe) that I chose the path that I did, chose to live, at a time when addiction was killing many of those around me.

Link to comment

You should be proud of your achievements OD and having known something things about your life with OCD and other issues | have always had a lot of respect for you.

I know and have known a lot of people who've stopped using specific "poisons" and don't seem very happy - you don't come across that way.

Self questions - why on earth would I take drugs that don't need to be mentioned by name? Why would I want to wake up taking Ibrufofen (sic) or Paracetamol (sic) - sorry about the spelling (!) to kick start my day and feel awful with intrusive thoughts that were 10 times worse? than the day before because I was hungover or "coming down".

Why would I gamble again after almost two years? I would have to be in a very bad place to put a bet on a horse to do with "inappropriate distraction". 

Best wishes, Phil.

 

Edited by PhilM
Link to comment

I think excessive drinking doesn't solve any problems, but it does create them. 

I enjoy a pint or a glass of wine, and am otherwise happy drinking water, squash (no added sugar)  or an occasional sugar free cola. 

 

Edited by taurean
error
Link to comment

When I was a kid I definitely think I had manifestations of OCD like smelling my hands because I felt they were "dirty".

When the "real horror" kicked in at 23 all I did was concentrate on academic achievements - my BA and MA and a sensible approach to alcohol and no drugs. I wasn't "well" but achieving things made me feel "normal".

I started working for a publishing company in 1999 and one sunny day a member of staff opened the blinds and for the first time I saw opposite a primary school. The fear was horrendous. I was actually having to work next door to a school - classic response to untreated OCD.

As time moved on I was promoted to senior reporter, feature editor and deputy editor on a magazine but there was always a private and shameful background - lots of C offered in functions in London, ridiculous amounts of alcohol and then tranquillisers.

My OCD has always waxed and waned but I know for a fact that I now choose to drink moderately, not take drugs and with the help of my GP, my wife and BRILLIANT members on this forum have addressed the Valium issue - almost.

Someone said to me the hard work starts when you are off the tranquillisers completely which I agree with but the start of the journey was hell. Here I am on 2mg a day from 40mg in April 2016. I'm not into self-approval but I know I've done well.

Thank you friends. Phil.

Link to comment

Not only have you both overcome great personal difficulties, but you share them on this forum. By doing this you help so many other people. You show people that it can be done. I recognise life still isn't always easy still but you've come very far.

choosing to live OD is definitely something to be proud of. Learning to take care of yourself and turn your life around is inspiring. 

Link to comment
1 minute ago, JennieWren said:

Not only have you both overcome great personal difficulties, but you share them on this forum. By doing this you help so many other people. You show people that it can be done. I recognise life still isn't always easy still but you've come very far.

choosing to live OD is definitely something to be proud of. Learning to take care of yourself and turn your life around is inspiring. 

Thank you Jennie. I know you have made your own decision with regards to sobriety so kudos to you. My war is never won, but I win the battle a day at a time.

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
×
×
  • Create New...