Chels Posted December 17, 2017 Share Posted December 17, 2017 I'm really struggling lately I went on holiday and had a weird sexual thought about my small little brother who I love so dearly and I tried to get it out of my head but it felt like it was actually happening and it freaked me out... then I have thoughts about my friends kids and I can't touch them without thinking iv done something wrong and also if I am around them and I touch something or rub an object in my head I'm convinced I'm doing a sexual act to them like rubbing or something and it is sick I know it is im letting them take control and I am trying hard to let them go but I am struggling and don't wanna lose it again I don't know why iv came on here I guess so I can write it down so iv got it out, confessed. Which is also wrong any help or advice would be greatly appreciated Link to comment
Tombarratt1 Posted December 17, 2017 Share Posted December 17, 2017 Hey Chels. Im sorry to hear about this. I’m in a very similar position to you. I have very stressful and horrible thoughts about sexuality and gender stuff, etc. I find it so tough and I hate it because I know who I naturally am and I just hate the thought because they’re just not true! ? but I’m here for you to talk to. I’m not totally sure what advice I could give because it might not be good advice for you, but I’d definitely say go out there and keep looking for professionals to help you, which they can do thoroughly. Because I’ve done that as much as possible but it hasn’t worked out 100% for me, however it might be different in your situation. Hopefully that helps and you can contact me whenever! ? Link to comment
PolarBear Posted December 18, 2017 Share Posted December 18, 2017 So Chels, what you have been doing is clearly not working. You're no less upset now than you were before. So what could you do differently? Link to comment
Chels Posted December 18, 2017 Author Share Posted December 18, 2017 @Tombarratt1 so sorry to hear you are struggling. It's so hard to cope day-to-day around people who don't suffer OCD and to them it's 'weird' or 'not right' that's why I come on here so that I don't feel like a total peadophile or weirdo which sometimes I do feel that way! ? When I know I'm a good person! But the worst thing is when I have had alcohol and I have little parts of the night that I can vaguely remember I make up scenarios in my head like iv hugged someone sexually or like kissed them or grinded on them when I know I wouldn't do that but I will go around and round in my head adding bits to the scenario then I end up having a dream that I did it and all of a sudden it becomes reality then I feel the need to confess to my boyfriend because WHAT if... it just drives me crazy I love him so so so much and wouldn't dream of it but because I had alcohol and have vague memories of the night I just blow everything out of proportion Link to comment
Chels Posted December 18, 2017 Author Share Posted December 18, 2017 12 hours ago, PolarBear said: So Chels, what you have been doing is clearly not working. You're no less upset now than you were before. So what could you do differently? @PolarBearwhat do you suggest? Link to comment
PolarBear Posted December 18, 2017 Share Posted December 18, 2017 Well, the first thing I suggest is look at what's been going on and figure out what compulsions you've been doing. I suspect ruminating is the big one. What about avoiding young people? Do you try to stay away from them so you don't get triggered? You need to know what compulsions you are doing so you can work on stopping them. You need to slow them down and stop them because they dont work. Rather than making things better, compulsions reinforce in your mind that there is a problem, ensuring that you get more disturbing thoughts in the future. Link to comment
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now