gingerbreadgirl Posted January 30, 2018 Share Posted January 30, 2018 1 minute ago, battlethrough said: Cant help but think You really need to stop ruminating on this, going round in circles, trying to pick it apart, looking for reassurance and trying to find an answer. You must on some level believe that this problem is driven by OCD, yes? In which case you must understand that everything you are doing right now is keeping you firmly stuck and you will never be able to climb out of this while still carrying out compulsions x Link to comment
PolarBear Posted January 30, 2018 Share Posted January 30, 2018 OCD would just pick on something else. What's done is done. There's no hoing back so don't go down the what if road. Deal with what you've got... OCD. Link to comment
battlethrough Posted January 30, 2018 Author Share Posted January 30, 2018 Thanks guys n gals I have a telephone appointment next week to hopefully get therapy moveing, every day is such a battle though Link to comment
battlethrough Posted January 30, 2018 Author Share Posted January 30, 2018 I do beleave its ocd but of course i dought that and that i went to far in my head, oh well, thanks for all your help x Link to comment
battlethrough Posted January 30, 2018 Author Share Posted January 30, 2018 Its hard to think we ruminate ourselves, its so automatic as soon as i wake up Link to comment
battlethrough Posted January 31, 2018 Author Share Posted January 31, 2018 Was having a better day, guilt slowly creeping, trying not to ruminate, get this constant image of her cousen creeping in, intrusive now but the fantasy was real, so fed up of this guilty cheating feeling Link to comment
battlethrough Posted January 31, 2018 Author Share Posted January 31, 2018 Ive always believed in honesty and openess, how come ocd works the opposite, that i shouldnt share certain things, intrusive thoughts i could but fantasies no, so there must always be a bit of deceit Link to comment
Binxy Posted January 31, 2018 Share Posted January 31, 2018 You're ruminating again my friend. Find something better to do with your time. Re-read the advice above. There is a way back Link to comment
battlethrough Posted January 31, 2018 Author Share Posted January 31, 2018 Im trying i just see it as wrong to fantasize about people who are close, cant beleave its not and didnt bother me before Link to comment
battlethrough Posted January 31, 2018 Author Share Posted January 31, 2018 I know its ruminateing but i cannot see atall how fantasizing about freinds or relatives of the women i love is ok, i know people do fantasize but surely not people ur partner would hate u for doing it Link to comment
PolarBear Posted January 31, 2018 Share Posted January 31, 2018 27 minutes ago, battlethrough said: I know its ruminateing but i cannot see atall how fantasizing about freinds or relatives of the women i love is ok, i know people do fantasize but surely not people ur partner would hate u for doing it That's your skewed look at what's going on. Your thinking is distorted. Ruminating is not the answer. Link to comment
OceanDweller Posted January 31, 2018 Share Posted January 31, 2018 I guess the obvious (but potentially antagonistic!) question is... do you imagine your partner fantasises about your friends and family? Link to comment
battlethrough Posted January 31, 2018 Author Share Posted January 31, 2018 Thats the thing, weve spoken before, shes had wild fantasies so have i but she says they were before we met, its always been a thing not to ask for most couples i suppose Thats whats so confusing,when i felt so guilty about fantasizeing about her sister she flipped but understood the guilt was ocd, this time when i said i was ill she said i better not of been fantasizing about other women, youve got me, at the time it wasnt about fantasies but of course its latched onto that, i dont know whether shes being hypocritical and just doesnt want me doing it or she really doesnt, i know women fantasize different to men, we are very visual and to the piont but women are more complex with theres, Link to comment
PolarBear Posted January 31, 2018 Share Posted January 31, 2018 (edited) You're ruminating, rationalizing, trying to figure out if you're bad or not. This will go nowhere. You won't find a satisfactory answer that will end this. Edited January 31, 2018 by PolarBear Link to comment
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