Struggling

[Skullpops]

Thought I was finally getting somewhere. Away to bang my head off the wall! 

[Headwreck]

Hope you're OK. You still are getting somewhere, there will always be bad days but you'll come out the other side.x

[Skullpops]

14 minutes ago, Headwreck said:

Hope you're OK. You still are getting somewhere, there will always be bad days but you'll come out the other side.x

Thanks mate. Truly appreciate your support. Hope you're alright x

[hedvig]

There will be highs and lows but doesn't mean you aren't moving forward. Maybe some stressors around you causing a flare up? Sending warm thoughts your way.

 

PS. My baby girl learnt yesterday to clap her hands. Remember you writing yesterday you're also staying at home with a baby so thought I could share that with you and possibly bring a smile on your face. 

[Skullpops]

Just now, hedvig said:

There will be highs and lows but doesn't mean you aren't moving forward. Maybe some stressors around you causing a flare up? Sending warm thoughts your way.

 

PS. My baby girl learnt yesterday to clap her hands. Remember you writing yesterday you're also staying at home with a baby so thought I could share that with you and possibly bring a smile on your face. 

Aw Hedvig,

Thanks ever so much! I am pretty stressed so that does make sense. 

Aw, that really did make me smile! Clever girl ❤️ How old is your little one if you don't mind me asking? 

x

[hedvig]

I'm glad!  And please know, I'm here - feel free to message me whenever!

She's going to be 8 months tomorrow. Time really flies! OCD hit me hard when she was around 5 weeks, probably hormones and all the stress but at the time I felt completely devastated. The time when you want to be happy and carefree and instead I was trapped in OCD loops. But with time (and some hard work, should probably give myself more credit for that) things have become a lot better. 

What about yours? (If you feel comfortable sharing).

 

Edited March 2, 2018 by hedvig

[Skullpops]

2 minutes ago, hedvig said:

I'm glad!  And you know, I'm here - feel free to message me whenever!

She's going to be 8 months tomorrow. Time really flies! OCD hit me hard when she was around 5 weeks, probably hormones and all the stress but at the time I felt completely devastated. The time when you want to be happy and carefree and instead I was trapped in OCD loops. But with time (and some hard work, should probably give myself more credit for that) things have become a lot better. 

What about yours? (If you feel comfortable sharing).

 

Awk bless you, thanks so much again! I'll drop you a message! 

I understand that devastation. I relapsed during pregnancy. Well done on battling it so bravely, go you! 

My little one is 13 months  

[taurean]

Sending you some positive vibes Skullpops ++++

Try and find some me-time and fill it with a pleasing activity - it will ease your stress. 

Also learn some simple relaxation techniques - such as the meditation of the breath, or the bodyscan, meditation. These will also help to ease stress and regain your equilibrium. 

When you feel better, focus on rejoining your treatment programme at the point you had reached. Really focus on that - it will help

 

[Skullpops]

5 hours ago, taurean said:

Sending you some positive vibes Skullpops ++++

Try and find some me-time and fill it with a pleasing activity - it will ease your stress. 

Also learn some simple relaxation techniques - such as the meditation of the breath, or the bodyscan, meditation. These will also help to ease stress and regain your equilibrium. 

When you feel better, focus on rejoining your treatment programme at the point you had reached. Really focus on that - it will help

 

Thanks so much! 

I find it incredibly difficult to have 'me time' as I'm a single parent and my youngest is just a baby. 

I'll certainly take your advice on board though, thanks again  

[Avo]

I feel for your situation Skullpops, its so difficult to find time for ourselves with kids. Life can feel relentless. Do you have any family or friends you could lean on to give you a bit of spare time? even for just now and then? 

[Skullpops]

2 minutes ago, Avo said:

I feel for your situation Skullpops, its so difficult to find time for ourselves with kids. Life can feel relentless. Do you have any family or friends you could lean on to give you a bit of spare time? even for just now and then? 

Thanks Avo! 

When the kids are in bed at night, I use that time to catch up with housework ect. 

Yes, I'm fortunate that I have a good family and friends around me though I hate asking them, they have their own lives too and I hate bothering them.

[Avo]

At least you have that support network there if you need it, we don't like putting on people either, we only have one child, our son who is 5 but our nearest family is about an hour away, but with only one child I believe we have it quite easy compared to more than one!. He feels hard work enough just himself! My wife's parents have taken him on occasion to give us a night off.

I would say that asking every now and then is fine. Doesn't have to be for the night, an hour during the day now and then may be beneficial, sometimes just stopping is great. Even just for a few mins. Kettle on, feet up. 

[Skullpops]

Thanks Avo, I appreciate the support and advice.  

[Dragonfly]

Thinking of you Skullpops and here if you need a chat! 

I used to feel bad asking for help to look after the kids sometimes, and wouldn’t ask, but no one really minds, and an hour or so just to have a peaceful cuppa or pop to the shops on your own is sometimes just what we need! 

Hope today goes better and sending lots of positive thoughts! Xx

[Skullpops]

1 minute ago, Dragonfly said:

Thinking of you Skullpops and here if you need a chat! 

I used to feel bad asking for help to look after the kids sometimes, and wouldn’t ask, but no one really minds, and an hour or so just to have a peaceful cuppa or pop to the shops on your own is sometimes just what we need! 

Hope today goes better and sending lots of positive thoughts! Xx

Ah Dragonfly, 

Thanks ever so much. The anxiety is kicking my bum big time today! 

How are you? xx

[Emsie]

Hi SP, 

Keep going, keep busy, try your very best not to engage in any thoughts. I often feel physically anxious for no apparent reason. If a trigger and hence thought comes along it makes me far more vulnerable to latch on to it. I find the anxiety takes a while to go as our bodies are so used to feeling this way and it's like we are on red alert. If you have any thoughts today, you could just say something like 'I'm not dealing with that right now' and keep going. Or you could say 'whatever'. Just keep going and focus on your gorgeous children. I'm not in CBT right now so that's what I try to do, you of course will have your own ways of not engaging. Just wanted to say what helps me right now, whilst I wait to learn about the cognitive side of things. Sending you big hugs. Xxx

Edited March 3, 2018 by Emsie

[Skullpops]

21 minutes ago, Emsie said:

Hi SP, 

Keep going, keep busy, try your very best not to engage in any thoughts. I often feel physically anxious for no apparent reason. If a trigger and hence thought comes along it makes me far more vulnerable to latch on to it. I find the anxiety takes a while to go as our bodies are so used to feeling this way and it's like we are on red alert. If you have any thoughts today, you could just say something like 'I'm not dealing with that right now' and keep going. Or you could say 'whatever'. Just keep going and focus on your gorgeous children. I'm not in CBT right now so that's what I try to do, you of course will have your own ways of not engaging. Just wanted to say what helps me right now, whilst I wait to learn about the cognitive side of things. Sending you big hugs. Xxx

Hi Emsie! 

Thanks so much for your advice and support! 

Yup! Physical anxiety is really bad today...nausea, shaking ect! 

I try so hard to ignore the thoughts, or say I'm not dealing with them right now, but my head screams at me that I absolutely must figure them out. 

Bless you for helping me Emsie, big hugs sent your way xxx

[Emsie]

36 minutes ago, Skullpops said:

Hi Emsie! 

Thanks so much for your advice and support! 

Yup! Physical anxiety is really bad today...nausea, shaking ect! 

I try so hard to ignore the thoughts, or say I'm not dealing with them right now, but my head screams at me that I absolutely must figure them out. 

Bless you for helping me Emsie, big hugs sent your way xxx

You're so welcome SP. I'm sorry you're struggling with the anxiety. It will pass, although I know that's so easy for me to say. Keep going with not engaging with the thoughts. I know exactly what you mean by your head screaming at you that you have to figure them out. But, we don't have to. We have to leave them alone and remember OCD lies all the time and we have distortions of thinking. Keep repeating that you're not dealing with it right now. Get so engaged in something positive. Don't do what I do sometimes and do nothing as that's the worst thing for a ruminating mind.

Thank you for my hugs. More sent your way too. Xxx

[Skullpops]

4 minutes ago, Emsie said:

You're so welcome SP. I'm sorry you're struggling with the anxiety. It will pass, although I know that's so easy for me to say. Keep going with not engaging with the thoughts. I know exactly what you mean by your head screaming at you that you have to figure them out. But, we don't have to. We have to leave them alone and remember OCD lies all the time and we have distortions of thinking. Keep repeating that you're not dealing with it right now. Get so engaged in something positive. Don't do what I do sometimes and do nothing as that's the worst thing for a ruminating mind.

Thank you for my hugs. More sent your way too. Xxx

Are we the same person?! I am sooo guilty of sitting doing nothing, which is a great opportunity to ruminate! 

I have an overwhelming and urgent need to be able to go back into the past and 'check' stuff. Obviously I can't do this, hence my distress. I fully understand this is sooo typical of OCD but y'know how it is! 

Hugs! 

Xxx

[hedvig]

Me three! ??

Hope you are kind to yourself today, Skullpops. xx

[Skullpops]

Just now, hedvig said:

Me three! ??

Hope you are kind to yourself today, Skullpops. xx

Ach bless you Hedvig! 

Meant to be going out today but I don't much feel up to it and my eldest doesn't want to go anyway, looks like a day in! 

Likewise, so easy to tell each other to be kind to ourselves yet can't say it to ourselves! Xxx

[taurean]

I am running our - new - home at the moment as my wife is recovering from illness. 

I turned the household chores into fun by really getting into how beautiful the property is emerging as we tune our belongings to it. 

And I play my favourite radio stations while I work. 

Just by doing that, the work becomes fun and enjoyable and,yes, relaxing and beneficial. 

[Skullpops]

1 minute ago, taurean said:

I am running our - new - home at the moment as my wife is recovering from illness. 

I turned the household chores into fun by really getting into how beautiful the property is emerging as we tune our belongings to it. 

And I play my favourite radio stations while I work. 

Just by doing that, the work becomes fun and enjoyable and,yes, relaxing and beneficial. 

What a great idea! 

Sorry to hear that your wife is unwell though, hope she recovers really soon! 

[taurean]

6 minutes ago, Skullpops said:

What a great idea! 

Sorry to hear that your wife is unwell though, hope she recovers really soon! 

She was fine on the journey here then the stress got to her, bringing on cystitis and feeling perpetually cold coupled with chronic constipation. 

The doctors have been great and somehow, I managed to get her to the blood clinic at the hospital to take a test. 

The result shows she has an underactive thyroid and she has started treatment and is beginning to feel better. 

This has taken a month but I put my faith in the medics, once I was able to get her to them to register and be examined. 

So I have been concerned, but not worried - and kept myself busy, and distracted. 

As a result I have generally been doing ok and ploughing a necessary, if lonely, furrow. And the members here, and our families, have been supportive. 

[Skullpops]

1 minute ago, taurean said:

She was fine on the journey here then the stress got to her, bringing on cystitis and feeling perpetually cold coupled with chronic constipation. 

The doctors have been great and somehow, I managed to get her to the blood clinic at the hospital to take a test. 

The result shows she has an underactive thyroid and she has started treatment and is beginning to feel better. 

This has taken a month but I put my faith in the medics, once I was able to get her to them to register and be examined. 

So I have been concerned, but not worried - and kept myself busy, and distracted. 

As a result I have generally been doing ok and ploughing a necessary, if lonely, furrow. And the members here, and our families, have been supportive. 

Ach bless her. Send her my best wishes. 

All things considered, sounds like you are doing just fine, well done! 

Hope your wife is feeling 100% soon, I'm sure with a loving husband and a lovely new home to make your own she will be feeling good in no time