Is this another 'angle' which ocd is working from?

[Guest Saz]

One of my main worries about my ocd false memory is that I'm worrying that its not a false memory but potentially something real. This fills me with utter dread and sheer panic. I cant seem to break this way of thinking. (Although admittedly been feeling slightly better in recent days).

When I first used to post I feel like people were more confident that it was ocd at play that had caused my false memory and would advise me a such. Now I feel like people tell me that I'll 'never know' etc etc. Is this because I've posted a lot and people are trying to be cruel to be kind or are people genuinely doubting me? (Don't mean any of this in a nasty way, its just got me thinking).x

[Ascend]

So you think everyone else' worries are potentially not real? Come on now Sarah...

People are saying that you'll never know because you have to accept uncertainty.

[Guest Stormwave]

My psychologist once said about false memories, you know deep down which is real, based on your character and things, so go with that one.

[Guest Saz]

Thank you both just struggling but trying so hard to get better.

Ascend sorry I'm not sure what you mean about me thinking other people's worries are not real. Of course they seem real to them. x

[Guest legend]

not a false memory , its a unwanted irrational thought.

[Guest Saz]

I know legend, I always know you will pull me up on that x

[Guest legend]

and what does that unwanted irrational thought do to you ?

[Guest Saz]

Cripple and disgust me, make me cry and blimmin frustrate me! x

[Guest legend]

and what does one do to try and rid onself of the feelings and the thoughts

[Guest Saz]

Try to work it out in my head, neutralise the thought and basically have a constant battle going on in my head x

[Guest legend]

Ok so do you work at not doing the compulsions ?

[Guest Saz]

I try but obviously I'm not doing very well x

[Guest legend]

I try but obviously I'm not doing very well x

not easy x horrid illness , but keep perservering x

[PolarBear]

One of my main worries about my ocd false memory is that I'm worrying that its not a false memory but potentially something real. This fills me with utter dread and sheer panic. I cant seem to break this way of thinking. (Although admittedly been feeling slightly better in recent days).

When I first used to post I feel like people were more confident that it was ocd at play that had caused my false memory and would advise me a such. Now I feel like people tell me that I'll 'never know' etc etc. Is this because I've posted a lot and people are trying to be cruel to be kind or are people genuinely doubting me? (Don't mean any of this in a nasty way, its just got me thinking).x

I thought I was quite consistent in telling you that you won't know. You were always of the mind that getting better meant you would finally be able to be certain, once and for all. That's not the way it works.

Overcoming OCD involves accepting doubt and moving past it. You've spent far too much time and energy trying to figure out that night. It hasn't worked. No amount of future time and energy will bring you closer to a definitive answer. So let it go.

Stop the compulsions. Slowly you will begin to not care do much about finding the answer. Thats the road to recovery.

[Guest Saz]

You have polar

Im kind of going back to a lot earlier.

I know what I have to do x

[Guest Saz]

Not wanting to start a new thread.

Why is it so hard to keep hold of the small moments of clarity? If they are the truth then why can't I just see it? x

[PolarBear]

Stop searching for the truth and it won't bother you as much.

[Guest Saz]

I'm not saying that as such im wondering why the moments when you kind of see it for what it is never last x

[gingerbreadgirl]

so frustrating isn't it just part of the condition unfortunately x

[Guest Gloria123]

Just wanted to say that I´m ill at home today and just laid on my couch and started to ruminate about day x and what really happened and - oh wonder - I just can say that I don´t remember clearly. Because of my rumination my fear and bad consience is worse....I hope that I can distract myself again so it reduces a little again...

[Guest Saz]

Thanks gbg x

Hope you feel better soon Gloria x

[Guest Saz]

I hate this!

When I'm feeling much better it drags me back down wih all the what if and why questions!

I am trying so hard to ignore it all but for example today it's screaming at me ' you were anxious for a reason and that reason is because of xyz' it makes me feel incredibly sick. I'm just going round in circles here when im trying so hard. It's probably because it's not ocd false memory.

Sorry for rant guys, im fed up with it x

[Guest beecham]

It's really hard I know how you feel. Especially when you've been feeling better. Try not to let yourself be dragged down by the same questions though - it sometimes helps me when im going down a familiar route to step back and think 'ive been here before, and i havent found an answer, and ive felt better in the end' and then try and focus on something else.

xxx

[Ascend]

It keeps coming back stronger because you give it the reaction it wants.

Everytime you get an anxiety spike you ruminate, searching for certainty and end up straight back at square one. You need to stop the compulsions as has been said many times now.

[Guest Saz]

I know I'm rubbish x