i just cant cope

[GG150]

Hi had a wet dream last night which resulted me to masterbate as i done it wrong. Now just before the climax i have a thought of a loved one or pocd and its killing me. I feel guity and ashamed and all sweaty and feel very sick. I just dont feel i have the strength anymore and doubt i want to even be here. Please anyone that can guide me or has this please reply and talk to me. I feel so alone aswell snd isolated. What can i do to stop the thoughts being there so i can do it properly and never do it again. Feel like this will last days to correct it which it always does. Please someone talk and guide me

[DownTheRabbitHole]

You can't stop a thought from popping up in your head, you can change the way you react to thoughts. Ive had awful thoughts pop up into my head whilst being intimate with my boyfriend but I try to just brush them off. Thoughts mean nothing, it's just OCD.

[Guest Tayo37]

I also suffer terribly with intrusive thoughts please any advice would be so helpful right now

[DownTheRabbitHole]

You just have to try and let the thoughts come and go without interacting with them, it's very hard to do I know.

[Guest Tayo37]

It is hard some days are better than others I hope with support on here I won't feel so alone with this I am quite a happy person until I have these thoughts they make me feel sad

[GG150]

Do you have the same problem as me tayo? And yeh its easy said than done. But its morally wrong and i know if its anything else i should ignore but cmon how can you ignore my problem? I just cant deal with the guilt and sickness thats comes with this ritual i have to do this properly before i go back to my cbt work. Am scared.

[Guest Tayo37]

I have harm ocd about hurting people I love which breaks my heart also I hate mess and need things just so these thoughts are awful I am on medication I have all kinds of thoughts that upset me and scare me I hope I can overcome this some day I hope you are ok gg150 always here to support you

[GG150]

Thank you and best wishes to you to tayo..just cant deal with this ritual..just so helpless and soul destroying..would do anything to stop the thoughts..can you possibly live through them especially during masterbation which i had to fix because of a unwanted wet dream because i gave up on masterbation because of this.. if i can get through this sexual ocd thoughts about incest and pocd i know i can get pass it...just the thoughts are so strong..just want to fix this then back to my normal cbt work

[Guest Tayo37]

It's so tough but try to separate the thoughts from you as a person I find it hard to but wen you can do it it does work think of it as a beast of ocd and not actually part of you it's horrible I know but they r only thoughts and you are a good person that's why these thoughts upset you try and remember that as it's the truth

[GG150]

But how can you accept that you have climaxed to a image of a loved one? Its like you stop yeh but youl always remember the last time you masterbated and it was to that..you know.. then the guilt and the sickness comes in which is unbearable i feel like sucide at times because of it. Its like everything is fine right upto the most important part and thats the climax and the thoughts just appear and are very strong. Just hope i can fix it soon as ot took me nearly 3 days the last time

[PolarBear]

I'm not sure I understand what ritual you are talking about. Could you enlighten me?