Urge to ruminate without intrusion?

[Guest stuckinmyhead]

Does anyone else get this? I'm working hard as I can to stop my conpulsions which are mainly rumination. But I find sometimes there's high anxiety and I get the urge to check my memory even when I haven't had the intrusive thought first.

[PolarBear]

Intrusive thoughts can be fleeting. You may not really notice them. The point is you want to do compulsions and you know you need to stop them.

[Guest stuckinmyhead]

I'm just at my whits end polar. I've managed to not ruminate at all today concerning two false memories- I say that with doubt because they feel real but I've had false memories before. Then one intrusion got me ONE! And it was the worst and most life like image/feeling/doubt that I did do this sick terrible thing in the past. How can that be the strongest doubt I've had in the 3 yrs I've had this obsession when I've managed a whole day without doing it. I feel destroyed.

[PolarBear]

One day of not ruminating isn't going to change anything. You have to keep going. Getting to a better place is a marathon, not a sprint.

Continue on. Ignore as best you can the intrusive thoughts. Don't engage with them through compulsions. Refocus your mind onto something else. Take a 'so what' attitude about the whole thing.

[Guest stuckinmyhead]

How can I take that approach when this false memory is so horrific and the feeling that its happened

[PolarBear]

What's so different about this intrusive thought over any other? They're all bad in their own way. They're always bad. We don't get OCD about white, fluffy bunnies. We get intrusive thoughts that really bother us.

I can tell you that if you go down the ruminating trail you're not going to do yourself any favors. You'll get stuck again and you'll be thinking and thinking about this thought and no good will come of it.

Based on past experience, treat it as OCD. And that means watching out for compulsions and nipping them in the bud.