help please doctors appointment!

[boogiewoogie12]

Hi, sorry not really ocd I don't think.

For last months ive been having really bad moods. I can be out with mates really happy messing about and come home and something tiny can make my mood go really low and I feel **** and angry and hate life and me.

Depression is normally when one is depressed all day everyday right? Or bipolar up one day, down another?

What is wrong with me? I go up and down in same day.

I partly think I feel **** cause I don't want to do career I chose from fear ?

Help please got docs tomoz but scared what they'll say xxx

[talknerdytome]

Hi Boogiewoogie12,

Depression is not necessarily all the time, it can be up and down in a day. Bipolar is usually a period of being high for weeks or months and then a period of being low for weeks or months. What was the career you wanted to do? Just remember the doctor is there to help you, that's all.

[boogiewoogie12]

Oh right thanks for clearing that. Teaching I love it but scared as worked in a school with awful staff. Xx

[talknerdytome]

Perhaps you could try volunteering at other schools and see if they are all the same? I'm sure you would be pleasantly surprised.

[boogiewoogie12]

I feel like people around me just don't understand and I don't wanna stress that cause I feel ill make them feel bad and they'll be stressed and ill or worse. I dunno whether to just say I have ocd and not that I feel depressed and see if that helps xxx

[boogiewoogie12]

Yeh I could do I no its stupid I should just go do it cause it was one placexx

[talknerdytome]

What makes you think you have OCD?

[boogiewoogie12]

I have ocd ive had it for ten years ish. I have instrusivs thoughts that my family will die, get cancer if I do certain stuff or don't which makes me dk stupid rituals like praying loads over n over, sorting towels, counting when drinking until it feels right, never letting bubbles on soap as I fear that means cancer. Rewashung stuff all time. Washing my hands all time. I have ocd of contamination but also instrusivs thoughts around death and being my fault xxx

[boogiewoogie12]

I go through periods of panicing over something stupid too lol I'm not going into detail cause its too much but I've posted everything on here ha. My ocd worsened about 2 years ago xx

[boogiewoogie12]

I dunno what to do I might cancel appointment. I don't want to be diagnosed with depression something else what might be worse! Xxx

[boogiewoogie12]

Can u get better without outside help? I'm too scared to get help.

[PolarBear]

Can u get better without outside help? I'm too scared to get help.

Then you may stay stuck right where you are for a very long time.

[boogiewoogie12]

Tbh though my ocd isn't that bad atm I do rituals but not like I used to, I haven't spiked for a few month, its just feeling low and angry at little things.xx

[legalseagull]

Yes some people can get better without outside help. It's hard work though. Why not take all the help you can get? If you're depressed - you're depressed. It doesn't matter if a doctor says it or not, you'll still have it. Best to face up to it and accept help.