Withdrawntech Posted September 21, 2014 Share Posted September 21, 2014 I know I am a nice guy, I am the one who wil walk to the shop at anytime rain or snow to buy a 'terrys chocolate orange' just because a girl was nice enough to take my number when I offerred it, and maybe she will call, or maybe she threw it away when I wasnt looking, It doesnt matter, and I will take any amount of 'scrutiny' I will ask a woman if I can buy her coffee and when I am rejected will maintain composure and say 'never mind' and not bother, and I am 32 and single I have no children and I do want them, I could tell you about how I approach a woman and come on obvious but not overbearing, and am told 'I am sorry but I am seeing someone at the minute' which at the minute always sounds 'Dubious', But thats all my perspective, and all past and no one can help with that, But what I am struggling with is when I am out I talk to any women I find attractive and ask them out, it seems compulsive, I mean its all women I find attractive now, and there are many of them, and it is tiring, and I worry I am getting a reputation which would be unfair, because they all say 'no', so I am single and I have done nothing wrong by asking, and Incase anyone was wondering I have only ever slept with one woman in my life, so I am not as someone suggested a 'manwhore' any help, good god I didnt want to write this post, but I need help Thanks Dean Link to comment
Guest imalright Posted September 21, 2014 Share Posted September 21, 2014 Not sure if that's an OCD behaviour as I'm not too experienced in it - others on the forum may be able to assist with that :-) I'll tell you one thing though...from a girl's point of view....or maybe from my point of view...a more discreet 'hit' works better. Actually - don't let me generalise all women there....just....if I see a guy all over every woman trying it on and then it's my turn - I'd always make an excuse not to entertain them...x But! This may well be a behaviour that you find difficult to control...it's certainly possible it could be a compulsion. I guess I'm trying to explain the reaction that you may be getting from the ladies as a result of your OCD/non-OCD behaviours :-)xx Link to comment
Withdrawntech Posted September 21, 2014 Author Share Posted September 21, 2014 It's definatly ocd worries about people thinking I am 'jumping from girl to girl' cause I dont do that really, I chat and only if I get good conversation and 'chemistry' out of it do I suggest they take my number, then I wait, for a week see them in same instance, and ask if they thought about it then if 'chemistry' is gone, or they say 'no' I move on so I am talking about 4 different girls over a month, they OCD bit is the waiting I'm sure you sympathise with 'waiting' thats when it gets me, thank you for your time. Link to comment
legalseagull Posted September 21, 2014 Share Posted September 21, 2014 You've said, twice, about women taking your number. Do you ever get theirs? Personally I'd never phone a man up for a date - only because I wouldn't have the confidence. I'd be thinking, if you've given me your number you must've already given it to loads of other, more attractive women. Can friends help you out? Fix you up with any of their single friends? Or join things - clubs, groups, activities, courses - and get to know women as friends and see where that takes you? Or internet dating sites? Link to comment
Withdrawntech Posted September 21, 2014 Author Share Posted September 21, 2014 Never thought of it that way, I always want to give the woman all the say, I guess I thought that was showing respect, when I ask it is because I want their time, and as I said Its strictly a one person courtship, I couldnt cope thinking more than one woman may phone and want my time. But I see your point, I may ask for the next ones phone number. thankyou you guys havent said I am better on my own, so thanks for that. Link to comment
legalseagull Posted September 21, 2014 Share Posted September 21, 2014 Showing respect to women and not coming on too strong are both good things. However, I would be flattered if a man took my number and then kept his promise to call me. I'm all in favour of the woman doing the asking, it's just that I'm not confident enough. You can definitely find someone. For some people it comes easy, for others it's more difficult. Link to comment
Guest lizinlondon Posted September 22, 2014 Share Posted September 22, 2014 Try internet dating or joining some social groups. A good place.to meet new people is www.meetup.com Good luck, just keep going, there is someone for everyone! Link to comment
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