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I commented earlyer about im deal with things ok

Of course red flag for ocd to throw something at me

Sorry if this makes you feel sick towards me.

in my very bad days i worked at a hostel,i sufferd badly mentaly but had to clean dorms,i didnt have a rubbish bag and the was a pair of orange kids pants,i picked them up like rubbish,i think i put them in my pocket then thought,why did you do that,also when cleaning rooms i would freak out if i saw underwear but would look again to check.

I told my partner about this ten years ago,she didnt think anything of it,but surely only a sicko would put them in there pocket,hows that checking or ocd,its just weird

IM a good provider,father and have high morals but when strange stuff like this from my very distant past pops up it makes me dought the goodness of myself

SO sorry if this causes offence

Understood if you feel u cant support on this

I was looking at a orange plant yesterday thinking how beautiful it was,now orange is triggering me back to this

Sorry again

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First you have to stop the self deprecating talk. "Sorry if this makes you feel sick towards me." "Sorry if this causes offence." "Understood if you feel you can't support on this."

Stop! This kind of talk isn't going to help you. It just reinforces your belief that there is something wrong with you.

Second, by now you should be able to recognize OCD at play. You've been through this enough times you should have a clue what's going on. It doesn't matter what happened 10 years ago. The problem is that it suddenly got dredged up again, OCD latched onto it and now you're fixated on this thing. It's the exact same pattern you go through every single time.

You know the way forward. Resist and stop your compulsions. Check your ruminating. Leave the thoughts alone and get on with your day.

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Guest nervous

Hi Battle, most of our thoughts good or bad show up out of the blue but I am sure you don't obsess about the good ones. PB is right you have to stop the depreciating talk you are doing your best to convince us that you are a bad person and I believe it is a compulsion of yours kinda like confessing something. If you need to talk about resisting compulsions that's great but be careful because often talking about it becomes the compulsion

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