Hi, new member :) *intrusive thoughts sufferer*

[nicolallnn]

Hi guys, I've just joined the forum after being diagnosed only today with OCD.

I have suffered with intrusive thoughts and had a fear that I may be a paedophile since just before Christmas. I know it's not been long, but it's been very distressing. I also started to think about hurting cats, including my own, really becoming afraid of myself. I am on an antidepressant, which has helped ALOT, but I have my good and bad days of course. I have experienced anxiety & depression for over 3 years also, after I was indecently assaulted when I was 15.

It would be fantastic to talk to others who have similar experiences with this condition.

Nicola xo

[dksea]

Welcome to the forum Nicola! I think you will definitely find people who can relate to the types of thoughts you struggle with (including myself for some of them!). Congrats on getting your diagnosis (though obviously it would be better if you didn't have OCD of course) , that should help open doors for you in terms of treatment. OCD can definitely be scary but it's something you definitely can manage and take back control of your life! Feel free to check out the main OCD-UK site and jump on to the main forums too!

[Guest Ally]

Hi Nicola

It's good that you have had a diagnosis, and the anti-depressants are helping.

Knowledge is power in the battle with ocd,so now you know what you're dealing with ! That'sa crucially important start.

It's good too that you are being open about your symptoms. it's the best way to get help and support.

Violent thoughts are so distressing.

I was plauged with them in the past, but happily I handle that aspect of my ocd better now.

The ocd too, often changes it's "tactics" , chamellion style !

I once took in two stray cats, one after the other. One was in a bad way and my heart bled for him. He was so lovely !

However intrusive bad thoughts had a big hold on me at that time and cruel thoughts towards the cats began to force their way into my mind.

I was so frightened of them that I gave both cats to a cat charity to "protect" them !

However what I did was not the best way to have dealt with the problem.

I was doing something which you may or may not have heard of which is called "avoidance" in ocd speak.

Rather than confronting my fear of harming the cats I did the what seemed logical to get me relief - I got them out of my life !

Actually people with ocd are usually the least likely to do the bad things that they fear doing. It's because the thoughts are so repugnant to us that they cause us so much anxiety ! So we're not very likely to carry them out.

You have the chance now Nicola, to learn ways of greatly reducing the power that your intrusive violent and sexual thoughts have over you. I didn't have that help at that time in my life unfortunately.

Incidentally, as I am writing this message, I am being repeatedly interrrupted by my new cat, another stray I've taken in, as she steps on the keyboard, and I stop to give her a cuddle. She's a great wee companion.

At the time that I gave my two cats away, I couldn't have envisaged taking in another

If a cruel thought towards her enters my mind, and they still do, I just let it pass, I dont engage it or argue with it, but show my true contempt by letting it pass through and float off into oblivion !

That's a far better way to deal with these horrible thoughts and I still get to spoil my little moggey who I adore !

So you see we can overcome these thing without going to extreme measures.

I wish you sucess in this journey.

Cheers

Ally

[nicolallnn]

Thank you for sharing your experience Ally. It's very reassuring to know that people go through similar struggles. When I started getting intrusive thoughts I felt very alone. You are right in how the diagnoses will help, my GP didn't hesitate in sending me to a consultant, so now I can move forward. Sorry to hear about your cats also, I couldn't imagine giving my cat away, she means so much to me and is so in tune... she's like a little supporter for me. It's great you've overcome that however and now have a new cat!

Thank you for your support & encouragement Best wishes.

Nicola xo

[Guest Ally]

Hi again Nicola

You are very welcome.

I'm sure you'll learn how to deal with this and get on with your life too.

Ally