inneedofhelp

Anybody ever thought they were actually going mad? I'm struggling very badly at the moment, Start CBT a week Monday. Have Fluoxetine - but scared to take them and actually just went out before and felt like screaming out loud, like I have a demon inside me.

Well I went to the doctors and poured my heart out. Doctor was really sympathetic. Has put me back on meds and is getting me immediate therapy..........no wait. At the same time she also said that a lot of symptoms I've had have warranted further investigation and doesn't feel that I have been unreasonable seeking reassurance? She would also like me to see a consultant regarding another possible issue that could be cancer related. She isn't that concerned but says that she feels it is the right thing to do. So here's to another few weeks of worry.

Drives you crazy mate. Not nice at times byt meds do take the edge off it when they kick in.

I've made another appt for the doctors.............................but this time to go back on meds. He'll probably be quite relieved when I explain it's to take the edge off the compulsions. Also I need to go on CBT. Depending on the waiting list I might take this up in work as they also have it available as they are a very large company.

I'm struggling. I genuinely feel like If I don't I'll die.

That might not be a bad idea. It's no life anyway as it is.

I'm in a really bad way. Tears are rolling down my cheek. I ended up giving in. Went to docs. Told all okay. Then as you know reassurance doesn't last long. I then paid to ask another doctor to check another mole online. You guessed it all fine. Then tonight I was scratching my back and picked a spot. Convinced this too is cancer. I can't go on. Feel ill with worry and exhausted that I've spent my day off doing nothing but worry.

I worry about getting ill. This has been HIV, HepC, Cancer, Asbestosis etc so I've aways kept away from anything that may give me a risk. It just seems to be getting worse. I've had 3 blood tests in the last 3 months. Now I'm worrying about a mole even though 3 doctors (reassurance) have said it's fine. A fortnight ago I had a scan on something else. Really struggling. Wife is going nuts as I'm looking for another opinion on the mole.

I live with my wonderful wife of 30 years but she's had enough of my OCD and to be honest I don't blame her. Really struggling at the moment. Fear of radiation, Asbestos, Hiv, Health Anxiety etc Not sure If I can cope any more. Saturday went near some smashed glass near an antique shop. I was convinced it was an old vase which used to have a bit of uranium added to make the colour green. Tonight went to chippy and was standing next to a logistics driver - the company delivers everything from retail to petrol. I've now convinced myself he was on way back from a nuclear site and brushed past me. I'm really wondering if its worth going on. It kind of goes away for a bit then comes back and bites.

My experience with this drug was awful in the first month. Night sweats were awful. I even started to think I was seriously ill.

Thanks

I know. I know. I'll try. Just feel so stressed out.

I must look like a bloody idiot. I just can't help it. Been out tonight and all I can think is these ;twigs' I walk by. Keep checking my foot to see if I have any needlestick injuries.

This Hiv lark again. Keep thinking I've stepped on a syringe. Taking me ages just to walk a-b. My foot even throbs at times sending messages to my head, Cracking up.

I've had OCD for 30 years or so and have been self employed and employed during this period. About 7 years ago I had a breakdown after I thought I'd caught HIV by coming into contact with a person who came from an area in Africa high with hiv. I didn't have sex with him, kiss him, have drugs with him. I merely sat by him and touched his pen. Ridiculous I know but itr shows the extreme OCD can go to. I had nightmares, couldn't move out of bed for a week and was housebound for months, In the end I resigned from my job as I couldn't go back. Last year I had another opportunity to go and get a good job with a large blue chip company and things are going well. However on my health declaration I said I had no illnesses and yet I have this illness. I'm scared that one day I will react to a situation in work and it will send me off ill. A lad in work has recently been dismissed for being off with stress as he wasn;t covered under the disability act as it was less than 9 months since he decalred his condition. Am I covered?