I Made It To The End Of The "Working" Road

[taurean]

If anyone had asked me , when I turned 50, if I would be able to carry on working until this time, I would have thought they were joking.

And yet I had to do that, it was the only realistic way for me to support my wife (profoundly deaf and easily stressed) pay off our mortgage and put sufficient funds into pensions to meet basic needs later in life.

My wife couldn't work (she hasn't done for around 24 years) and I had problems with my feet (collapsed arches) and severe problems with OCD - for which it was obvious I had to get treatment.

I was luckier than many on here - I had medical insurance through the firm that would pay for a certain amount of CBT, and sort out my feet..

But the first OCD therapist - whilst he taught me a lot about CBT - was convinced that flooding my mind with my OCD fears would resolve my problems - but as these were triggered by violence, I could not go down such a route and totally disagreed (as did my subsequent psychiatrist and therapist).

So I changed to them, and began to make progress, although I didn't understand why I got such intensely repetitive thoughts, and why an episode would go on so long - and I don't think they knew either - that knowledge would come from reading the book "Brainlock".

Thanks to my therapist, an enlightened boss, a sympathetic Employer and ultimately The Equality Act, I both began to handle the OCD tolerably, and my workload was adjusted to help me to cope.

14 years on and I have now retired, that mortgage was paid off, and I am looking forward to not having to travel and walk so much - which was dragging me down, although the walking was great for fitness.

So maybe this story can inspire others - I used self-help as well as my personal therapy, and I am convinced that a determined person can do very well just with the right self-help. By using Cognitive Behavioural Therapy coupled with it's Exposure and Response Prevention methodology, we can make a difference to our OCD and carry on in employment - I am proof of it.

My working journey started with a trip to the youth employment officer, who told me to go into insurance, and was then kicked off by Dad using nepotism to get me my first job - but I had to move from The Midlands To London - hated it at first, and found that the streets of London are certainly NOT paved with gold.

My working life ended today in Chelmsford, with some emotional goodbyes from people I have really bonded with - even though only working with them for 4 months. Our absolutely wonderful female managing director gave me a hug, as did quite a few others, there were long faces and handshakes.

But I then walked out the door without looking back - I wanted it to end on a high.

So with this in mind, I got out of the train at Stratford and had lunch in the - massive - Westfield shopping mall - (jayjay you would LOVE it) in the John Lewis store. They have a marvellous viewing platform there of the Queen Elizabeth Olympic Park, so after lunch I took a stroll into the park

As someone who lives and breathes the Olympics, it seemed a fitting way to end my last day as a working man.

Edited July 31, 2014 by taurean

[Guest OCD-in-ireland]

Congratulations taurean,

You are an inspiration, especially for a young student facing into the pressures of career choice.

Thank you for all your wise words across the forum and I wish you all the happiness in your retirement.

[NicoletteCB]

Wow that's amazing! Very inspirational! It's good to have ex-sufferers such as yourself on this forum because it helps people who are currently suffering like me have some hope that we can make it through this evil disorder.

I always worry about OCD's impact on my education and future career opportunities but now I'm working to beat this disorder and I read Brain Lock yesterday for the first time, very helpful book.

Wishing you a very peaceful retirement

[Guest AJ45]

Wishing you a great retirement - doing all that you wish. AJ

[taurean]

I'd like to share with you the abiding images from after my first lunch as a "free" man in the Westfields shopping mall (the viewing platform at the viewing gallery in John Lewis, Westfields shopping mall), and my walk into Queen Elizabeth Olympic park, the legacy park out of London 2012.

You can expand the images by clicking on them, and that will show my narrative per picture too.

You can see more pictures from my gallery by clicking on my picture to access my profile, then click on Taurean's gallery.

Edited August 1, 2014 by taurean

[Guest jayjay89]

Congrats roy, I'm sure you will be a successful retiree

[Guest Sisyphus]

Congratulations on your retirement Roy. I know you'll make it a good one.

Wow Stratford's really changed since I last saw it in 2001!

[taurean]

It's a City in its own right now.

The shop's are fab - ul ous, there is loads of new housing, the station now supplies overground underground and docklands light railway services, plus a short walk away is Stratford International station with high speed links to Kent and the channel tunnel , I think.

There are some building works to the left (just off image I think) of the foreground on the image towards the stadium from the John Lewis viewing platform which are part of what was described as the "international quarter" which will be for 25,000 people.

Yes, the Olympics have totally regenerated the area . Hooray!

Edited August 1, 2014 by taurean

[Guest Sisyphus]

It's a City in its own right now.

The shop's are fab - ul ous, there is loads of new housing, the station now supplies overground underground and docklands light railway services, plus a short walk away is Stratford International station with high speed links to Kent and the channel tunnel , I think.

There are some building works to the left (just off image I think) of the foreground on the image towards the stadium from the John Lewis viewing platform which are part of what was described as the "international quarter" which will be for 25,000 people.

Yes, the Olympics have totally regenerated the area . Hooray!

Yeah I must admit it does look pretty impressive compared to back then. I remember getting stranded in Stratford one Sunday night cos I missed the last train home. It was pretty bleak back then, so nice to see how it's turned around.

[Guest OCDAY]

That's inspiring. Your first sentence describes where I am at now............................

Due to return to work on Monday after a lengthy absence and am dreading it(had CBT, ERP and now off meds, read brainlock).

If you don't mind me asking how did your employer support you???

[taurean]

Hi OCDAY

They asked me to see their occupational health doctor, and upon receiving his report, accepted that my OCD was sufficiently challenging that, in accordance with the Equality Act 2010, reasonable adjustments were needed to my working life.

They reduced my workload and allowed me time off needed for ongoing therapy if and when required.

.

Edited August 2, 2014 by taurean

[Guest OCDAY]

Thats my problem........mine haven't and they seem to be making it more difficult.

Been refered to Ocupational Health 3 times. Nobody seem's to comit to what "reasonable" adjustments are under the DDA. I am deemed fit for work I just need a little support.

You are very lucky they accepted and supported.

Enjoy your retirement and be proud of what you have achieved.

[Guest OCDAY]

That's exactly what my 3 Occ Health reports said.

They have reduced my workload slightly. I will see what happens Monday.

[Guest Sisyphus]

That's exactly what my 3 Occ Health reports said.

They have reduced my workload slightly. I will see what happens Monday.

How long's it been OCDAY? I dread this scenario myself. I am worried about what to say about the time off on a CV, how to justify it in a job interview. I guess I'll just have to try the honest approach as I don't really do lying. But then I dread being politely declined by everyone.

Well for what it's worth, whenever I've been in a scenario where someone else is returning to work after anything like this, it strikes me that people can't do enough to try and make sure everything's OK. So hopefully it'll all pan out better than you're anticipating.

You've done really well to get it together and get back out there man. A big well done to you. Be proud of yourself.

[Guest Noo]

Massive congratulations on your retirement Taurean! Xx

[Guest OCDAY]

Hi Sisyphus

Over the last 18 months I have had various periods off due to relapses.

Just been off again for a couple of months (due to hospitalization), which led to a benzo addiction.

Got to try and focus on the positives...................I have come so far in 18 months as we know it's a long process.

[Guest Sisyphus]

Hi Sisyphus

Over the last 18 months I have had various periods off due to relapses.

Just been off again for a couple of months (due to hospitalization), which led to a benzo addiction.

Got to try and focus on the positives...................I have come so far in 18 months as we know it's a long process.

Yeah it's a long process - like erosion.

Indeed, positive thinking is our friend in all this.

Good luck man.

[Guest jayjay89]

I blatantly lied about the 6 month gap on my cv - honesty is usually the best poiicy, but I couldn't take another rejection or anymore time unemployed. Also I knew it was easier to get a job when I had one already, so I got myself a poo job and then started applying for jobs I wanted. I wish I lived in a place where I could have been honest about it, but mental illness is still not ok here, so it wasn't really a choice.

Good luck ocday how's the benzos going? You were doing really well last update!

[Guest Sisyphus]

I blatantly lied about the 6 month gap on my cv - honesty is usually the best poiicy, but I couldn't take another rejection or anymore time unemployed. Also I knew it was easier to get a job when I had one already, so I got myself a poo job and then started applying for jobs I wanted. I wish I lived in a place where I could have been honest about it, but mental illness is still not ok here, so it wasn't really a choice.

That's interesting. I fear that's probably the case here too, despite all the lip service to the contrary. Maybe I'll just pick a place and turn up there one day and start demanding a desk and computer and see what happens.

[Guest OCDAY]

Hi JayJay,

Thanks for asking. It's getting easier without the benzo's, think I may be through the worst - touch wood.

Will be 3 weeks on Monday without taking Diazepam!!!!! :original:

[taurean]

Well perhaps there is another route; doing some temping.

Gets you back working, and you are actually in a job when applying for something else.

I kinda expected to have to end up doing that, but I was useful to the company because of my expertise and knowledge, so my job kept going, although I had to switch domain from London to Chelmsford.

[Guest OCDAY]

Thanks Taureen. I am extremly useful to the company due to the same as you knowledge and expertise, in a field that is hard to learn.

That statement alone is very helpfull as I had'nt thought of it like that, maybe it is OCD telling me my employer doesn't want me. I will see how things go Monday.

[evolve]

Inspiring story taurean and sounds like you'll enjoy your new found retirement

Thanks for sharing!

Chris