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Guest Hope22

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Hi there, I have been suffering with OCD for 16 years now and haven't yet managed to gain any control over it. I have fears of HIV and have had numerous unnecessary tests over the years. I recently had a night out with friends and because my memory of the evening is a little hazy, I have convinced myself that I've had sex with someone and contracted HIV. I have no memory of such an incident occurring and it would be quite out of character for me but my mind is telling me I should get tested otherwise I could be responsible for passing it on to someone. Am I letting my OCD win if I get tested? Any help would be much appreciated as I feel like I'm losing my mind. x

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Thank you for your reply. You're right. I will resist! Have you overcome your OCD? I am trying but it's tiring at times especially when I have bad bouts like this.

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Guest Whizz4848

Hi Hope, good haring from you sorry you are having such a tough time at the moment. CBT is usefull, I am also doing a Mindfulness course which looks really good I am practising every day as have been signed off work due to Anxiety and a recent diagnosis of CFS. The book Mindfulness by Mark Williams is a great place to start off with this and has a free cd of meditations and is generally thought of as one of the good self help books. I really struggle with my thoughts and cant seem to just accept that they are not real and hold no value or strength.

Polar Bear I was interested in your response to Hope that you are 80% recovered can I please ask what has been the most helpful stuff in your recovery? Thanks

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Thanks for your replies. I'm on the waiting list for CBT and I'm seeing a psychiatrist on Monday as things got really bad earlier this week and my GP referred me to the mental health crisis team. I think this might be the worst I've ever felt. I have tried mindfulness in the past but when I'm this bad, my coping strategies go out the window. I am still considering getting tested though I know it's the wrong thing to do. I am a bit of a mess and can't see this getting better :-(

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