I'm suffering :(

[Chipre]

I am in great distress right now and really need help. Ok, at school some annoying kid was throwing a paper airplane and it fell on the ground. Then he picked it up, threw it at me(I was sitting with my bookbag) and it landed between my back and bag. The anxiety was terrible.... I have extremely severe dirt ocd and it's only getting worse, meds are not working. When I got home, the anxiety calmed down a bit, and I was so sleepy so I went to bed for a nap. My back was dirty because of the paper airplane, and now my bed is dirty with no way to clean it :eek: Now even though the anxiety had calmed down when I first got home, now it's very strong again and very distressing. What should I do? Will the anxiety eventually go away no matter how strong it is? It's so strong. I can't be at peace knowing that my be is dirty. I feel as if now this anxiety will stay forever unless I clean my bed.... is this true? Or will my anxiety eventually go away without me having to clean my bed? What should I do? Wait for the anxiety to go away? Someone please tell me as soon as possible, please.

[Chipre]

Please help.

[PolarBear]

What has happened is you have inadvertently been exposed to that which you fear. Normally exposures are done within controlled settings but this happened and now you have to deal with it.

Wanting to wash your bedding is a compulsion. You think you need to do so in order to feel at ease but all it does is reinforce in your mind that there was something wrong in the first place. You have to realize that no one else (other than someone with your OCD theme) would even think about dirt on a paper airplane, let alone want to clean their bedding over it.

Try the best you can not to perform compulsions -- in your case, washing your bedding. See if your anxiety level goes down on its own. Usually anxiety will dissipate by itself and that's what I hope will happen for you.

[Guest TheBiggerPicture]

It's extremely difficult living with OCD but like PolarBear said try not to wash the bedding.. If you do it will all be ok and you will finally feel great again.

Until the next time and believe me it wont be long before something else happens.

But if you do choose to fight it you will be one step closer to beating it, even if it's a really small step.

Though to me I'd say that would be a pretty big step!

Good Luck!

[Chipre]

I really appreciate the replies.... thanks. Sadly I had to clean up the bedding because the anxiety just wouldn't go away. I tried resisting, but it wouldn't leave me alone. Even though something bad happens every day, I just hope something as severe as this(or worse) never happens again. It truly is a struggle.

[PolarBear]

That's okay, Chipre. You dealt with it and now it's done. Take a deep breath and try to relax.

Going forward, are you seeing a therapist about your OCD?

[Guest TheBiggerPicture]

Been there done that, the relief is quite something isnt it! God I wish we didnt have to go through this!

[Chipre]

That's okay, Chipre. You dealt with it and now it's done. Take a deep breath and try to relax.

Going forward, are you seeing a therapist about your OCD?

I was seeing a CBT therapist, but I wasn't improving because my condition was so severe, so I got referred to another psychiatrist for meds to help lower the symptons so the CBT can be easier. Unfortunately, the meds are still not working, even after trying several meds already.