Help for Mental Rituals

[Sodovka]

Hi everyone,

Despite a lot of knowledge of and experience with my OCD, I'm struggling pretty hard these days. Does anyone have tips or advice for someone who has fears of harming others but no outward compulsions? I can't always figure out what my mental rituals are so how can I stop engaging in them?

[PolarBear]

You first need to identify them. I guess you have to be a bit like a detective, on the hunt for compulsions. So you have obsessions about harming others. What do you do immediately after you get such thoughts? Do you try to negate the thoughts in your head? Do you ruminate over the thoughts, going over them again and again, trying to figure out what they mean (likely)? There's quite a few different types of mental compulsions. The trick is to ferret them out and start working on stopping them.

[Sodovka]

Thanks, PolarBear. I know enough to not try to negate the thoughts or reassure myself about them. But I do think I'm ruminating and engaging with the thoughts quite a bit. My process has been, lately: 1) Accept that my worst fear could come true. Sometimes I imagine myself engaging in the dreaded act. 2) Redirect, and try to get back to whatever I was doing.

The problem is when I get bombarded by the obsessions, I just kind of panic. This is where I think I'm falling into mental compulsions, but I'm going to have to try to figure out what exactly they are. I'm just having a hard time teasing apart the obsessions from the compulsions. They both feel just like bad thoughts/feelings.

[PolarBear]

Obsessions are usually fleeting. It's a quick thought that lasts only a few seconds; sometimes not even that long. It's all the dreck that happens after that's the compulsion. If you find yourself thinking and thinking and thinking, it's a sure bet you're doing compulsions.

Don't let being bombarded catch you off guard. You have to expect those times to happen. They've happened many times before and they'll happen again. They shouldn't be surprising you. Just think, they're just thoughts. That's all they are. They aren't you. They say nothing about who you truly are.

[Sodovka]

You are a huge help, PolarBear! Feeling more in command of my reactions today. I really appreciate how you pointed out the "thinking and thinking and thinking," which is of course what I do when I get scared by an obsession. I'll try to keep that behavior in check.