ERP is hard

[NicoletteCB]

I just wanted to update that I am exposing myself to triggering pictures and not doing compulsions (analyzing/labeling my feelings) and I am getting very spiked and anxious but am carrying on. I am wondering though I hope I am not doing the ERP wrong, any guidelines for doing it? I am also not labeling intrusive thoughts since this can be reassurance.

[PolarBear]

Actually it sounds like you're doing okay. We expect that you will get a spike of anxiety, followed by an urge to perform one of those nasty compulsions. Not doing so doesn't feel very good but after a while of doing exposures you learn that your anxiety does go down on its own. Make sure you give yourself enough time in between exposures. You don't want to repeat them too fast. Give yourself time to let your anxiety go down and for you to reach a calm state for a while before trying another one.

Keep going!

[NicoletteCB]

Thanks Polar Bear! Yes I'm taking breaks but also doing ERP with the messages my girlfriend sends me so reading them and accepting whatever I feel, even if the anxiety and feelings make me uncomfortable. Also been told to agree with sexually intrusive thoughts such as " You like male genitalia" and countering with, " Yeah sure I do" so it's quite unsettling but I hope to get progress from this all eventually.

[NicoletteCB]

I am curious, how do I spike myself more? My brain has gotten used to disregarding the feeling and thoughts I dislike but I need to take it up a notch! Should I look at triggers and tell myself I feel nothing and never will? I tried today but the reaction was a little too relaxed from me.

[PolarBear]

Isn`t that a wonderful position to be in. Things aren`t bothering you as much. I`d just keep working on what you`ve been working on. Something else may come to you to try out.

[Symps07]

Keep going Nicolettecb, sounds like you're doing well :original:

[NicoletteCB]

Yeah when I talk to my girlfriend the thoughts pop up like " WRONG FEELING YOU DONT LOVE HER" and it's harder to let em go cause we're facetiming and stuff so I figure I should accept them and how i feel when we talk but thanks guys

[taurean]

I think you do the ERP on that ?

[Guest nervous]

It sounds like your doing pretty good, as always we struggle until we figure it out but without the struggle we would never get to that. The general rules for ERP are simple and apply to just about everybody, when it comes to the tiny details of ERP that's a little bit harder to explain and seems to vary more between people. When I had my ERP with a therapist he was insistent on trying to get my anxiety level higher, I didn't understand why at the time but now I can see he was afraid that I was doing some self reassurance so that I wouldn't feel the fear as much which would reduce the effectiveness of the ERP. I couldn't tell you what is right or wrong but keep working on it and you will get there.

[NicoletteCB]

I read a straight erotica as a erp spike and i'm super spiked rn and afraid that I'm turned on from what I read or want/like it ugh oh no dont know what to do

[NicoletteCB]

False alarm, I conquered the anxiety!! Hooray!!

[Symps07]

Excellent! :original:

Use it as proof that you can overcome this!