Going out and not drinking

[Mrs brown]

I really struggle with this. I don't drink alcohol at all and haven't for five years, tried it in my teens but stopped for a few diff reasons. I don't like the feeling of not being in control and it makes my anxiety worse, I also get trouble with my stomach when I'm anxious eg going out places etcand alcohol on top of this makes me feel very sick. I also have a massive fear of vomitting. So when I get invited out I just take my car. I get really anxious in social situations anyway but I really worry what people will think of me for not drinking like will think I'm weird etc. I'm supposed to be going out tonight but feel like not going for fear of what people will think. I'll be nervous anyway because social situations make me nervous but when I'm out and dressed up etc I usually have a pretty good time without alcohol I just worry that it's not normal to go out to bars etc without drinking? Can anyone help or have any experience of this?

[PolarBear]

I don't drink. It's a personal choice and I have no problem drinking coffee while the people around me drink alcohol. I have no problem with it and it's not my problem if other people have a problem with it. Chin up and don't let the worry get you down.

[Mrs brown]

Thanks polar bear I just sometimes feel that I shouldn't go to bars etc because I'm not drinking but that's where my friends go and it's better than being stuck in the house even tho the thought of actually getting out makes me really anxious

[PolarBear]

I understand that. I think it's important to face your fears and go ahead and go out. You don't have to feel bad about not drinking. You can even get a pop in a tall glass and it will look like everyone else's drink. Do what it takes and do try to have fun.

[Mrs brown]

Thankyou for your advice! I'll try my best

[Guest joe_123]

You shouldn't worry about not drinking - There does tend to be a lot of pressure when you are younger though.

I can totally understand what you are saying with the anxiety and not being in control. I don't like drinking but I remember 3/4 years ago I got pressured into drinking at a work birthday party - I had about 4 pints and then about 4 shots. When going home on the train I felt really ill and was worried I might not make it home. There were really dodgy people on the carriage and I could barely walk, I was worried I might pass out or get mugged or something.

I haven't drunk since I don't think I will again. I tend to find people are ok with me not drinking these days, although that may be because most people my age are starting families and not everyone can go out binge drinking.

[Guest OCD-SoundGuy]

Don't worry about it, there will always be some individuals who will apply pressure to you to drink and comply with the 'social norm' however be strong and don't bend to the peer pressure.

Personally i've never drunk a drop of alcohol in my life and never intend to, with my social anxiety and ocd just the thought of being anything but in absolute control of a given situation makes my anxiety spike, along with being on medication which can change how people handle alcohol. With me being in my second year of university i'm sure you can imagine how foreign it can be to some people not to be regularly binge drinking however i've never had any issues attending events where everyone but myself is drinking, and even now only a very small group of my close friends know the reasons behind my decisions.

M

[Mrs brown]

Thankyou all for your advice/experiences. It's so hard because you feel like by not drinking you won't 'fit in' because our culture everyone seems to want to go out and get drunk! I went out sober and actually had a good time. Started to feel a bit panicky when the place filled up so left not long after this but prior to this I had fun. Ocd sound guy I'm at uni too so I totally get how you must feel but I'm the same as you if I was to have alcohol I feel it would make my anxiety much worse. I hate the thought of not being in control. I'm starting to feel a lot more comfortable too being around everyone drunk when I'm sober mh close friends know my reasons too and are pretty good about it. Thanks again everyone

[Guest ADD]

At least you save a lot of money cause alcohol drinks at places are crazy expensive. And they're not healthy or good for your appearance.

Though if you think you have OCD fears about drinking or getting buzzed, then you should probably try to face that. In situations going out when I was a teenager it helped reduce my social anxiety. It wasn't until I was a full adult that I started to feel scared of being under the influence of anything and not feeling in total control. It is a fear that is better to face, that you could still be ok to not have to feel in 100% control or be a control freak. Not as a lifestyle or anything, though occasionally it is ok to let go and relax some about your control and an occasional drink or buzz is not going to hurt you!

Edited March 7, 2015 by ADD