Bad Dream!!

[findingithard]

I'm having a really bad week!! Really bad!!
So I had a dream early hours this morning, it was horrific, sick and disgusting and I woke up with the worst anxiety ever.

The dream was horrible, a little boy had been raped in the dream and his bum was covered in poo and ugh I can't even type this it's making me ill, his bumhole was stretched and omg this is so horrible. I don't even know why I dreamt this it's killing me and I'm panicking so badly

I changed my daughter just before and she had a poop that looked like that little boys and ugh I guess it's triggered me really badly, so bad. I was wiping her and it felt like I was doing what happened to that little boy like I enjoyed it, I then noticed she was still dirty but it felt like I wanted to wipe for a bad reason but I didn't wipe, she was going in the bath anyway so thought she can get cleaned that way ugh

Sorry for how horrific this post is but it freaked me right out

[findingithard]

Someone?? Anyone??

[Guest Otloz]

I mean this with all the sincerest empathy and care, but I laughed a little at your post. Then again I have a very morbid sense of humour. Dreams can be, and very often are disturbing, especially if you're taking anti-depressants or other psychiatric drugs.

Ask yourself
What is the sensible thing to do now?

What is the calm way to respond?

Edited May 22, 2015 by Otloz

[Symps07]

You had a bad dream, that's all. Don't dwell on it.

:original:

[findingithard]

I know it was just a dream but it's what happened with my daughter that's freaking me out more ugh. I feel like I've done something extremely bad. Even though the first wipe was just to clean the poo away but it felt like I wanted to wipe her again for a bad reason, related to the dream I had. It's like I was thinking 'oh I can wipe her again as she has poo still there' but in a horrible sexual way I guess?? I didn't wipe her because I realised what I thought and said I can't and put the in the bath so it would be cleaned that way

I hate myself and my life.

[Caramoole]

I hate myself and my life.

Then you have to change it.

Like I've just said in another thread.....You can't ever improve the situation by carrying out compulsions. You have to use every fibre of your being to try and change the way you respond.

[findingithard]

Why was the thread name changed? I thought I had to put trigger if I thought it would trigger someone.

Edited May 22, 2015 by findingithard

[Caramoole]

Because we don't allow Trigger Warnings. Anything can be a potential trigger to another person

[PolarBear]

You're still freaking out every time a new obsession comes up. You're not looking at this new one in light of all the other ones you've had. You're not looking at it as just another obsession, just another intrusive thought.

[findingithard]

Oh right, I didn't know. Sorry.

I know, I'm sorry, Polar.

[Guest HeadAboveWater]

Girl, I have been having the weirdest dreams since being on Venlafaxine. Not so much like the one you had but just very movie-like and real feeling. Sometimes I wake up and have a weird lasting feeling from the ''realness'' feelings of the dream. I was just complaining to my husband about how I hate how vivid my dreams have become. I am sorry you had such a disturbing dream but it is true that medications make our dreams seem even more intense. Plus, your dream is revolved around your OCD fear which causes more anxiety. Try not to dwell on it. I am suffering really bad this week with my POCD, as well.... All the best to you, finding.