The "Simple" Series ! - A Simple Way To Give Yourself A Purpose And Find Beneficial Distractions

[taurean]

When I was working I had a role which allowed me to express myself and feel good - it amplified my best attributes, so boosting self-worth.

Now, those of us in work often may feel that the job is beneath them, doesn't use their best skills, help them to develop and enjoy their work. But by reframing things, plus making suggestions to the management, it's possible to shift the emphasis and move things forward and find more enjoyment in our work.

We can accept where we are, or we can look to make simple adjustments that can shift that bias into the beneficial - then, if we warrant it, and our ideas are good, the management will take note.

When I retired there became a void and I shifted from having a great purpose to feeling I had no great purpose at all - and this left me prey to OCD.

My wife - understanding this - and i have put together a set of new roles for me which redress this balance,and with which I am very happy.For a bit of fun - more humour in our lives is always good - we have called this :

"10 roles or less"

In deference to the heartwarming film titled "10 items or less".

My new roles are:

Chief procurement officer -aka buying in the groceries!

Sous-chef - I am taking on more of the cooking, and learning how to cook more adventurous things.

Kitchen manager and recycler - basically cleaning and washing up, and doing the recycling. I do this during the week, she at week-ends.

Gardener - for the more heavy duty work - my wife does the planting and watering.

Research officer & route planner- I can use tools like the internet to plan journeys, seek workmen, areas we might like to move to etc.

Secretary - my wife is not computer literate so i am helping her with her (very time-consuming and lots of travelling) work as her mum's power of attorney.Also the family e-mails and texts flow to her through me.

Cat locator and manager - a fun role re the neighbours' cats who visit the garden.

Negotiator with third parties on behalf of us - skills I learned at work.

Cleaner - I have taken over designated parts of the household cleaning.

Project manager - it's my job to supervise home improvements

We are both really pleased with these roles, and I have plenty to do around the home and garden now. And keeping busy beneficially improves a sense of purpose and self-worth, and helps restrict OCD's disruptive influence.

:original:

Edited July 28, 2015 by taurean

[Markie1974]

Good job !

[sim123]

Great idea

[Guest Heryn!]

Cat locator and manager - a fun role re the neighbours' cats who visit the garden.

Do you use a cat-nav?

[taurean]

Do you use a cat-nav?

Hey I like that one! I must tell that one to Mrs Roy :haha: :clap: Maybe she'll buy me one!

[Dave]

Another good post, Taurean! You are full of good ideas, and boost morale on here, too. Perhaps you can be this forum's official Morale Development Officer!

I definitely find that when I'm mentally occupied my symptoms wane.

[taurean]

Another good post, Taurean! You are full of good ideas, and boost morale on here, too. Perhaps you can be this forum's official Morale Development Officer!

I definitely find that when I'm mentally occupied my symptoms wane.

i like that - really pleasing comment thanks Davey. I'll have to consider adding that to the list of roles

[Gemma7]

Do you use a cat-nav?

:lol:

[taurean]

My wife loved this :haha:

She witnessed the two black and white spotted cats in the back garden today.

She considers Moses, the larger one, a more vulgar thug, and Spotty the charming sweet innocent, pressured by the more dominant Moses.

She devised lines of demarkation - Spotty to have the left-hand side plus the coal-shed roof - Moses the right hand side and the potting shed and garage roof.

But cats don't like being set rules,and "infringements" do occur :original:

Edited July 28, 2015 by taurean

[Guest Heryn!]

Today I have had the role of Milkwoman (not involving a real cow... it wouidn't fit in my house); Artist (crafting) and Executive Sofa Tester. Joking aside - I have made no real progress today. Maybe tomorrow.

But cats don't like being set rules,and "infringements" do occur :original:

They like their 'purr-sonal' space, those meowsers.

[taurean]

You have another new role though. Comedienne! ! Maybe we could call your style "kitten humour" :clapping:

And you are good at it too, fur goodness sake !!! The members are just lapping it up.

Makes me want to paws for thought, and claw back what I just said.

And, I suppose, thereby will hang a tail.

:original:

[Guest lauren415]

The problem with this (for me) is that I have no motivation anymore. No motivation to work (although I do because I don't have a choice), exercise or start a new hobby. I've lost interest in life because of my OCD. And yes I am on an antidepressant...waiting for it to kick in...(been on it 4 weeks now).

[taurean]

You are not alone Lauren.

I have found the meds may really help - may act as the crutch we need to help us engage with therapy, find a sense of humour, use relevant CBT tools that we learn about.

When that all comes together we may start to pull back the hold OCD has over us so that we begin to regain the upper hand. At that point, you will likely fell able to engage with the idea behind this thread.

The forum is here to hold our hands and help us along the path.

:group: :original:

[Markie1974]

The problem with this (for me) is that I have no motivation anymore. No motivation to work (although I do because I don't have a choice), exercise or start a new hobby. I've lost interest in life because of my OCD. And yes I am on an antidepressant...waiting for it to kick in...(been on it 4 weeks now).

Lauren , imo the most important thing other than CBT is exercise. I know it's hard but you HAVE to motivate yourself. It helps to tremendously reduce the frequency of my intrusive thoughts.

[taurean]

Good point here re the exercise

I have up on the wall what is called by my wife "the power of six".

Ii is 6 guidelines to use when we are really struggling, and my wife helped me devise them. I fact, they are so good I think I will rsise a separate topic about them to seek to help lift others.

The idea is that - however low we may feel - if we simply focus on these it will aid us towards refocusing and regrouping.

Here we go:

1. Make sure you eat properly. Add in fruit and vegetables.Add a multivitamin and mineral pill to restore deficiences and give a boost.

2. Try and get some daylight - lack of daylight lowers our mood - our body and mind need it.E.g. Many people show symptoms of depression (seasonal affective disorder) in winter when they don't get enough daylight - I am one of them!

3. Take some exercise (if medically safe to do so).

4. Strip away stressors and engage a simple basic life.

5. Take regular rest and sleep; sleep may come easier just by knowing you are taking action using this "power of six".

6. Ignore - without engaging with - intrusions which are OCD - or you suspect are OCD. Otherwise, take each negative thought and reframe it.How can you reappraise/reframe it so that you can look at it in a more positive light?

Using this technique, we can gradually "burn" a new positive pathway onto our brain and the old negative one will fall out of use.

Edited July 29, 2015 by taurean

[Guest lauren415]

I know exercise helps...I used to exercise 4 days a week and I was at my happiest at that time. That was when I was on Prozac (which I am back on now) and it was fully in my system. But for some reason I am thinking it's not gonna work this time. I know that's just my OCD telling me that. But I've never had my current "theme" before so I don't know how to handle it.

[taurean]

It is quite common for the OCD theme to shift.

But it is also well worth bearing in mind the analogy we like to use on our forum. We think of the core way that OCD operates as the "meat" in a cookery dish, and then the themes as "different flavours of gravy (a british sauce) that get poured on top".

It tends to really help to understand how the "meat" - the basic OCD - will normally operate. I have personally met a number of sufferers of various types of "gravy", and many more have corresponded here. Say people come on asking for a specific book on checking OCD - but it isn't needed - the checking "flavour" is just a different manifestation of the OCD "meat" taking a fear, threat or possible threat, and grossly exaggerating it - as it also does for contamination and harm.

So how are you in understanding the core way OCD works? You can search for previous topics on this by using the search field top right.

Hope things improve for you and that the drug helps. As you obviously know it takes time to build up in the system. But it will hopefully at least work from the point of view of helping you engage with the therapy and feel better generally - which is what Citalopram is doing for me (I can't tolerate prozac in my system). This is what your compatriot Jeffrey Schwartz called providing "waterwings" to help us float while we engage with the therapy, in his wonderful book "Brainlock" about OCD.