Worried I got a Woman Pregnant

[Winchester]

Hello. I met a woman online who I hooked up with very shortly thereafter. I was not attracted to her ( I was actually unattracted to her), but just went with it since we planned it before we met face to face. This was a couple weeks ago. Now I keep thinking that what if I got her pregnant. When we met it was her last day here, and she was going back to Canada. Now I keep thinking what if because of me there will be this fatherless child living in Canada. Also, I went back to school recently, and having a child would create huge difficulties for me to say the least. The thing is that I wore protection, but I did not pull out. After I finished, I kept having intercourse for a few minutes longer to not be impolite since it happened quick. Sorry for all these details here, but this is part of what I keep thinking about. I feel that because I stayed inside after loosing my erection, the condom, which would've gotten loose, might have leaked.

Other than a few brief texts which I sent her to be polite, we haven't communicated since that day. I want to ask her if she's had her period lately, and tell her honestly what my concern is.

Is this a good idea? Thanks.

[Symps07]

Hi Winchester,

I went through a similier situation a few years back in which I had (unprotected) sex with a work collegue & then worried I may have gotten her pregnant. She took a morning after pill an hour or so later, but I was still creased up with anxiety about it for the next few weeks.

I did everything from reading through the morning after pills instruction guide multiple times to asking her to take mulitple pregnancy tests, & while they may have helped to alliviate the anxiety for a few minutes or so, the fear always came back & as bad if not worse.

At the end of the day, the fear of having a child is the obsession & all the checking, looking for reassurrance, etc... are just compulsions that are feeding this fear.

At the end of the day, she may be pregnant, but when you get the panic/fear, you need to collect you thoughts for a moment & ask youself how likely is it that she is? Is it really that plausible? or is your OCD making mountains out of mole hills? It was with me, unfortunetly, it was before I had been diagnosed with OCD, so I didn't know anything about it, so I fell into the trap of performing the compulsions everytime & it made me feel rubbish all the time.

I suggest not worrying about it, let the thoughts come but don't ruminate on them or perform any compulsions.

Regards

Symps

[Winchester]

Thank you very much Symps. Actually, to be honest, prior to reading your message I already reached out to her to let her know my concern. It turns out she is taking injections which stop her from having a period, so she can't get pregant, even through unprotected sex, unless she stops the injections. Little surprise that immediately after that I switched my focus to the possible of having caught an STD.

I'm starting to feel better now, though.

Best.

[Symps07]

Glad to hear :original: