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Body Dysmorphic Disorder sufferer


Guest eviejay

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Guest eviejay

Hello everyone,

I have been diagnosed with having BDD now for two weeks, after this being a problem for years and years. Although I am happy that someone could tell me a name for what I am suffering - somehow it has not managed to "Cure" anything. I thought that if I was just given a name and for not me to think I was just being "Vain" would help me. The problem is still there, it is emotionally draining, and although I do wish to get over my problems, it is easier said than done. I am doing what the doctors orders were, going to groups, counselling. But somehow none of it is working so far. I guess I got to give it a chance.

I am 23 year old woman. My problem started at 17, when going from being a healthy 17 year old (Size 18) I was diagnosed with IBS and was put on laxatives by my doctor. The weight, of course started to drop off me. People started to comment on how "good" I was looking. I started to think, and obsess then about my weight and how changing myself would be a good idea for me, to make me feel good about myself. Only nothing is ever, and I mean ever good enough. I obsess about tummy and face/lips and cheeks. I am now a size 8/10 and am not happy within myself. I keep chasing for something, but what is that something im looking for? I have even lost sight of what I want. I can not be in a room with mirrors half the time in fear of looking at "that" spot that may not look how it did 10 mins ago.

First, it was dying hair, then getting loads of tattoo's to "Cover" my body and hiding from the world. Then it was picking at my hairs that I thought made me look "in perfect" .....

It got to a point where I started to buy sedatives off back streets to be so "out of it" and "calm" that I didnt care what I looked like, this only lead to an addiction to pain killers and sedatives that ruined my life. I am now in recovery from these, but in the cold light of day, this illness is taking over my life. It do have a hold over me, and right now I do not know how to help my mind. The mind is a strong power tool. I would like it if someone who has gone through this, or is going through this, any advice on how they managed deal with this illness. Any help right now would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks,

Stephanie

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Hi eviejay,

I don't have BDD just OCD so I'm afraid I can't I can't offer you any advice on that subject, but I would like to take this oppurtunity to welcome you to the forum :welcome:

I'm glad to see you have found this forum, I'm sure it'll be of use to you :original:

Unfortunetly, finding out that your disorder has a name doesn't instantly make it go away, but it does let you know it is an identifiable illness, that you are not alone & that there is a way to overcome it.

Understanding a disorder is often a huge part in finding whats the core of an issue & therefore how best to combat it. Unfortunetly, it also does tend to take time, (you'll hear a lot on the forum about little victories) & no shortage of effort on your part to make sure you stick to the therapy you've decided on with your therapist.

But I think you've made a great start by getting diagnosed & trying things that have been advised to you, it's always better to be positive & take the fight to the issues rather than wait for it to come to you!

I hope you feel free to participate in any of the conversations you feel you can offer advice on as well as those you feel may benefit you :original:

All the best,

Symps

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