Boyfriend with OCD - Long Term Sufferer, where do I come in?

[Guest checon24]

Hi, I have been with my Boyfriend for 4 months however we have been friends for almost 2 years. In the entire time I have known him, he has suffered with OCD. Whilst he would confide in me as a friend, it is becoming more difficult for me to deal with and see him go through now that we are in a closer, more intimate relationship. There is no doubt in my mind that I want to help him and be there for him but I just don't know how I can. He has suffered with it for a long time and has tried several different things to try and overcome it but it all just seems to be temporary fixes and he feels strongly about trying to deal with it himself. Recently he asked me to wash my hands and that felt like a step too far but I still just went along with it and did it because I didn't want to make him feel worse. How can I be there for him and support him without making anything worse? Thank you.

[Caramoole]

The first thing to stop before you get drawn in is complying with his demands, like washing your hands or going along with his demands to control his circumstances or feelings of discomfort.

Explain that you understand his distress and will do all you can to support him but not in a way that will ensure his OCD stays strong. He won't be happy with this and will possibly get angry.....but getting involved in a sufferers compulsions is never helpful.

Invest in the book "Break Free from OCD" (for him and you) . Take a look at our main web site www.ocduk.org , get him to come to the forum and encourage him to see his GP and ask for a referral for CBT

[Guest checon24]

Thank you. This is really helpful, I will definitely look into that book. I think I will talk to him more about seeking professional help as he really isn't for the idea even though I think it is for the best. Again, thank you for replying.