Can anyone help with my question please? x

[Guest Saz]

Hi everyone, hope your all well.

I've been thinking (dangerous I know) but...and I'm sorry if this sounds confusing...but when googling my symptoms the other year, or rather my specific worry, I came accross ocd and intrusive thoughts and this website. My worry is this-is that not just exactly the same as someone googling, for example, headache symptoms and coming to the conclusion they have a brain tumour when they haven't. So I have come to the conclusion that I have ocd....when I dont? I hope people understand what I mean. X

[gingerbreadgirl]

Maybe you have come to that conclusion wrongly. Maybe I have too. There is no certainty that you have OCD at all - although do you not think there is a strong possibility based on the fact that numerous people here think you have, many of whom have a lot of knowledge and experience?

You will never get the certainty you crave. With that in mind,you have two options:

1. Carry on with what you're doing for the rest of your life.

2. Take steps to treat it as OCD, stop carrying out compulsions, commit to ERP and CBT, sit with anxiety and doubt - and see what happens. If it doesn't work out, you can always go back to step 1.

The choice is yours.

[Guest Tricia]

I also understand. I even told a friend that I doubted I had OCD. She burst out laughing. So even when you've had it for decades you can doubt yourself. The French didn't label it the doubting disease without good reason.

[Caramoole]

You will never get the certainty you crave. With that in mind,you have two options:

1. Carry on with what you're doing for the rest of your life.

2. Take steps to treat it as OCD, stop carrying out compulsions, commit to ERP and CBT, sit with anxiety and doubt - and see what happens. If it doesn't work out, you can always go back to step 1.

I don't really think that reply can be improved on

[Guest Nikki79]

I don't really think that reply can be improved on

Saz you can do this. If you can I can mate. Be strong xx

[seb79]

Doubt = Ocd

[Guest Saz]

I just can't seem to make sense of it at all. I mean it just doesn't seem right or moral to continue when this is potentially not ocd x

[PolarBear]

What gingerbreadgirl said.

[Guest Nikki79]

Maybe you have come to that conclusion wrongly. Maybe I have too. There is no certainty that you have OCD at all - although do you not think there is a strong possibility based on the fact that numerous people here think you have, many of whom have a lot of knowledge and experience?

You will never get the certainty you crave. With that in mind,you have two options:

1. Carry on with what you're doing for the rest of your life.

2. Take steps to treat it as OCD, stop carrying out compulsions, commit to ERP and CBT, sit with anxiety and doubt - and see what happens. If it doesn't work out, you can always go back to step 1.

The choice is yours.

I think thats a brilliant post that is so relevant.x

[Guest Saz]

But surely we should know if we have ocd. It's bad enough to have to deal with these awful thoughts/false memory without doubting if we even have ocd aswell. x

[Caramoole]

But surely we should know if we have ocd

Take a look around this board Saz....and just look how many people, regardless of what they're told are still all saying "How can this be OCD?"

[PolarBear]

But surely we should know if we have ocd. It's bad enough to have to deal with these awful thoughts/false memory without doubting if we even have ocd aswell. x

I spent 10 years trying to figure out if I had OCD or not and doubting the entire way. Only when I simply accepted that it was OCD did I start to get better.

Edited January 23, 2015 by PolarBear

[Guest Saz]

I don't know how your meant to do this when it's beyond distressing and you have a beautiful family and little children, it's not right x

[gingerbreadgirl]

What is wrong is devoting all this time to a problem when the solution is right in front of you.

[Guest Saz]

I'm trying so hard I wish you could see that x

[taurean]

Saz,

Ginger and polar have come through this problem and they are asking you to follow them.

Quick reminder - you have an underlying fear that you may have done something truly awful at an event several years ago. No suggestion that this is the case has eventuated.

You are obsessing about it such that it is regularly a focus in your mind, and you have agonised over it tried to think it through sought guidance, read other poasts - all compulsions.

And it is a recognised OCD flavour.

And you get thoughts demanding certainty, suggesting its real.Raising huge doubt issues.

All of those things you will recognise from previous posts and other posts are indicative of OCD with this type.Where is the diofficulty now?

Edited January 24, 2015 by taurean

[Guest Saz]

When it's put like that it seems easy and like I should be able to just let this go. As I said above I am trying, had a wobbly couple of days I'm sorry and sad to say.

I have this new thing going on at the moment, jeezo its not a patch on this memory thing but its unfortunately got me thinking. I am kind of obsessing about wrinkles on my forehead and I've taken to sticking selltoape over them to try and minimise them (laugh if you want because I know it sounds ridiculous) I don't obviously wear the tape out just in the house or overnight. Anyway what's worrying me is that these wrinkles are there, visible to see, a real thing so I'm obsessing about a REAL thing so this just cripples me now and convinces me that my memory is real. Everything links back to it so no mattet what I do, even when I try so so hard its all for nothing x

[gingerbreadgirl]

You're ruminating saz absolutely constantly - whether you realise that's what you're doing or not. All of the above, and this thread and every other thread is a huge exercise in rumination and reassurance seeking.

Nobody here underestimates how difficult and painful this is. But unfortunately at the moment you are like somebody washing their hands over and over and over and wondering why their OCD is getting no better x

[Guest Saz]

I know I'm relentless. Thanks for still being my friend in all this, and thanks to everyone else too who cares x

[gingerbreadgirl]

It's OK, we've all been there x

[taurean]

There is no real connection between the false memory and the wrinkles Saz.

The only connection is a made up connection which is irrational and another OCD intrusion.

As we have said many times, watch for these thoughts in any guise to try and trick you into believing the false memory.

Do you remember us saying that?

[Yrrow]

Sorry you are having such a hard time. I know it is rough! From what I can tell, you are trying to link things that are unrelated. It seems like you are trying to connect things that are not relevant to each other and then make a conclusion. These are all logical fallacies, faulty analogies, and irrelevant conclusions. The only common denominator that I can see is anxiety and rumination, and obsessions and compulsions.

[gingerbreadgirl]

I think I get what you're saying, Saz.

You're saying that if you can obsess over something real (i.e. the wrinkles) then that means your obsession about the false memory might be real as well.

This all feeds back into your desperation for certainty that this is OCD and not a real memory. But as we've said many times, your quest for certainty will unfortunately always fail because it simply isn't possible.

You need to be more alert to when you're ruminating - any kind of analysis whatsoever, any daydreaming, any time you find yourself trying to make the anxiety go away - stop. Make yourself turn away from it, no matter how difficult. x

[Guest Saz]

Yes that is exactly it guys, thinking because im now kind of obsessing over a real thing then my 'false memory' must be real. Although maybe people don't really see any wrinkles...and I do tend to fixate a lot on my imperfections.

Hope I feel better soon x

[Guest Saz]

Just to add this post isn't really about wrinkles but about worrying if my memory is real. I hope you understand x