Jump to content

Who am I kidding? [It totally is controlling my life]


Guest SignOfLazarus

Recommended Posts

Guest SignOfLazarus

Hi.

I was "officially" diagnosed with OCD a little over three years ago, the assumption being that I have Pure O [Pure Obsessional] subtype. I'm going to say I absolutely agree with this and when I was diagnosed with OCD things suddenly made way more sense than anything else we had tried to use to explain what was going on.

I have a couple other diagnoses, but the OCD pretty much is the life-ruiner for me.

I do have Pure O, but when things get really really bad it will even "overflow" beyond that and begin to manifest outwardly and physically- I get more into checking [physical checks], handwashing, repeating actions, being more and more worried about germs/disease, having to arrange and sort things.

I came here, specifically, because of this: To help you understand... "Pure-O" [by ScottOCDid] I actually came across it a while ago and have found it to be the single best tool to help me explain to others and continue to understand, myself, what is going on.

Though I now understand that OCD has very clearly been a problem for years and years, I didn't know what it was at the time, particularly when I was eventually confining myself to the house because- to distill it down- I was simply afraid.

I am no longer confined to the house but it is still really controlling my life, which I didn't realize until recently. I would say somewhere between 75-90% of the things I do/don't do, say/don't say are dictated by the fears brought on by the OCD. This is so awful. And this is a vast improvement!

I am at least grateful that I am able to talk about it way more- but there is still so much that I CAN NOT talk about having to do with the OCD, and it really does inhibit me from so much.

Working on getting into an intensive therapy program [again, only focused on OCD], because it is just so exhausting. I spend so much time on this.

Anyway. Thanks!

Link to comment

Welcome to the forum, Lazarus. You are not alone. This is a community of OCD sufferers. We have all kinds here.

Do take a look at the main forum to see what we've been talking about and don't be afraid to jump right in.

Link to comment
Guest carinasanfey

Hugs to you, SignsOfLazarus. We all know how horrible this is, and I hope you find a treatment that works for you. Are you regular seeing a psychiatrist that you trust? Do you have a good group of friends/family that you can talk to when things are really bad?

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
×
×
  • Create New...