Lost_in_a_Dark_Maze

Thank you, Angst. I will do my best to get there. I should have gone a long time ago really, but hopefully it is nothing serious.

Thank you, I'll let you know how it goes.

I couldn't get the DVD player to work in the end, so I'll have to save it for another time. I've just had a call from the breast clinic. They want me to go on Monday at 10.45am. I don't know if I can manage that early, but I felt I had to accept it as it was a cancellation and they're putting me in as mine was an urgent referral.

Thank you.

Thank you, Andrea

I don't have cooking facilities, but I do have a fridge. I'm just eating cold food, as I don't feel able to eat out or get takeaways. We haven't had cooked food for a couple of years anyway, so I'm used to it. Thank you, I am very tired so am just eating then hope to relax and watch some of the film before bed. I have to be very close to the TV screen though!

Thank you I accidentally left it at the check out to start with and had to go back for it! It's Julie & Julia. Hope it's good xxx

Hey everyone Thank you for your support. I made it! I have a 2 week referral to the breast clinic, but he's hopeful it isn't serious. I had to be weighed and have my blood pressure taken. Feel filthy now, but I went to Sainsburys for some more supplies and got myself a cheap DVD as a reward. Then I walked from there back to the guest house instead of getting a taxi. Oh, and I used a cash machine. I now have cleaning up to do. I saved my shower till now and am changing clothes, but I'll try not to go too over the top with the dettol wipes!

Thank you, guys. I'll let you know how it goes xxx

So tempted to cancel. I feel sick. It wouldn't be so bad if I could keep all my clothes on, but I have a lump that needs examining.

Thank you both. It's mountain climbing tomorrow! (Actually it's the doctor's surgery. Apart from hospitals and public toilets it's my most feared place for germs.)

Thank you, Caramoole. I'm back from town. Been to the optician's, the JobCentre and went into a couple of shops. Got a shock at the optician's. My current glasses are about -6 I was expecting 9 or 10 maybe but I now need -13! Explains why I can't see.

Thank you, Gemma. I'm just getting ready to go to the optician's again!

I don't know really. I guess I'm just suffering the after effects of trying to be normal. It's exhausting! I've taken some paracetamol and talked to my mum and feel a bit better.

Slept better, but feeling awful today.

Thank you, I don't feel so silly now. I'm just so exhausted, and I actually made it on time too, which is a first!

Thank you, I hung it on. My mum has had to go elsewhere, because she needs somewhere wheelchair accessible. I feel like crying now. I went to the optician's and I'd got the wrong day. My appointment is tomorrow.

I've already made a total idiot of myself with the people who run it!

Thanks, I'm too scared to ask. I think I'll just put it on. I feel like leaving it there permanently lol.

Thank you, Phil. I haven't had much sleep, but hopefully I'll have a better night tonight now the first night is out of the way. I keep worrying that the owners of the guest house are going to walk in on me! Do they do that, does anyone know? If I shower should I hang the 'please do not disturb notice on the door?

Thank you. I'm struggling now. I can't sleep, I feel like I'm suffocating. Whenever I start to drift off I wake up again. My eyes and throat are itchy too. I think I'm maybe having an allergic reaction. This guest house allows pets, so there may have been a dog in here recently. I seem to have swapped one allergen (dust and mould) for another! I need a drink, but if I get up for one and open the fridge door it will make it start making a racket again and it has gone quiet now. If I open a window it will make a noise and also I can't see how to do it. I ache all over.

Thank you, Sophhh. Not too late at all. Good luck, you can do it too! x

Thanks Caramoole. I know, I can hardly believe it myself! I'm not even crying that I want to go home yet. I think the hardest part so far is using the guest house toilet. I am going to try showering tomorrow morning, then I have my eye test to go to in the afternoon. I have done quite a lot of compulsions since arriving at the guest house, but fewer than usual. I will be getting ready for bed now.

Thank you everyone. It does feel good. Although I can't help worrying I must be a fraud as I managed it and am coping much better than I thought I would!