Snowdog

I had this last year it didn’t do any thing for me.. x

Aw yeah forgot to say yes that is a compulsion you are doing I learnt that one in Cbt.. I used to do that one ..now I don’t do it.. it was hard a first but it does get easier just remember it’s Ocd.. so just plans things yes your anxity and ocd will get worse at first but it gets easier with time x

Just wanted to say your not alone here with my harm thoughts I’m having the exact Same ones towards my daughter.. you will still have the thoughts towards him until you accept the thoughts has just thoughts and they can’t harm you I know it sucks im going it to.. keep strong xx

Hi welcome to the forum.. thanks for your post I would like to point out something you said in your post that if we don’t seek help we will find yourslefs in dangerous places what do you mean by this what places are your talking about ?

This is what I was doing when I was in Italy last weekend lots of mindfullnsss take it all in.. it’s just ruined my whole weekend there.. my pills do good tho for flying I used to be so bad at flying I was so so scared of flying now I love it so much now I just want to sit on them al day long now lol.. im at week four of putting my escitlopram up it’s just getting worse there either gonna put me up again or change to something else.. not because of my Ocd becuase my depression is so so bad right now.. but I will try and do what I’ve learnt today and what you have taught me to and see how I get on I will keep you posted.. kind regards xx

Hi Roy thanks for your reply how are u feeling ? Your always up at such hours ain’t you lol.. so here I go again with this has you see.. I’ve been doing all this so I don’t know what I’m doing so wrong yesyerday i was like what would of Roy tell me to do if he was here..I’ve been doing it all.. i will do Roy thanks for your kind words xxx

Hey p.b thank you for your reply I really appreciate it.. I don’t freak out when I get them no more becuase so used to them now after so many years...becuase I know there just intrusive thoughts I must be doing complusions like u said but I have no idea what complusions im doing must be ruminating like u said but when I get a intrusive thought I just carry on with what I’m doing I don’t do nothing that’s why Im asking here.. I’m trying very hard to do what I’ve been taught but it’s making me so depressed like I’m in such a dark place from it now like you understand and just don’t get what I’m doing wrong.. Like yesterday I was busy all day doing skip runs etc moving stuff making dinner You know carrying on with stuff have thoughts carry on it don’t work.. then it gets to half way tho the day like three I just want to go back to bed and break down or sleep just to shut thoughts up..but no I carry on.. but then I’m exhausted then I go bed early..I have no enjoyment in life becuase of them right now.. it be ok I could deal maybe deal one every hour right now not one every second again.. so like now I get up yeah carry on have my breakfast carry on with my day and intrusive thoughts are coming to harm everyone this is so ridiculous becuase I know it’s all **** in my head so I really don’t get it I don’t think I’m ruminating like you said I must be tho for it to keep coming.. But can’t work out we’re I am becuase this is what happends Intrusive thought- stab him carry on with what I’m doing no other thoughts intrusive thought- you know you want to carry on with what I’m doing just like that so I’m not even answering them.. And this is all day long just wrote this has example.. so maybe in the mix of it in replying to them you say ? Is that what you mean like in the mix of it I might say my mind is so mental please help understand would appreciate it kind regards snow x

So sorry Hun I only just seen this I’ve been very unwell thanks for your kinds words I Hope your ok x

Hi there has you know I’m goin tho the thick of it again with harm intrusive thoughts..every thought is a harm intrusive thought .. kill her kill him what If i harm them what if I ran them over... just drive pass police and I’m having thoughts I done it etc.. come home pick up knife stab everyone omg it’s every second right now I’ve had cbt I’ve had two lots actually I’m putting everything in to place I’m not doing no compulsions I don’t think but could you please tell me we’re I’m going wrong with it. Because it’s be non stop it’s driving me nuts my head going to explode.. it’s making me very low becuase also with intrusive harm images..it just constant again and I don’t know what to do yeah I know there just thoughts and I carry on With what I’m doing but it’s still so bad ..so what am I’m doing so wrong please some one give me some advice please.. x

Hi how are you today ? You feeling any better Please be strong I’ve been here before and here again in the same situation and I promise you it will get better and you wkll get this under control again like.. how long have you been stuffering with Ocd ? X

Hi lost sorry for late reply I’m really not well my Ocd right now and I didn’t want to come on here post.. hope your doing ok.. yeah I’m just going to try and rest and look after myself for now I think I went back to work to soon i defo Jump in at the deep end and I paying for it now.. x

Sorry only just getting back to you right now I’m really dreadful right now.. saw my pdoc on Tuesday we gonan put my medication up again see if it works..i be told by him to no way can I go to work right now Becuase my Ocd is really bad that I got to get it back under control.. aw Hun hope he gets better soon I wish he all the best in recovery to.. xx

Hi this might give you a bit a comfort but I also suffer harm intrusive thoughts and I also had a really bad day yesterday and said the exact thing to someone I rather die than harm anyone so I know how you feel so I wanted you to know your not alone... im still struggling with it now and have been all week because I have had my meds upped because my depression was bad... I’m not sleeping etc to.. but first thing to do is you got to stop the panic sit down glass of water and some mindfullnsss will help listen for sounds look at colours anything maybe go for a walk listens to how many sounds you can hear at the same time etc make yourself feel grounded it’s really helps me when panic anxiety at is high..and a nice hot cup of calming tea from Holland Barrett calm me right down you should get some always helps when I’m in panic I put two tea bags in and I feel so much better so calm I don’t want to do anything but relax.. i hope your medication starts to work soon and everything settles down.. be kind to yourself x

Hey Hun yeah I’ve been doing good so haven’t been on lately.. I completed my cbt and I started my new job but had to give that up becuase I was thrown in at the deep end and it was to much for me so I got a get another job soon after this increase dies down a bit and start work again but do it slowly.. aw that’s really good to hear your doing a lot better I think what it sometimes we just have to get on with it..aw really I’ve had a bad time with sertline to made me nuts that stuff.. how is he doing now any better ? Yeah I’m of to the doctors tommrow.. hoping she know what’s going and I got physiatrist on Tuesday so we can have a chat then.. it’s just on repeat my intrusive again I’m in deep end with them again and nothing shifting it not even when I’m being mildfull aw well hope just temporary like you said and can’t move passed this.. xx

Thanks Roy for your reply yeah My head just about to explode from thoughts I’m trying everything u taught and it’s not letting up its due to increase nothing else because it was fine before...I got such a headache from it today.. If I was you I wouldn’t think of cutting down just yet because your so well let your self a break for a bit longer.. that’s my head today I can’t stop the loop It’s making me really irritable x

Hey Hun how are u and everything ? Haven’t spoke to you in ages.. i like to know that to why does your intrusive thoughts get worse on increase I don’t get it.. when it’s poss to about cbt when medication Does increase them .. thanks hun me to because I’ve a good few months and I’m going mad again.. Xx

Ok thanks pb x

Hi guys hope your all well.. can I ask why does a increase of medication course a increase of intrusive thoughts??? I don’t get it First week was fine I wouldn’t even tell the difference half way tho the second and I’m flooded back with inteusive thought when most of them were gone.. and still going on day 17 I didn’t even have it upped for Ocd I had up for deep depression and I had to because it was so bad.. . I just wonder why it does that I’m at the end of my teather with them again not sure if I should carry tho or just come back down.. x

Hey guys hope you are well.. i would love to have your support today forums friends... because ive come a long way since I spoke to you lot in the summer.. i thought I come on today and let you know we’re i am right now I’m really scared right now has I’m sat outside work waiting to go in for my first day back at WORK that’s right I’m going back to work for the first time in 5 years.. I’m very scared because how bad my Ocd has been has and you all know about my harm intrusive thoughts ... so since I spoke to u all ive had lots of cbt and now I’m at the stage I can go back to work I think .. the reason I’m scared because no one knows I have Ocd at work and no support so I would love some support from you guys today because I’ve never had to deal with Ocd in work so this is my next stage so I don’t want to expect.. xx snow xx

Hi there yes it's make sense I've been tho this one before.. This time last year I found it to be the hardest one to get tho..I was listening out for everything.. thought I was hearing voices etc thought I was hearing conversations etc...it drove me crazy.. it's just your ocd latching on to something different to try and frighten you.. I also suffer from harm intrusive thoughts so I know exactly what you mean.. try and relax do some more mindfulness every day even if it's just for 10 mins a day it works... you will get tho this I did when I thought I wouldn't now I look back at laugh at myself for being silly and making myslef ill over it.. easier said then done I know.. but it was cbt and mindfulness that done the trick... ? Hope you feel better soon snow x

What a great post Hun ? So true ? We do Roy ? Thanks again for everything and everything you said earlier thanks for getting me were I am today feeling better than yesterday and helping me getting out the thought loop today ? We no reassurance at all Xx

Thank you for your replies I fell a sleep after I posted this worn myslef out I just woke up panicking and my intrusive thoughts are tho the roof and I'm in a right panic ? X

Hi Hun i just seen your post I'm not ignoring your post right now I'm in a right mess and I'm finding it hard to do much else..just wanted to say I'm thinking of you ok.. be strong Hun xxx ?

My head won't stop doing rituals the intrusive thoughts are getting worse and worse there non stop now how do I stop the rituals I just can't seem to stop this is my head.. it's making me so anxious that I'm feeling so uncomfortable in my own body (skin) like I need to get out of my own body and leave it behind I'm in such a state I can't relax I feel like I'm losing my mind totally .. What do I do right now that will help ? Please help me I'm at my wits end.. ?

Thanks polar bear that's what I did i after I wrote the post I read some more in my ocd book then I went for a 20 mins run then I went a picked my new puppy I've been waiting for then had something healthy to eat and reply to a friend of mines post on here and went to bed I just woke up and hope it's a better day.. has I know you have the same sort of theme has me did you in your recovery do a recording exposure at all and did you find it helpfull I'm a bit scared to do to be honest but I'm trying to think anything better than this everyday.. x