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OCD-UK Member
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About dksea

  • Birthday 11/08/1980

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    Tokyo, Japan

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  1. Hi @Samosa and welcome to the forums. I am sorry to hear that you are having a tough time right now. Its certainly true that the world is experiencing some unusually stressful situations at the moment, and a lot of people are struggling in ways they are not used to. It can feel like talking about our problems in the midst of that is selfish, but if you are hurting you are hurting. OCD is a valid problem too, it doesn't go away just because other people have problems of their own. Unfortunately the stress of the world around us can make our own struggles harder, I think a lot of us are experiencing extra levels of anxiety today compared to at other times. It can be scary to think about losing our loved ones, but keep in mind that having a thought does not mean its more likely to be true. Its ok to feel bad or scared or sad sometimes, but try and remind yourself that these thoughts are just that, thoughts. Your brain will latch on to them more the more you react to them. Use the CBT skills you've learned to try and avoid panic over these thoughts. They don't have to (and won't ) disappear over night, Your family and loved ones are here now. Try to focus on enjoying that
  2. I think there is a difference between 'settling' and living a happy and fullfiling life in which some of your dreams don't come true. For one, as others have mentioned, dreams change over time. We grow, we learn, we experience new things and that shapes our goals and our hopes and our dreams. Where I am now in life is not at all where I'd imagined I'd be 10, 15, 20 years ago. Things happened, I had new experiences, the course of my life shifted in ways I couldn't have planned for. That doesn't mean I've "settled" though, far from it. Along the way I reevaluated my priorities and goals, and aimed for new and different things. And I keep doing that, as we all should. Imagine you had a dream of being a baker. Of opening your own shop someday and selling delicious cakes and pies, etc. You go to school, learn lots of baking skills. Finally the day comes where you can work at a baking shop, getting some experience to open your own store someday. You have a good time, you enjoy your job baking. But you notice the owner doesn't do much baking, she's always busy with bills, and ordering supplies, working with customers, fixing equipment. You realize that you enjoy the baking part but have no interest in the business side of things. So your dream changes. You could keep trying to follow your dream, open your own shop, etc. but what if that would make you miserable? Should you follow your dream endlessly just because? I don't think so. Dreams change as we do.Some dreams you will accomplish, some you won't. Life meaning is not measured in how many dreams we fulfill. You can be happy and fulfilled without meeting all your dreams in life.
  3. Two things I think worth commenting on here. First, is the attempt to solve your problem of being stuck by buying the writing course. While its an understandable step to take in normal circumstances, I would be willing to bet that it won't actually help much since your problem is one of OCD and your difficulty making choices and committing to them. If you'd asked to begin with I would have recommended against buying the course just because I don't think it will address that problem. Second, however, is the act of buying, then refunding, then rebuying. Again this touches on your aversion to commitment and the issues surrounding that. The best thing you can do for yourself is just to keep the course and move on. If you can find anything useful from it, great. If not, oh well, lesson learned. Returning it (again) would be a hassle on the seller and taking advantage of their policy. Do both yourself and them a favor and just stick with the purchase this time. Also, while its true that information can often be found for free, that doesn't mean its presented in as useful a fashion as when you pay for it. Consider this an opportunity to explore this information in a different way and you might find you learn something new even if it seems like what you've learned before.
  4. Yes, I do, which right now is probably best in terms of physical health since I don't have to worry about transmission that way. And I actually don't mind living alone, its nice to have somewhere to relax and retreat to when I want some alone time. But I very much miss socializing with people! Online stuff absolutely helps, but its not the same as a good old in person gathering! Definitely looking forward to those again down the line
  5. I want to be The Rock. Not like The Rock, I want to become The Rock. He seems like a cool dude with a fun life. Jason Momoa or Will Smith also acceptable 🤣
  6. Dinner together with friends Karaoke together with friends Going to Disneyland and DisneySea together with friends Basically doing anything together with friends Us extroverts are bad at social isolation, 😆
  7. Name ten things you don’t like that everyone else likes... here’s mine: 1. Macaroni and Cheese 2. Peanut butter 3. Family Guy 4. Big Bang Theory 5. Dave Mathews Band 6. Alcohol 7. Coffee 8. Dancing (doing it myself) 9. Milk chocolate 10. Soccer (what you blokes call football)
  8. Its absolutely understandable to be anxious right now, and that is also likely to exacerbate your OCD. Its hard enough to deal with OCD when the world around us is mostly "normal" but its even more challenging now that the world around is isn't normal! But you can do it, we all can. Work on accepting that you can't control everything, that you can only do your best. Work on accepting that you can't be perfect, none of us can. OCD demands impossible standards, you don't have to live up to them.
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