yellow369

i have recently been interested in law and have been reading/ watching legal related things. this involves lot of crime obviously and i suddenly got the thought of being scared that i would commit crime like murder or something. i have had these thoughts before so i wasnt immediately repulsed and i was trying to just brush off the thoughts by thinking that it would be okay.. they would send me to prison and i wouldnt hurt anyone else. then i panicked because why wasnt i immediately scared and anxious about these thoughts.. now i am scared.. please someone tell me this is ocd. i am not a horrible person and i would never hurt anyone.. sorry about the lack of capitals, my phone isnt really working with this post thing

I really need help. It is 2 o'clock in the morning and I still haven't finished praying (started at about 11), I keep getting stuck on the same line repeating over and over, argh.. I want to sleep so badly :/ I have to pray and the time I pray for has gone from about 5 minutes to well over an hour in a very short space of time, and I am losing a lot of sleep over it. I have little things that I obsess over whilst praying that change over time, for a while it was how my throat felt.. if my mouth didn't feel right then I would repeat part of the prayer, then it was whether or not I needed the toilet (which meant I was going to the loo every 5 minutes) and now I can't have anything touching my chest because if I do, I feel like I will inadvertently cause someone to get cancer whilst I am praying. I am aware of how ridiculous this sounds.. but that's the way it is. I also have to be breathing right which means I keep changing my breathing and this is extremely uncomfortable and makes the praying even slower. My family aren't even religious.. Now I had better go and finish praying -.- or I will never get any sleep. Sorry about listing out all my problems, but it helps to let it out, even if it is online. I just want to be able to tell someone, anyone, that I think I have OCD so I that I can do something about this.

Absolutely, all of the time they say "oh i'm so OCD" and it really irritates me... it's still on tv aswell, I was watching Law and Order and a guy said "yeah its all in the books, I'm OCD about it" - this isn't doing anything to help peoples view of OCD.

So i still have had no luck telling anyone that i think i have OCD. I just wish i could tell someone, but i guess the lack of understanding of the disorder makes it more difficult. It has been so much worse recently because i have been so stressed with exams and not being able to tell anyone about it and now my exams are over and it hasn't got any better :/ i just need to tell someone who would understand, i just cant face telling my parents.. is there any way i could tell a doctor or anyone at college without them having to tell my parents? (i'm 16) because i just dont want it to all happen at once, if that makes any sense :S it isn't something i can just talk about, at the moment it is mostly just praying but nearly 2 years ago i was really struggling with anxiety and i think i had/have pocd :/ it has been better since i have found that it could be OCD and i know its not just me but i still avoid situations and people are starting to notice this :s it's not something that i would be comfortable talking about to be honest. I just have no idea what to do and its affecting me now, im losing so much sleep because of the praying :s any advice would be appreciated

Thanks for replying yeah, I agree it is so much better when you know it isn't just you, so even though neither of us are getting anywhere we helped each other!

Hi, I did write a post on this before but it has been getting worse ..so overall I have many things that make me think I have OCD like praying over and over and also pocd thoughts. I think I have it but I havent told anyone or been diagnosed so I know that this means I might not have OCD but I have had one particular thing on my mind recently, and if someone could tell me that it could be related to OCD then this would be a massive relief for me. So it started when I got a good result in my exam, I didnt really expect it but i worked really hard and this is the first thing that I have been really good at, but the problem is i keep thinking about the teacher of the subject. Please dont judge, I cant do anything about it, and its all the time. I find myself wanting to impress him and do really well in the subject. Even when im out of school, i am always thinking things like 'what would he think if he saw me now?' or 'what if he is in that car driving past?'. I have been revising so hard for the next exam and i am worried that this is going to affect it, i just wish the thoughts would go away. The thing is, when i am having the thoughts they arent negative... but when I realise what I am thinking about I start to panick. I just want to know why he is in my thoughts all of the time and I also want to say that I know this sounds really gross and weird, believe me i know! And I also want to say that they arent sexual thoughts and I dont find him attractive or anything.. its just so annoying. I just so hope that this is OCD and not me going mad or being attracted to him or something :/ it is really getting me down.

Thanks for answering my questionsNorthern Star, I am really grateful and thanks nik, that sounds kinda like what I have- when I take my mind off it it's like it's gone so hopefully there's nothing wrong

Thanks so much for your reply I have felt under a lot of pressure to tell someone about this, but it is nice to be reminded that I am in control. My throat is just the same, I did tell them although it isn't really bad- it's not painful, just feels weird when I swallow so I still think it could be related to all of the swallowing and coughing that I have been doing recently. Sorry it is unrelated but I was wondering what happens when you start seeking help and I have a few questions; I know you have to go to your GP, can they diagnose you or do they refer you to a psychiatrist? How much detail should you go into when talking to a GP? because I don't really have the 'common' symptoms of OCD like handwashing etc and I would feel uncomfortable explaining everything in detail to someone who doesnt know a lot about all of the symptoms. Does the person diagnosing you tell you straight away whether you have it or do you have to wait? Who do you discuss treatments with? I would be really greatful if someone could answer these questions for me thanks for you time

I have read a few things about frequent urination and OCD but are they actually linked? Because surely the urge to go I toilet is not linked to the mind and therefore is a physical thing?

Just going to start by saying that I haven't been diagnosed. I am stressed out at the moment with exams so everything's worse, my praying in the evening has gone from about 5 minutes to nearly an hour in a short period if time which means i go to sleep later so im always tired and I am constantly obsessing over my throat whilst praying, I keep swallowing and coughing until it feels right and now my throat feels horrible, I don't know if its linked but now I feel as if I have a lump I my throat constantly so I don't even know how to begin praying tonight. I am also panicking in case it's something really bad in my throat because my tonsils look different. I don't know what to do, if I tell someone about my throat I just hope it isn't linked to me swallowing because I can't tell anyone about the OCD etc :/

Yeah I hope so the teacher asked me the first question "what is OCD?" I completely panicked and said I don't know!

Started OCD today, i went in open minded hoping that maybe it would help me learn, but it wasnt so great, we largely covered the things like hand washing/ordering/checking and i know these can be debilitating but i do wish people knew about the things that people can't see like intrusive thoughts etc. I felt quite uncomfortable to be honest, people were saying things like "well why don't they just stop doing it?" Hopefully it will be better next lesson!

Thanks, good luck in your exams

Yeah I do agree, it would be a good chance to learn more about it. I am worried that if I do tell a teacher or even accidentally tell someone, that they will tell my parents and it will all happen too fast. I have been waiting a year already to tell my parents and I just can't so I guess telling someone would be a good start. I just don't know to what extent teachers have to keep what we say to themselves because I know in some situations teachers have to inform parents. It would all be easier if everyone understood ocd! I hope you find the courage to tell someone soon

Thanks yeah, I think i could possibly try this, its just so difficult to start the conversation. Also, we are going to start studying OCD in Psychology next week and I find it extremely uncomfortable sat in a lesson listening to others disucssing it, i am worried i will cry or something stupid like that, I am extremely stressed out with my exams at the moment and everything, including this, is just getting on top of me. I have considered telling my teacher about it actually.. but i am not sure yet. Have you managed to tell anyone about your OCD yet?