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About ktams

  • Birthday 14/01/1983

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  1. I have suffered with OCD for nearly 20 years now and I've been on various medications for over 13 years. I am at the point where I am stable on 60mg fluoxetine. However, I'm really not happy with the side effects I seem to still be getting after all these years. I was wondering if there were any alternative medications? Karen.
  2. p.s I'm already regretting it. Sometimes as hard as things get, it's easier to sit back and just deal with it. The whole 'opening up' to people is sooooo difficult. I just hope it pays off.
  3. I was discharged 2.5 years ago and all has been going well until recently. I just feel that I need support. I can't understand my feelings and emotions at all. I feel numb but I feel jumbled. It's not my OCD as much, more my feelings and emotions. I feel like I'm stuck. Something is missing. I feel angry. Alone. Confused. Lost. I feel like I don't know who am I. I feel like I want to run away where no-one knows me and I can be myself - except I don't know who myself actually is. I don't feel good enough. I feel judged. I don't have friends and I feel like making friends is impossible because of all the thoughts and feelings the process brings up. Are they laughing at me? Do they think I'm weird? Do they think i I'm stupid? Are they only talking to me because they feel like they don't have a choice? This is a long term problem that is getting worse again. Sorry, I don't expect a reply. I just wanted to write and empty my mind. No luck emptying my mind though. Karen.
  4. I'm fine talking about pretty much every single symptom of my OCD without embarrassment. I've suffered with OCD for nearly 20 years, but there is this one aspect that I get embarrassed about. Heck, I'm not even sure it is OCD or not, so I figured I'd ask you guys. Here goes. Every time i find myself 'attracted' to someone I become realllllly fixated on them. I had a relationship with a teacher like this when I was a teen in secondary school. I was obsessed with her and craved her attention. Sometimes I'd see her as a mother figure, other times I was certain I was sexually attracted to her. I was never really scared of the sexual feelings because I'm actually with ok being homosexual (I don't like labels but I'd pretty much class myself a lesbian). Therefore, it's not HOCD. It just I was and am so confused because my feelings would change a lot between the two or overlap (Mother figure or Crush). This isn't the only time it happens, it happens A LOT with many different people over the years. My mind tries to convince me that the person i am attracted to would or could feel the about me. I start imagining a life with them, sometimes with people I barely know - all based off an 'attraction' of sorts. The periods of 'attraction' leave me feeling I am on a roller coaster. I will have periods where I really start to believe my thoughts and really imagine this fantastic life with them; a life full of happiness and contentment and love, but then there are periods of extreme depression when I remember that it's not real and will never be real. I doubt I will ever have a normal relationship with anyone because of this. Even the relationship I had with my children's father was one built out of a possible false attraction. I was looking for someone to save me. I'm probably not making much sense at all. Karen.
  5. Sorry, I took it once quite a few years ago but I had an allergic reaction to it. Are you taking it? Thinking of taking it?
  6. I agree. I was taking this about 12 years ago. Even missing a dosage gave me horrible side effects. I've switched medications a few times and have never experienced withdrawal like I did coming off Venlafaxine!
  7. Thanks both for your replies. I hope to have a proper look around the board soon and hope to get to know some of you better. I will offer as much support as I can Smillsoid - we are on the same medication and dosage. I've found that it's the only one that has helped me to control my symptoms. Sertraline 200mg worked well for me, but not nearly as well as Fluoxetine 60mg does. Karen.
  8. I'm Karen, 30 from Cornwall. I've suffered with OCD for nearly 20 years now, but I wasn't diagnosed until I turned 17, when I was also diagnosed with Endogenous Depression. Over the last 13 years I have tried several therapies, including CBT and have been on various SSRI/SNRI's. I have been medication free a few times, two of which were during pregnancies. My OCD has been relatively under control for a couple of years now. Feel free to ask any questions. Karen.
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