Dave

That's great advice, thanks. I will keep you updated. When I get a panic attack I feel like I'm going to go insane and die! They're so frightening. Yes, the fear of a panic attack is definitely a cause of them. Thanks again!

I have suffered from unpleasant intrusive thoughts. I highly recommend the book Brainlock - it really helped me.

Hi Caramoole! Thank you very much for your reply. It's reassuring to know that somebody else on here has been through this. Did you suffer from actual panic attacks? Regardless, I think your advice is very good. I am actually reading the Bible now, as I find it comforting, and I am trying to accept that when my time comes it comes, and worrying and being anxious will not change anything. The services provided are slightly different in Scotland, but I am on to it. Thank you again!

Hello PolarBear! Thanks very much for your reply. To say it won't be easy is an understatement! It is terrifying. I think I will have to do things gradually. Thanks again for your advice though, it's much appreciated.

Hi, I realise it's been three years since I visited the forum. I have been blessed with few serious obsessions these past few years, and I have lived a pretty normal life. However, I have recently developed a crippling obsession that's even stopping me from leaving my house - cardiophobia, or a fear of having a heart attack. Just writing the words 'heart attack' gives me a rather unpleasant panicky feeling. I have convinced myself that due to twenty years of heavy drinking and smoking I am likely to have damaged my cardiovascular system, and therefore a heart attack is a real possibility. Because of this I am suffering panic attacks, during which my heart races and I have palpitations. I have been off work for the last four weeks and now can't even leave my house without having a panic attack. My GP just thinks I'm neurotic and told me to go and exercise and get some fresh air. Friends of mine have just told me to go out and ride out the panic attacks, but I can honestly say the feeling of anxiety is so intense it is akin to when I thought I was drowning in the sea as a child, and I am terrified of them. I really don't know what to do any more. I am going to try to go out with a friend - first to the local shops and then try and venture out a little further each day. I will keep a diary to record what I hope will be the progress I make. I will try to meditate. I have an exercise bike in my house, which I will try to use and attempt to gradually increase the distance and vigour each day. Is there anything else I can do? My main worry is that the stress and anxiety I'm feeling will actually cause a heart attack.

Hi Ashley, I'm ambivalent to this. Firstly I think that a soap will often attempt to reflect real society, and in that case they may justifiably claim that OCD has become an adjective. The character Abby is also scolded for using the term, it would appear. On the other hand soaps are watched by millions of people and it could be argued that as their programmes are influential and arguably help shape public opinion, producers have a responsibility to educate and inform their viewers to some extent.

I think it's the nature of the condition, unfortunately. You'll make progress, but occasionally you'll regress too. I think OCD sufferers tend to be more emotional, I know I certainly am. Have you tried meditation? There are some excellent breathing and meditation videos on YouTube. My suggestion would be to try them.

I'm having recurring, annoying thoughts about three different aspects of my life. They don't cause me considerable anxiety now, rather they just make me miserable. I've had horrendous, incredibly anxiety-ridden episodes in the past due to intrusive thoughts, and this is nowhere near as bad. However they're making me unhappy. One thought revolves around my career and I constantly compare myself to friends, family members and colleagues and feel like a failure. I'm trying to get promoted, but the thoughts go round and round in my head "what if I spend the rest of my life at this level?"..."what if the promotion system is changed soon, just after I've sussed out how it works and prepared for it?"..."what if no new vacancies are advertised for years, and there are no new opportunities for promotion?" Another one is about my failed love life, and the thoughts are "why did she go back to an ex who cheated on her twice, rather than stay with me?"..."what if I'm destined to spend my life alone?"..."why am I incapable of having long-term relationships?" The third are about autoimmune conditions, and were causing me a great deal of anxiety earlier in the year, but now they're just a cycle of thoughts. These thoughts occupy nearly all of my free time - i.e. the time I'm not spent actively doing other things. Are these OCD ruminations even though they're not causing me anxiety? Or are they just real life worries that everybody contends with?

I'm pleased to tell you that, based upon those facts, you've blown this out of all proportion. You've not committed a crime - you clicked on a link and viewed something that disgusted you. It's easy for me to say, I know, but you've not done anything wrong and should try to forget about it.

I have the same thoughts, sometimes. In fact when I recently took an HIV test, I was convinced I was going to be punished for my sins. It's very silly, as if you are a Christian, at least, then the whole concept is one of redemption through Jesus' suffering. However, I acknowledge it's silliness, but still worry about it on occasion. Unfortunately that's the nature of OCD.

As Cub said, that's a classic obsession. At an OCD gathering I attended about 70% of folk there stated they'd had similar thoughts. It's horrible, really horrible, but it's your OCD. I suggest you read Brain Lock, and follow the mantra "it's not me, it's my OCD". Take care.

Thanks, buddy. It does appear as though the urine tests have been done, too - as I phoned the line to get my results and thy specified what was what, i.e. "your urine test for chlamydia was negative"...so all does appear fine. I've not yet had my second call back yet, though.

Hi Franklin, Thanks again for your reply. I actually phoned the clinic this morning, and got a call back from a nurse, who stated all my results are negative. Great news, and I cried with relief. Only she told me all my results were negative, and I understood that gonorrhoea and chlamydia took longer because testing a urine sample takes longer. So, now I'm worried she's got me mixed up with somebody else or was just reassuring me because I was upset. I'm waiting for a second callback now to double check. My anxiety's a lot lower, but I'm still fretting. I can't control my OCD at all when it's like this, unfortunately. But I appreciate your advice. Thank you so much for responding.

National Health Service - it's free, but they'll send the bloods away to be tested, as I imagine it's cheaper to do it in one place. I've been researching, and calculating my odds: Going over my history, I've had around 13 partners in my lifetime. Of the four that could've exposed me to the virus - i.e. where I didn't use a condom - one is married with two children, and the NHS screens them, so I presume she's okay; one I know very well, and she's very unlikely to have the virus. So that leaves two, one of whom I had unprotected sex with once at least seven years ago, and the other one on two occasions fifteen years ago. Another source states that: So, assuming the two women I'm most concerned about were both very promiscuous, I'll say that they're more likely than a general member of the public (1.9 per 1,000) to have the virus - I'll assume it's 1 in 100. So of the three instances I'm most concerned about, the figure would be 2,500 x 100 = 1 in 250,000...but that's for a single instance. There were three exposures, which I believe would make it 3 in 250,000?! Does that sound correct? Even so, I keep thinking of the old lottery advert - "it could be you!" I mean people win the lottery at odds of several million to one, and I keep thinking that maybe this might be my unfortunate destiny, and hence why I always used to worry about it. I really wish I'd just not taken the test. The lady said it would give me peace, but it's just brought an old obsession to the fore. I missed work today because I got no sleep last night.

Thank you ever so much for your reply. That's good advice, and the fact that pregnant women are routinely screened means that there must be a lot of tests done each year.